She's Not There

Caroline ushered the girl into her living room, resigned to their presence. Maybe having them around was a good thing. Maybe it would force her to be more objective, less emotional, not allow her desire for a happy ending to overtake her common sense.

“Let me have your coat,” Steve offered. “Don’t think you’ll be needing that in here.” Lili unbuttoned her coat and slipped it off her shoulders, handing it to Steve. “I’m Caroline’s brother, by the way,” he said, draping the heavy coat over the banister and taking the small overnight bag from her hand before following the rest of the group into the living room. “And this is Caroline’s mother, Mary, and her daughter, Michelle.”

Lili nodded hello to each of them as they arranged themselves in a loose pentagon around the coffee table, Mary and Steve occupying the two chairs, Lili and Caroline sitting side by side on the sofa, Michelle standing off to one side, leaning against a wall, hands across her chest, studying Lili as if she were an alien being.

Caroline was also staring at Lili, trying to uncover the one genetic detail that might prove whether or not this was her child. But there was nothing she could point to conclusively. She looked for a gesture, a nervous tic, a common family mannerism, but there was nothing. Just a pretty girl with Hunter’s jaw. Was that enough?

“Did you have a good flight?” Caroline asked her.

“It was okay. A little turbulent.” Her voice was deeper than it had been over the phone, closer in tone to her own. Did that mean anything?

“Are you hungry? Can I get you something to eat?”

“I’m not hungry. Thank you.”

For several seconds, nobody spoke.

“So,” Steve said, breaking the silence, “you really think you’re Caroline’s long-lost child?”

Caroline held her breath, waiting for Lili’s answer.

“I wouldn’t have come if I didn’t think there was a chance.”

“And now that you are here?” he pressed. “Do you like what you see?” He motioned around the well-appointed room.

“Steve, please…”

“I don’t want your things,” Lili said.

“She hasn’t asked for anything,” Caroline told her brother.

“Not yet,” Steve said.

“How did you pay for your plane ticket?” Michelle asked. “I thought you didn’t have any money.”

Lili glanced down at her lap. “I charged it to my mother’s credit card.”

“Lucky girl, having so many mothers to choose from,” Michelle said.

“Does she know you’re here?” Caroline asked.

“I left her a note saying I’d be gone for a few days, telling her not to worry.”

“She’ll be going out of her mind,” Caroline told her, reliving her own panic when she realized her daughter was missing. “You should call her.”

“I will. Later. After we know for sure.”

“And when will that be?” Steve asked.

“When they get the results back from the DNA test they’re planning to take,” Michelle said, pushing herself away from the wall and heading for the hallway. “If you’ll excuse me a minute.”

“Where are you going?” Caroline asked, but Michelle didn’t answer.

“How do you go about taking a DNA test?”

“I’m not sure,” Caroline said. “I’ll ask Peggy. She’ll know.”

“Peggy?” Lili asked.

“Friend of Caroline’s,” Steve answered. “She was there the night my niece disappeared. Tell me. Do you remember anything about that night at all?”

Lili shook her head.

“She was two years old,” Caroline reminded him.

“I wish I could remember something,” Lili said. “I’ve tried. But I can’t. The first thing I remember is playing with one of my dolls and one of its legs breaking off. I was probably three or four.”

“Do you remember where you were living then?” Caroline asked, recalling that Lili had said they’d moved around a lot.

“Rome, I think. My father owned an import-export business that had offices all over the world. We were always traveling.”

“And when did you first suspect you might not be who you thought you were?” Steve asked.

Caroline was actually grateful that Steve had taken over the questioning. She didn’t trust her own voice, and his questions allowed her to focus on the girl’s reactions.

“Like I told Caroline on the phone,” Lili said, glancing briefly in Caroline’s direction, “I’d always felt as if I didn’t quite belong. I don’t look anything like anyone else in my family and our interests are so different.”

“In what way?” Michelle asked, returning to the room, although she remained in the doorway.

“Well, my brothers are real jocks, and I’m not.”

“Not particularly shocking,” Steve said.

“They’re not really interested in school. And I love it. Especially math.”

A slight groan escaped Caroline’s lips.

“How convenient,” Steve said.

“Convenient?”

“You’ve undoubtedly read that my sister is a math teacher.”

“Yes. That’s one of the things that made me suspect…”

“And the other things?”

“I’ve already discussed this with Caroline.”

“Discuss it with me.”

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