‘You’d better not be planning any holidays abroad,’ I muttered to Winter. I tilted up my chin. ‘So it’s settled then. Adeptus Exemptus Winter and I stay within five miles of each other and neither of us leaves Oxford. You compensate me for my future lack of earnings and in one hundred days’ time, the spell is removed.’
‘And you work with him.’ The Ipsissimus addressed Winter. ‘It’s not ideal but as long as she tags along during all investigations and occasionally helps you with your Arcane work, the terms of the binding will be met. Your forbearance is greatly appreciated but we know you will rise to the challenge. You can learn a great deal from training someone so … complex.’
Complex? My eyebrows shot up. ‘Er, excuse me. I’m not working with him. I don’t want anything to do with you lot.’
The Ipsissimus took on an expression of great sufferance. ‘You will.’
I crossed my arms. ‘No. I won’t.’
‘When you left the Order—’
‘When I was expelled.’
A tiny vein bulged in his forehead. ‘When you left the Order, we decided that it would be prudent not to take further action against you, Ms Wilde. You assaulted a fellow Neophyte.’
Now it was my time to twitch. ‘What’s your point?’
‘We can still bring charges against you.’
I met his eyes; the good ol’ Ipsissimus wasn’t bluffing. I shrugged. ‘Go ahead. What’s the worst that could happen?’
‘You end up in prison for up to five years.’
Oh. ‘I doubt the Order would want the negative publicity,’ I said calmly. ‘It wouldn’t look good having a young Order member behind bars.’
‘That was certainly the case eight years ago. But you’re no longer a fresh-faced teenager.’ He consulted a sheet of paper in front of him. ‘You’ve been driving taxis.’
‘It’s an honest profession.’
‘Indeed.’ The Ipsissimus rubbed his chin. ‘You’ve had several complaints brought against you for refusing to drive customers long distances. You only put in the minimum hours required. In the time since you left the Order, you’ve essentially achieved nothing. You’re hardly a paragon of virtue. I don’t think many people would have sympathy for you.’
My bottom lip jutted out. ‘I don’t think that’s fair! I’ve achieved a great deal since I was expelled.’ I leant forward slightly. ‘I once won five hundred pounds on a This Morning phone-in competition. And not many other people can say they’ve never missed an episode of Enchantment.’ I felt Winter shift beside me. He was probably jealous.
‘We are not amused, Ms Wilde,’ the Ipsissimus said.
‘If I work with him,’ I said, jabbing a finger in Winter’s direction and making him stiffen dramatically, ‘I’ll end up causing more problems than I solve. A hundred days isn’t that long. Give the poor man a holiday. He certainly looks like he needs it.’
‘He’s a very important member of the Arcane Branch and has a high success rate. We have no desire to lose him for three months because of a mix-up in the paperwork.’
‘If I go to prison, you’ll still lose him.’
‘Perhaps. But we’ll also gain considerable satisfaction in return.’
Well, at least the Ipsissimus was honest. I thought about it; maybe prison wouldn’t be so bad. I wouldn’t have to cook. I could spend my days lounging around in a cell. It could be restful. Somehow I doubted it, though.
‘What about Eve?’
‘What about her?’
I rolled my eyes. ‘This is her dream. It’s not her fault she’s not here and I’ve been flung into her place. She’ll be gutted if I’ve taken her spot.’
‘We will find her a commensurate position, I assure you.’
They’d better. There had to be some way to get myself out of all this that didn’t involve prison scrubs.
‘Oh for goodness’ sake,’ Winter hissed. ‘You don’t have to do anything. Just follow me around and occasionally comment or file some paperwork.’
The Ipsissimus looked stern. ‘We invoked the binding because you don’t work well with others, Adeptus Winter. This will be good practice for you for the future.’
‘We all know she doesn’t have the skills to do anything anyway,’ one of the seated Order bigwigs said. He didn’t make the slightest attempt to lower his voice. I glared nastily at him. He didn’t flinch. That’s when I knew I’d fall into line. There was a part of me that was incandescent with rage that they thought I was weak and useless and had no magic of my own. It was only a glowing ember of anger rather than a burning inferno – but it was enough.
‘Fine,’ I snapped. ‘I’ll do it.’
The Ipsissimus nodded as if that was what he’d expected all along. ‘Excellent. Then we are done here. For obvious reasons, we shall do what we can to keep this … mistake quiet.’ He stood up. A heartbeat later, Winter propelled me out of the room as if my presence were contaminating the air and had to be removed.
It took fewer than three steps after the door closed behind us before I began to regret my words. ‘Well, that was stupid,’ I muttered. Right now, a hundred days felt like a life sentence.
‘I’m glad you’ve realised that,’ Winter said. ‘You’re lucky to be given a second chance with the Order. If you do well, you might even be welcomed back as a Neophyte.’
I resisted the temptation to kick him sharply on the shins. ‘That’s not what I meant, Adeptus Exemptus Winter. I meant it was stupid that I caved in.’
‘You’d rather go to jail?’ he enquired.
It didn’t matter what I said; he wouldn’t understand. He obviously believed that the Order was the best thing since non-stick cauldrons. I elected not to answer. Instead I huffed along, my hands in my pockets and my shoulders slouched. ‘I want to go home now,’ I said distinctly.
Winter regarded me for a moment. ‘Fine. I’ll stop off and pick up the basics for you to get started and I’ll take you back. I’m sure your sofa is missing you.’
Sarcasm? ‘The next three months are going to be so much fun, Adeptus Exemptus Winter,’ I responded.
His mouth tightened. ‘You don’t have to keep calling me that.’
I held up my palms. ‘Oh no, you said that’s how I have to address you so that’s what I’ll do. I’d hate to go against Order protocol. Maybe I should add in a curtsey at the end of each sentence. What do you think?’
‘That’s enough,’ he growled.
Good. I was getting under his skin. I was going to make him regret this for every minute of the next hundred days. Him and the rest of the damned Order.
***
I waited outside the Supply Office while Winter went in to get what I supposedly needed to trail after him like a forlorn puppy. A collar and lead, perhaps. Or I’d get lucky and he’d pick up some treats to make sure I sat like a good girl and gave him a paw when he needed it. Whatever. He could carry all that stuff around if he wanted to. I wasn’t going to help. Unfortunately, electing to stay in the corridor wasn’t a good move. I wasn’t left alone to enjoy the temporary peace for long.