Spirit Witch (The Lazy Girl's Guide to Magic #3)

I trudged away, turning everything over in my mind. The sensible thing to do would be to tell the Ipsissimus, the Order and the police and wash my hands of the entire affair. I’d already done what was required of me.

I’d barely turned the corner when my mobile phone rang. Half expecting it to be Winter, I pulled it out of my pocket. When I realised the number calling me was my home phone, I felt my pulse rate increase.

‘Eve?’ I asked. ‘What’s wrong? Is it Brutus? Is everything alright?’

There was no immediate answer. Frowning, I tilted my head and listened harder. Was that heavy breathing? Trepidation building, I tried again. ‘Hello? Eve?’

‘Fooooooooooooood.’

I frowned. ‘Brutus?’

‘Fooooooooooooood.’

Since when had he learned to use a damn phone? ‘Brutus,’ I said slowly. ‘Where is Eve?’ A horrible thought struck me. ‘You’ve not … done anything to her, have you?’

‘Bitch.’ Whether he was referring to me or to Eve wasn’t clear. It was probably to both of us for not pandering to his every need. There was a long drawn-out pause. ‘Where?’

I was glad no one else was around to realise that I was conducting a phone conversation with my cat. I’d been talking to Brutus for years but even I felt ridiculous doing this. ‘I’m in a place called Weymouth, tracking down a serial killer. This is serious stuff, Brutus. I think we’ll be back later today but I can’t promise anything. This is a fast-moving investigation and I am an integral cog in it.’ I hesitated. ‘But I really don’t want to be. I want to be back at home. And not just because I’d quite like to lie on my sofa with you and a family-sized bar of chocolate. I’m not cut out for this, not because it’s work but because it’s too emotional. I’m not sure I can cope. But a serial killer is out there and other witches might be in danger.’

‘Home,’ Brutus said with more than a hint of imperious command. It was more like a smack-you-in-the-face-before-bringing-you-to-your-knees imperious command.

‘Believe me, that’s what I’m planning to do.’

There was a strange clunking sound in the background then I heard Eve’s muffled voice. ‘Brutus? Princess? What is that smell?’

My eyes narrowed. What smell?

‘Miaow,’ Brutus said. Then he hung up.

I ground my teeth. Why, that little… I hissed under my breath. Every moment he got, he complained. Goodness only knew how he was treating Eve or what the smell was that she was referring to. If he thought he was getting his Friday tuna treat now, he was sadly mistaken. Although at least now I was thinking about something other than Clare Rees and her family. I had a sneaking suspicion that Brutus had somehow known how I was feeling and had called me to take my mind off things, but that was crazy. Then the phone rang again and, without looking at the screen, I answered.

‘Brutus, how on earth can you get your paws to dial the number?’ I asked. ‘And what is that smell Eve was talking about? Have you been peeing in the corner?’

‘Certainly not,’ Winter said. ‘I used the toilet and I even put the lid down afterwards.’ He paused for a moment. ‘Has Brutus been phoning you?’ he enquired. ‘That cat is bloody amazing.’

That cat is bloody annoying; I think that’s why I love him. I shook my head in exasperation and changed the subject. ‘I think that Blackbeard sent Clare’s parents a postcard and pretended it was from her. He was desperate that no one knew she’d disappeared.’

Winter’s answer was grim. ‘Unfortunately that’s what we’re discovering as well. The police have agreed to the embargo, not least because steps have been taken to conceal the disappearance of the other coven members too. And all their houses are booby-trapped in exactly the same manner as Clare’s. Blackbeard means serious business.’

I grimaced. ‘There’s more.’ I told him about Tarquin visiting the Rees’ family.

Winter drew in a breath. ‘How does that boy manage to sneak his way into everything? And why?’

‘He has a particularly annoying and peculiar skill set,’ I agreed. ‘We need to talk to him.’

‘Agreed. We should also see if we can get hold of your friend Iqbal. He has proved himself incredibly helpful in the past when it comes to research. The way that Blackbeard is managing to avoid magic concerns me. If anyone knows how he’s capable of that, it’ll be Iqbal.’

‘It sounds like we need to skedaddle back to Oxford.’

Winter agreed. ‘The police and Arcane Branch have everything under control here. It’ll take some time to defuse all the traps because they’re trying to do it quietly so that Blackbeard isn’t alerted.’

I ran a hand through my hair. ‘He’s not just one step ahead of us, Rafe,’ I said quietly. ‘He’s several miles in front. And we both know that I’m no runner.’

‘It’s not just you on his tail, Ivy, or me. Between the Order, the coven’s families and the police, we’ll catch this bastard before the week is out.’

Winter was trying to sound confident but I knew him too well. Both of us were feeling the strain – and the doubt. Maybe Blackbeard was just too good. And if his only clear motive was to kill witches, where could we go from here? There were thousands of witches across the country and Blackbeard could be targeting any of them. Talking to the dead was all well and good, but so far the ghosts had only proved helpful in offering glimpses into the past. We were all going to have to step up our game.

***

We made it back home in record time. It was a measure of how seriously Winter was taking things that he didn’t comment after I magically encouraged several cars to come to mysterious halts so we could overtake them and get back that little bit quicker. Using magic against vehicles could play havoc with their engines but none of them exploded, so I decided my spells were a resounding success.

Winter wasn’t the only one being encouraging. More than one ghost waved enthusiastically as we zipped past. I suppose I should have been cheered by all this support from the dead but I wished they’d leave me in peace.

Winter bounded up the stairs to Tarquin’s flat while I waited for the lift, explaining that I should probably make sure that Brutus wasn’t gnawing on Eve’s cooling corpse. When I stepped out onto my floor, however, I could already hear Winter’s barrage of questions from the floor above.

‘What were you doing in Weymouth? How did you know the Rees family? Did you speak to Clare? Have you been annoying Ivy again? If you do anything to set back her recovery even slightly, I will serve your head up to my cat on a platter.’

I smiled at the last part. Given the anger rippling through Winter’s voice, not to mention Tarquin’s propensity for being the most irritating witch this side of the yellow brick road, I decided I should join them and make sure no blood was spilled.