“Don’t you fall in love with him, Peyton. Don’t you do that to me.”
Jay’s words had been hard to ignore. The walk from the pub to the hotel had had her constantly replaying it. He had never said anything so deep before. He’d sounded desperate, and it left an ache in her chest. She loved Jay, but only in the most platonic of ways.
“He isn’t. Your friend’s wedding isn’t for another month,” Peyton said, reaching for the papers on her desk. She opened the right drawer of the desk and placed them inside. When she closed the drawer, she noticed Callum staring at her, as if he were trying to figure out the cogs of her mind.
“I’m here for you, Peyton. I came back for you.”
The way his voice softened had her heart beating faster. Words that would have been perfect…four years ago. So instead of letting him see the effect those two sentences had, she let out a short laugh. His jaw clenched as well as his fist.
“You loved me once, Peyton… You fell in love with me. Why don’t you believe me when I say I’m back here for you?”
The hurt in his grey eyes made it hard for her to breathe.
He never told me he loved me. He never said it back.
“So what, Callum? I’m just meant to fall in love with you? Is that it?”
Callum’s eyes glistened and he shook his head. “I wouldn’t let you, Peyton. It would be the last thing I’d let you do… I’m not that cruel.”
What?
The unsaid apology swept his eyes. His words made no sense to her. Callum looked to his left, not saying any more. His faraway stare was one she didn’t understand.
Just as she was about to ask him what he’d meant, Callum turned around and made his way to the door.
“Wait,” she said, getting up from the chair.
Callum stopped just steps away from the exit.
“What do you mean you wouldn’t let me?” she asked.
He didn’t face her. Peyton stared at his back, hoping he would look at her.
“I wouldn’t let you fall in love with me. That’s not why I’m here. I don’t ever want you falling in love with me, Peyton Spencer. I’ll make sure that you don’t. I’m just here for forgiveness for not being there for their funeral. I don’t want your love. I don’t need it. I just need to know that you forgive me and then I’m done. I’ll be satisfied with the choices I made.”
With that, Callum walked out the door, leaving her with tears in her eyes.
“I’m sorry for your loss, Peyton. If you need anything, just give me a call.”
The voice sounded like Father Mitchell, but Peyton didn’t say anything. Instead, she kept staring at the plaques that marked her parents’ graves.
“They were good people,” another voice said.
“No daughter should be left alone in this world. It’s a shame.”
Tears fell down her cheeks as she read their names again and again. More voices of people giving her condolences surrounded her. Callum had left her, and now, both of her parents had, too. It became difficult to breathe as she remembered the last thing her parents had said before they’d driven to the city for a tourism convention. It was about getting over Callum. Her mother had told her to “forgive and forget,” and now, Peyton couldn’t. Not anymore. There wouldn’t be forgiving. He hadn’t shown. The one time she believed he’d come back, and he hadn’t.
She let out a sob. He hadn’t even said goodbye to her parents. She’d called his phone to tell him about the funeral, but he never called back. Her voice message hadn’t been much. She’d just told him that her parents’ funeral would be in Daylesford and that she’d like it if he could make it. Let the past be the past. But as she stood there on the soft ground, she knew she’d made a mistake by calling him. He didn’t care. She hated him more than she could have ever thought.
Ignoring the person offering their condolences, Peyton walked towards the exit, past the old graves, past the office and the sign that read ‘Daylesford Public cemetery.’ For a moment, she heard Graham call after her, but Peyton ran. She didn’t care that her lungs were burning. She kept running.
She didn’t stop when she reached the lake. Instead, she kept going down the lane of bare trees and the small hill that led to her street. When Peyton reached her house, she heaved, trying to regain air in her lungs. She paused for a moment as she stood in the middle of the street. On her left was her parents’ home, and on her right, Callum’s. His parents had shown, but he hadn’t.
She looked back and forth as tears continued to fall and memories flashed in her mind. The moments she’d run across the road and into his arms, her parents telling her to be home by ten. The moments she’d snuck out of her bedroom window to be with him. The moment they’d kissed under the cherry blossom tree.