—
They returned to their room at four o’clock, having seen no one who even remotely resembled Samantha. By four-thirty, it was already growing dark. By five, the only light came from the streetlamps along Stephen Avenue Walk and the television across from the beds on which they were sitting. The TV was on CNN: a disgruntled man in North Dakota had gunned down his boss and six coworkers after being fired from his job earlier that afternoon. “Maybe we should order room service,” Caroline said, turning on the lamp and reaching for the menu, almost knocking the phone off its hook. She stared at it, as if willing it to ring. But it remained stubbornly silent.
“I’m not really hungry,” Michelle said.
“We haven’t eaten all day. You have to have something.”
“I said I’m not…Fine. I’ll eat. What are my choices?”
Caroline scanned the menu. “They have steak, hamburgers, prime rib…”
“Really, Mother? Prime rib?”
“You used to love prime rib.”
“I haven’t eaten red meat since I was twelve years old.”
“You need protein…”
“I don’t eat meat.”
“How about fish? They have a tuna melt.”
“Tuna smothered in cheese. No, thank you.”
“What about a BLT?”
“I don’t eat bread.”
“For God’s sake, Michelle…”
“Look. Just order me a bowl of fruit.”
“They have milk shakes.”
“Are you kidding me? Am I a child?”
“I don’t know. You’re certainly acting like one.”
“Why? Because I like what I like?”
“You don’t like anything.”
“I like sushi. Do they have sushi?”
“No. And maybe you’re eating too much raw fish. You’ll get mercury poisoning.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, would you just stop?”
A phone rang.
“My God,” Caroline said.
“Relax,” Michelle told her. “It’s my cell.” She reached into her purse and pulled out her cell phone. “It’s Dad,” she said, glancing at the caller ID.
“Don’t answer it,” Caroline urged.
“Yeah, right. Hi, Dad.”
“Don’t tell him where we are.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry I haven’t called. I’m in Calgary with Mom.”
“Shit,” Caroline said, listening as her daughter explained to Hunter where exactly they were and what they were doing there.
“No, I’m not kidding.” Michelle held the phone toward her mother. “He wants to talk to you.”
Caroline shook her head, refused to take it.
“He’s pretty upset,” Michelle said, returning the phone to her purse minutes later. “He wants you to call him.”
“He’s not my husband anymore. I don’t have to talk to him if I don’t want to.”
“Now who’s acting like a child?”
“Are we ordering dinner or not?”
Michelle snatched the menu from her mother’s hands. “Fine. I’ll have the house salad, no dressing, just a wedge of lemon, and a spinach and parsley smoothie, no yogurt.”
“Sounds yummy,” Caroline said, rolling her eyes and relaying Michelle’s order to room service, along with her own order of a steak with fries, a side salad, a slice of cheesecake, and a large Coke. Not that she wanted any of it. She just wanted to make a point. Although she was no longer sure what that point was.
“Just so you know, I’m sorry about the way things turned out,” Michelle said at the end of the mostly silent meal. “I was hoping she’d at least have the decency to call.”
“Me, too. Thanks for coming with me, for being here.”
“Well, I couldn’t very well let you come alone.”
Caroline reached across the portable table the waiter had set up to pat her daughter’s hand, but Michelle’s hands were already moving toward her lap. She wanted to ask what was going on in Michelle’s life, how she really felt about Hunter’s new baby, if she was dating anyone special, if she’d decided whether or not to return to school, if she had any idea what she wanted to do with her life, but she was afraid to disturb this moment of guarded peace. “Peggy tells me you’re doing a great job at the hospice,” she said, choosing the safest option.
Michelle shrugged. “I don’t do all that much.”
“She said you have a real way with the patients.”
“We don’t call them patients. We call them residents.”
“Oh.”
“Patients are waiting for a cure,” Michelle explained. “Residents are waiting to die.”
Caroline took a moment to absorb the casual distinction. “That can’t be easy for you.”
“The court didn’t give me a whole lot of choice, did it? Do you believe in God?” Michelle asked in the same breath.