Sophie peered at me over her shoulder. “Why do you do that? If I looked at the world that way, I’d lose my mind.”
“And you shouldn’t be a pessimist. You have lots of choices.”
“I have the same number that you do.”
I shook my head and started to argue. But she rolled over and grabbed my chin. “When you’re back on your feet, you’ll see. I know you’ve had a bad run, but it’s going to get better.”
Arguing the point would only make me sound stubborn. So I kissed her on the nose and just settled into the moment. She nestled against my chest and everything was right with the world, if only for a short time.
“Is there anything I can do for you?”
I almost said no, but then I remembered something. “Actually, can you check my eBay account for me? I might have sold a couple of Porsche parts.”
“Sure. If you tell me your password.”
Oh, man. Busted. “It’s Sophie2010.”
She looked up, a question in her eyes.
“The year I first kissed you. I’m a sap, I know.”
“I like saps.”
“Good thing.” I squeezed her a little tighter.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Sophie
Internal DJ set to: “Auld Lang Syne,” the Barenaked Ladies version
Jude napped for a little while, and I lay there, just happy to be with him. Maybe he was still too sick and achy to see it, but things were about to turn around for us. After a while I heard May in the kitchen, so I got up and went to talk to her.
“How’s he doing?” she asked, stirring a pot of beef stew on the stove.
“Okay I guess. He doesn’t complain to me, though.”
“That’s good?” May guessed, peeking at me from beneath her bangs.
“Yes and no. I think he’s worried, but he won’t admit it. He’ll never admit it.” Even as the words left my mouth, I knew how much they bothered me. “Before, he preferred to get high than to tell me he was afraid.”
“Men, right? They don’t think they can speak their feelings.”
“Right. Although in Jude’s case, he grew up without anyone to tell them to. His mother split when he was young, and his father drank his feelings away.”
May winced. “Hello, role models.”
“Yeah.”
“Stay for dinner?” May asked. “The rest of my family has obviously abandoned us. I think they said something about going out for pizza.”
“Sure, thanks! What can I do to help you?”
“Not a thing. Audrey made this stew yesterday, so it’s incredible. Do you want to wake up Jude? We could get him to sit at the table like a human.”
“Good plan.”
“The rolls I’m warming in the oven will take ten minutes, though. So no rush.”
I went back into the TV room and perched on the edge of the couch. When I put a hand on Jude’s chest, he raised his good hand to cover mine without opening his eyes. “Hi,” he said, and the sound of his husky voice strummed right through me like a guitar chord. I missed him. I craved him.
“May heated up some stew for dinner. If you get up in ten minutes you can dine in a vertical position.”
He opened his eyes and smiled at me. “Sounds exciting.”
“I know, right?”
His fingers stroked mine. “So what have I missed in the past few days while I did my Rip Van Winkle imitation?”
“Ah, well…” I had no idea how Jude would react to the questions I was about to ask him. “I’ve been doing some digging.”
“What for?”
Clasping his hand in mine, I confessed. “I’ve been reading the police file from your accident three years ago.”
“What?” Jude removed his hand from mine and pushed himself upright with his good arm. “Why?”
“Because I still have some questions. I think we should hire an investigator, Jude. I’m not kidding.”
He blew out a frustrated breath. “That is a very bad idea, Soph. All that will happen is that your father gets pissed off.”
“Fuck him,” she whispered.
“No thanks,” he said through clenched teeth.
“He doesn’t get to decide what questions I ask anymore, though. I’ve given him way too much power over me.”
“Yeah? Well, let’s review,” Jude said sternly. “The last time my name came up in conversation he slapped your face. He’s threatening to condemn my garage, which is the only place I can earn a living. And his guys pull me over whenever they fucking feel like it. And you want to poke that bear?”
“Yes! I think there’s something fishy about the way your case was handled. Get this. Yesterday I learned that your trial lawyer—the public defender? He was disbarred last year. For negligence.”
Jude made a face. “That doesn’t shock me. But I still don’t know why it matters. Gavin is dead, baby. Even if my lawyer slept through the trial, that will never change. I already did my time, I got out. The only way life gets easier is if I make enough money to get out of that town so I don’t have to let them hassle me.”