Callum exhaled heavily before resting his forehead on hers. “There’s so much more outside of the town’s limit, Peyton. You belong out there, experiencing more than what Daylesford offers you.”
Her heart felt like it was being tugged in different directions simultaneously. She peeked up at him through her lashes, Callum’s grey eyes meeting hers.
“I belong here,” she said.
I always thought I belonged to you. Not this town.
He pulled away and nodded. “Then let’s give Oscar and Marissa a wedding they’ll never forget and get the hotel the recognition it deserves.” Then Callum dropped his hands from the pier, turned, and made his way off it.
“Callum,” she called out as she watched him leave.
He stopped and, without hesitation, faced her. Peyton stood at one end of the pier and Callum at the other, separated by planks of nailed wood.
“Yeah?” he asked, digging his hands into his pants pockets.
“I’m sorry that I kissed you.”
He looked at the ground that met the first plank of the pier before he looked back up at her. “Don’t be, because I’m not. We just can’t let it happen again, Peyton. Want to head back to the hotel and go through those plans?”
She didn’t feel anything. Finally, years of hoping and wishing had finally paid off—Peyton no longer felt. And to her disappointment, it wasn’t as satisfying as she had imagined. Rather, it left her longing for more.
“I can’t wait till we leave this place, Pey. Just wait until we start a life together out there. No matter where we are or where we go, you’ve claimed me. My life makes sense when I’m with you.”
Peyton rolled onto her back as she let memories of him keep her awake. She brought her fingers to her lips, missing the way that he felt against her. It had been a rookie mistake to kiss him, but inside her, something had snapped. She’d hated the way that he’d blamed himself for Jay’s behaviour and her actions. There had been no logic, just the desperate need to take all the self-blame away from him.
“We just can’t let it happen again, Peyton.”
And it couldn’t. It was bad enough that he was back; kissing him made it all the more complicated. He’d said that he could only offer her now and sometimes, nothing close to forever. The tension had been so thick when they’d returned to the hotel; she was almost drowning in it.
Peyton let her hand fall back onto the pillow and kept her eyes on the pendant light as she continued to replay today in her head. A day that made her question what tomorrow would bring. After what had seemed like forever, the tension had started to dissipate. Somehow, they’d found a comfortable moment when they’d discussed the wedding. With some adjustments to her original plan, the dance floor by the lake was feasible. All it needed was redesigning, and Callum offered to do just that. The moment she said, “Okay,” to him, he picked up the design, said he had to leave, and walked out.
The moment the bell rang to signal his departure, Peyton was thankful. She couldn’t take being so close to him, hating the fantasies of what could have been that bubbled up every time she looked at him. She was finally alone to breathe. But each time she thought about them kissing on the pier, she ended up more frustrated than before.
After being left alone with her thoughts, Peyton realised that she didn’t want to hear from him after he left. She didn’t want to hear about how he had found love and found happiness. She didn’t want to hear about how another woman had ended up with the man Peyton had always seen as her happily ever after. But she knew deep down that she wanted to hear about this woman and thank her for making Callum happy. That’s what her heart wanted.
Peyton turned on her side and stared at her phone on the bedside table. Taking a deep breath, she picked it up and rolled on her back again. With a firm grasp, she held the phone in front of her face and unlocked it. Then she found Callum’s number, not even sure if it was the same as it was four years ago. She swore she felt and heard her heartbeat pound in her eardrums as she opened the screen to type a new text message.
She let out a breath of air as she hovered her thumbs over the touchscreen. She knew she shouldn’t do it, but she was fighting an internal battle of want and need. The same battle between protecting her heart and freeing it. But the fight with herself didn’t take long as her thumbs began to type for her.
Peyton: Are you awake?
She pressed send and immediately regretted it, wishing she could recall it back. She prayed that she had the wrong number. A second after pressing send, though, she got a reply.
Callum: Peyton?
She looked at his message. She knew she shouldn’t reply, but she wanted to speak to him in any form she could get. To say she was confused hardly described what and how she felt.
Peyton: It’s me.
Callum: How’d you know I still have this number?
Pure luck and hope.
Peyton: I thought I’d tempt Fate.
Callum: To answer your earlier question: Wide awake.