Sabrina nodded and took another bite of kale and chicken. “Can you not mention this to Dan? It’ll just get him upset and I know he’s under a lot of stress at work.”
“Oh. Yeah, sure. Listen—so, I did want to talk to you about something else.” Sabrina raised her eyebrows at Katya. “That party. Andrew’s party. The thing we both saw on Isabel’s phone.”
“Yeah.” Again, Sabrina just seemed tired. Or resigned. Or…something. She didn’t seem surprised that Katya was bringing this up, at least. “It’s been weird. At work, I mean.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah.” Sabrina got a water bottle out of her bag and took a sip. “Can we talk just, like, casually? I don’t want my name associated with anything, and also, I feel like it’s already awkward that you work with Dan, and I don’t want him to know that I talked to you.” Weird, Katya thought. Sabrina was more concerned about Dan finding out than she was about Mack finding out?
“Yeah, of course. But do you mind if I take some notes? I just want to be able to remember what you say.”
Sabrina scrunched up her face. “Actually, I’d rather you didn’t. Just…I don’t know. Being a little paranoid, I guess.”
Being a reporter was like a delicate dance with a stranger where you were never quite sure whether you were leading or not, and if you stepped on someone’s toes, that person might run off the dance floor crying. Katya knew she had to tread carefully. She looked into Sabrina’s eyes—they were dark and revealed little. She noticed the fine lines around them, amplified by the fluorescent lighting. She wondered what it was like living with Dan.
“Right, sure, I get that. Well, let me ask you this—did you know that anything was going on between Isabel and Mack?”
Sabrina shook her head. “No way. They were very discreet. Now that I think about it, maybe he came over to our desk area a tiny bit more than he did to other people’s, but honestly, I’m kind of in my own world over there. Especially those first few months when I was just trying to, like, pretend I knew what I was doing. I had barely been on Twitter, you know? It was a miracle I even got that job.” Katya thought back to the day a few months ago when Dan had told her—during a smoke break, of course—that his wife (“of all people”) had gotten a job at TakeOff (“of all places”). Katya was surprised that he was so surprised, but now, having met Sabrina, she kind of understood. Sabrina exuded a world-weariness that would have seemed out of place at TechScene, let alone at TakeOff.
“Why do you think you got the job?” Katya asked this out of genuine curiosity, not because she felt like it was germane in any way to her story.
Sabrina shrugged. “There had just been an article somewhere, maybe it was in the Times, about how tech companies have such a horrible record when it comes to diversity, especially with older women of color.” She paused. “And by older I mean, like, over thirty. And I’d just had an article go viral. And I’m sure I was the only person over twenty-five who walked through the door who was interested in a coordinator-level job that paid fifty-two thousand a year. I mean, that’s a salary I would have been thrilled to make when I was your age, but to be thirty-six in New York City making fifty-two thousand is kind of sad.” Sabrina took another bite of salad. It was kind of sad, Katya thought. She herself was making forty-eight thousand, but like Sabrina said, she was twenty-four years old and happy to live in a crappy apartment with a roommate. “I mean, I know people who do it, and I’m not saying I’m not grateful to have this job, but it’s just…” She trailed off.
Katya decided to try to move on. “Do you like Mack?”
“He’s fine. It’s hard to know how to feel about him after all this, to be honest.”
Sabrina took another bite of salad and pushed it away. “I’m finished with this, I think. At some point it all just starts tasting like rabbit food, you know?” Katya nodded. “So, wait. Are you writing a story?”
Katya shrugged. “Thinking about it,” she said. “Trying to figure out if there’s a there there. Gathering string, as they say.”
“Got it,” Sabrina said. “Well…I should get back to the office. And if you are working on a story…let’s not do this again, okay? I can’t help you with it. There’s just too much”—she gestured in the air—“stuff. You know?” She gathered up her salad bowl and utensils and stood. “I’m going to walk back, but I think we probably shouldn’t walk together, so would you mind just waiting a few minutes before you leave?”
Katya wasn’t sure what she had been hoping to get out of this conversation—maybe some big revelation like “I always knew Mack was an ass, he sent me dick pics too!”—but whatever it was, she hadn’t gotten it. “Yeah, sure. Hey, listen—do you think you could give me your number?”
Sabrina looked at her, head tilted, as though contemplating what it would mean for Katya to have her number. She sighed. “Okay. Here, let me find a pen.” She started digging around in her bag.
“I’ll just text you right now, and that way you’ll have my number too.”
“Oh—right. Of course.” She took out her phone and told Katya her number. Five seconds later, there was a message notification that just said Katya. Sabrina nodded. “Okay. Got it. I guess I’ll see you?”
As soon as Sabrina left, Katya got out her phone. Didn’t know abt Mack/Isabel, Katya typed into her Notes app. But didn’t seem to think it was that big a deal? Or didn’t want me to think she thought it was a big deal. Sabrina might be a tougher nut to crack than she’d expected.
15
Living on the Edge