I want him, but I won’t take him off someone else.
“Yes. And he’s the reason I had to leave in a hurry last night. Sean has asthma, and he had a bad attack. Paris texted me while I was with you to say that she’d taken him to the hospital.” He pauses for a moment, his eyes never leaving mine. “I’ve been with him most of today.” I know what he’s saying without actually speaking the words.
“And that’s why you never called me today,” I say softly, remorse filling me that I thought bad thoughts about him today.
He nods and we sit in silence for a few moments before he speaks again. “I am getting a divorce, Callie. It’s just a long and difficult road down that path. That’s all I meant when I said it was complicated. It does my head in most days, and you just caught me on a bad day.”
I want to throw a party. I want to scream my joy to the world, but I know the words “long, difficult road” probably don’t even scratch the surface of what Luke’s been through. To discover the woman you love—the mother of your child—is a murderer and has lied to you for years must be devastating. I can’t even begin to imagine how that must have felt. So, although he’s working towards a divorce, this isn’t as easy as simply leaving the person who betrayed you.
I bite my lip. I’m stalling because my heart is at war with my head and I don’t know which way to run.
Luke knows me better than I realised. “You think too much.” He closes the space between us, and my tummy flutters when his leg brushes against mine. When he cups my cheek, I suck in a breath. His touch is too much, but I’m helpless to stop him. “Tell me what you’re thinking,” he says, his face inches from mine.
Those lips, though.
My gaze is drawn to his mouth, and I trace it in my mind.
I want those lips on me again.
“Callie…”
I drag my gaze back to meet his. So much pain in those eyes. How have I never seen that before? “I’m thinking so many things… That I want you, but that goes against everything I’ve ever believed in. I don’t do married men, and I don’t break up families. And then I think maybe we could just stay as friends while you finalise your divorce, but spend way more time together than we have so we can get to know each other better.” I sigh. “And then I think about how much I loved last night and how much I really, really, want to do that again…” I take a deep breath. “I know I think too much, Luke, but there’s a lot to consider here.”
He rubs the pad of his thumb gently against my cheek and his eyes glaze a little like he’s lost in his thoughts. I wait silently for him to say something, wishing I could take back everything I said. Except for the part about sleeping with him again. That, I want. But I can’t take any of it back because everything I said is the God’s honest truth.
Finally, he speaks. “I want you and I’ll have you. One day. Until then, we’ll run this how you want and do this friend thing.” His voice grows growly when he adds, “But you need to know this is going to be fucking hard. Having you in my life, but not in my bed.”
The thrill of having a man who clearly wants me hits, and I can’t help myself—I smile. Big. Huge.
I open my mouth to say something, but Luke beats me. “I take it that smile means you’re good with this.”
“Yes, but Mr This-Is-Going-To-Be-Fucking-Hard, I need you to know that I feel you. I mean, hell, you’re talking to the girl who just broke her three-month freaking drought.”
His jaw tightens, and he leans close. His lips brush across my cheek, and he murmurs in my ear, “You’re not the only one who’s come out of a long drought.” And then he stands and takes a few steps away from me. He rubs the back of his neck, and I sense how on edge he is.
I stand and move to him. His back muscles tense when I place my hand on his shoulder. “I want to get to know everything about you, Luke Hardy,” I say, and he spins around to face me.
His eyes search mine. “You already know the important bits.”
“No, I don’t.” I rest my hand against his chest. “I don’t know the secrets you keep locked in here. They’re the important bits.”
His intake of breath is sharp, and he wraps his hand around mine. His other hand slides around my waist, and he pulls me close.
Oh, shit.
No.
Too close.
But his lips brush across mine before I can move out of his embrace. His hold is tight, and his message is very clear—he’s in charge here, and if a kiss is what he wants, a kiss is what he will have.