Paige grins. “We’re amazing.”
“I’m so happy for you. He’s a great guy. I totally approve.”
The combination of Paige, aka Jessica Rabbit, and Jared equals one hell of a power couple in the looks department. Add to it their stellar personalities, and it’s a match made in heaven.
“Look at them, they’re trying so hard to look manly in front of us and here we are finishing our cocktails and barely looking at them,” Paige says with affection. “The bartender is definitely favoring the female clientele. At this rate, they’ll never get us another round.” She chuckles. “Come on, let’s join them at the bar.”
My phone vibrates in my purse and I grab it out to see a text from Grant. Taking a deep breath, I open it up.
Grant: Be safe.
That’s all he wrote. There’s a war going on in my head. One side is pissed that he’s inserting himself into a space he has no business being. I’m a big girl. This is my time. I’m trying to move on and he’s making it impossible. The other side is soaring at the fact he cares and is concerned about me.
I shove my phone back in my purse, refusing to deal with Grant. Fuck him. He chose this. We spend the rest of the evening drinking and laughing. Every now and again my mind turns back to Grant and sadness bubbles up inside me that I never experienced before with anyone. There’s something about Grant that pulls me toward him, but I can’t allow my mind to go down that path. I try a bit harder with Ryan.
It’s been a week since my date with Ryan. He asked me out again, but I turned him down. It just didn’t feel right to lead him on. At this point, I’m in no place to start dating again. Besides, work demands too much of my time.
My desk overflows with work that still needs to be completed, but before I can dive in my phone rings. I’m not surprised to see it’s Paige calling.
“What’s this I hear about you not seeing Ryan again?” she asks.
“Wow! Not even a hello.”
“I don’t understand. You had an amazing time. He really likes you,” Paige says.
I groan. “He’s very nice, but I don’t think he’s my type. I don’t want to lead him on.”
“What exactly is it about him that’s not your type? He’s charming and thoughtful. I think he’s perfect for you. Plus, he’s gorgeous. The two of you would make beautiful babies.”
“Babies!” I shout and then remember where I am and quickly lower my voice. “I think you’re getting a bit ahead of yourself. Look, Paige, he’s very nice and, yes, he’s very cute, but I just don’t feel it.”
“Why don’t you go out with him one more time? You might find you actually do like him.”
I laugh. “Why are you forcing this? Just because you and Jared are so happy doesn’t mean I need a boyfriend too.”
“I don’t know. I guess it would be fun. You know, the four of us.” It’s not hard to see she just wants another couple to do the whole double dating thing with. I don’t want to commit because right now it just doesn’t feel right.
“I’ll call you later. I really do have to go. Some of us do work in this office.”
“Funny. I work.”
“You’re doing a bad job, then.”
She laughs and says her goodbye before the line goes silent.
Opening night. The official opening of The L. I smile to myself as I look around the room. I can’t believe it’s finally here after everything I’ve been through. It feels like an eternity.
“I got you a glass of champagne,” Ryan says, pulling me out of my thoughts and handing me my drink.
“Thank you so much.” I smile up at him.
“Thanks for inviting me. This place is insane.” I had no intention of bringing Ryan, truth be told, I didn’t want to lead him on. But I am so happy I did. I let Paige convinced me it would be a good idea and now standing here waiting for Grant to arrive, I realize it is helping . . . a little.
“Right? I’m so proud of what we’ve done. It’s fabulous.”
“There’s a line of people waiting to get in. Is that normal?”
“I don’t know, but I doubt it. The buzz surrounding this place has been crazy.”
I look around at all the people milling about. Smiles are plastered on everyone’s faces. It’s clear The L is a success.
“I see Jared. Let me go grab him,” Ryan says.
“Great idea. I’ll be right here.”
Ryan saunters off in pursuit of Jared. He isn’t even gone a second before I feel eyes on me.
Grant.
Only he can evoke such a reaction from me. It’s been weeks, but the pit in my stomach tells me I’m no closer to moving on. I’ve missed him with every fiber of my being. Not even Ryan’s company can lessen the pain. If anything—and this is the worst part, the part that I’m dreading, the part that makes it so difficult for me to live with myself—I always find myself comparing them, and Ryan is lacking. Not because how deep Grant’s pockets or eyes are, or because of his dirty mouth, devotion for Isabella or even his shark-like business instincts. Ryan is lacking simply because he is not Grant. Only Grant is Grant. And as long as I don’t have Grant, I will always feel hollow. Like my body is empty and light and floating in the world without an anchor. Without a home. It hits me fundamentally. Dumpster Dude is my home. I am, therefore, homeless now. Which is ironic, seeing as what we did—what we worked on—was a hotel. A hotel that is about to accommodate thousands of hearts. Temporarily, of course.
Grant’s gaze is unnerving as he walks my way. Anticipation makes me shiver down to my toes. Time slows and it feels as though it takes hours for him to reach me. When he’s finally standing in front of me, the space between us is heady with unsaid words.
“Hi,” I say. My voice is lame. My posture is lame. God, my whole being is.
His sad eyes roam over my body as if they have permission. “You look beautiful, Bridget.”
I smile but don’t respond to his compliment. If I were to speak, I couldn’t hide how broken I am.
“I miss you,” he adds, the words somehow like a knife. My temporary home. It’s not fair that he says that after we threw away the key.
Silence descends upon us.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” His eyes are dull as if he’s been through a war. I image mine are much the same. His jaw is set hard, holding back words I know he wants to say but doesn’t dare.
We still can’t be together, so what’s the point in punishing ourselves with pleasantries? There’s nothing good that can come of this. Only more heartbreak.
He finally speaks. “Who is he?”
“Excuse me?”
“Him,” he hisses, glaring at someone behind me.
I follow his line of sight until my eyes rest on Ryan. I shake my head and the green of his eyes pierces me. His stare is so hard it shakes me to the core of my being. If it were possible, the heat of his gaze would singe my skin. “He’s no one, Grant.”
“Then why are you here with him?”
I’ve wounded him by showing up with someone else, but what did he expect? The last time we attended one of these events, his wife was on his arm. I wouldn’t put myself through that again. No way in hell.