She found her voice and, as calmly as she could, said, “I want justice, D-Dad.” She wanted to be strong, but her resolve was beginning to crumble.
“Justice.” He shook his head. “I don’t know you anymore, Lucy. I don’t understand you. At first I was desperate for answers, but now we have peace. Real peace. Don’t destroy it.”
“I made my decision, Dad. I’m sorry you don’t agree, but I have to do this.”
“You don’t have to do anything. This is family, Lucy. Your family. Maybe you’ve forgotten … you rarely visit, you live your own life. I understand, you needed to get away after … after everything. But you’re not the little girl I raised. How you can talk to me about murder so … coldly. You’re acting like this is a job, not our lives. Justin was family. Your family. My grandson was not a victim, not a number, but our flesh and blood.” Tears clouded her father’s blue eyes. Tears she had put there.
Do not cry. Do not cry.
“For me—for your mother—I’m asking you. Do not do this. Let Justin rest in peace.”
He wasn’t asking. He was telling her.
“I’m sorry, Daddy.” She could barely speak. She had never seen her father like this … broken, tortured, angry, and so deeply sad.
She stood up, she didn’t have anything else to say.
“If you go through with this, Lucy, you can’t come back here. I have to protect my family as best I can.”
Protect my family. Am I not your family, too?
“You’re disowning me like you disowned Jack?”
“That’s not fair. These are completely different situations. I’m not disowning you. That’s ridiculous—I love you, you’re my daughter. But I don’t want to hear anything about Justin or his murder, I don’t want you talking to your mother about it. Carina or Connor are not going to help you. I don’t understand how you can hurt your family like this. We’ve stood by you no matter what, and that counts for nothing?”
“I understand.” Her voice was unnatural and stiff. “Good-bye.”
She walked out.
Her father didn’t try to stop her.
Sean was still in the kitchen with Connor, Julia, and Carina, though no one was talking. Her mother was nowhere she could see, but Lucy couldn’t look for her now. As soon as Sean saw her, he was at her side.
“Let’s go,” she said.
Sean took her arm and they left.
Carina and Connor didn’t say a word.
“Lucy,” Sean said as he pulled away in the rental car, “what happened?”
“I’m not welcome home as long as I’m investigating Justin’s murder.”
They drove in silence for several minutes. Then Lucy said, “Why am I doing this, Sean? Three hours ago when I left Maxine’s hotel room, I couldn’t imagine not finding this killer. I feel like I already know her, at least on the surface.”
“You’re better than me—I don’t know that anyone really knows Max.”
“No, I meant the killer. I’m getting there, I’m getting into her head.”
“You said her—you think the killer is a woman?”
“I need to talk to Dillon, I don’t know how he’s going to feel about what I’m doing here, he might have the same reaction as everyone else. But Dillon, more than anyone, will see the big picture—I’ll make him see it.” She needed someone on her side. Someone who didn’t look at her with such pain and heartache. “Dillon will see that another little boy will die if we don’t find this killer. And they will continue to die, every few years, until we stop her or she’s dead. But … I might lose my family.”
“You won’t, Lucy.”
“Jack didn’t talk to our dad for more than a decade after their … disagreement.” Such a light word for what had happened. “Jack told me about it, though I don’t think he’s discussed it in detail with anyone else. It’s complicated, but in a nutshell … Jack disobeyed orders for what he believed was a moral reason. My dad covered it up, thinking he was helping Jack avoid a court-martial, and reversed Jack’s actions. People died, Jack blamed my father, and my father blamed Jack. They couldn’t forgive each other for a long time. Their relationship has never been the same.”
“Jack’s a grown man. They’re both stubborn. You’re not.”
“If I’m not stubborn, why can’t I just walk away?”
“Because some psychobitch is killing children and destroying people’s lives. If she kills again, it’s not on you. I know that, you know that, the world knows that, but I also know you—and you won’t be able to sleep if you don’t do everything in your power to stop her. To prevent another family from suffering like your family.”
Sean understood. That gave her the strength she needed to finish what Max Revere started.
“Your family may never agree with this decision, but when you find the killer, they’ll understand.”
“I hope you’re right.” She paused. “You said when I find the killer.”
“Lucy, if there’s one thing I know about you is that you don’t give up. You don’t back down when things become difficult or dangerous. If anyone can figure out who killed Justin and those other boys, it’s you.”
She took Sean’s hand. “I love you so much.”
“Right back at you. No matter what, Lucy—if you need me here, I’ll be here. You will tell me, right? No secrets. No trying to hide what’s bothering you. I will jump in my plane and fly back, day or night.”
“Knowing you would do that gives me strength.” She kissed his hand. “And I promise, Sean, no secrets. If I need you, I will call.”
Chapter Fourteen
FRIDAY
Lucy woke up when Sean slid out of bed. She moaned. She hadn’t slept well. Surprise, surprise.
“Go back to sleep,” Sean said.
She looked at the clock. “It’s seven. I need to get up. We’re not on our honeymoon anymore.” She rose at six in the morning when she was working. Seven was almost decadent.
“We’re going to honeymoon for the rest of our lives,” Sean said and kissed her.
She sat up in bed and stretched. “Andrew arranged for Max and I to interview retired detective Don Katella this morning. I still have more reading to do.”
“Think she’ll play by the rules?”
“We’ll see. She was quiet last night when I saw her, which was fine with me—I didn’t want to talk about what happened with my family.”
“What did you tell her?”
“The truth, they don’t want to be involved. I didn’t need to share details.”
Sean sat next to her. “If Carina and Connor give you a hard time, let me know.”
“I can handle them.” Sean was protective, and he was much closer to Jack and Patrick than he was to Carina and Connor. She didn’t want any more conflict in her family—she’d created enough. Something like this could divide the family. She didn’t want anyone to have to choose sides.
She considered what had really been bothering her when she couldn’t get to sleep. “I lied last night.”
“About what?”