See What I Have Done

He shook his head, an earthquake. ‘I wouldn’t make that mistake again.’

I walked closer and we watched each other. Father blinked. I felt a twist in my heart and my body turned arctic. I considered everything. ‘I wish it could be different. But it won’t,’ I told him.

Father looked at me, eyes wide, confused. I wondered what Emma was doing. I missed her. ‘Everything will be better when Emma comes home,’ I told him. The ceiling popped and ice ran the length of my spine. The clock on the mantel ticked ticked and I began to feel warm, warmer.

How old he looked there on the sofa with his white hair and white beard; I saw how different we were. I wanted to ask him, ‘Can you tell me one more thing?’

‘Yes, Lizzie. Anything.’

‘Can you tell me something from when there was only me and Emma and Mother and you?’

‘Once, there was love. All love.’

‘Yes. All that love. Once.’ I smiled. A father returned.

I stepped closer to him, heard birdsong in my ear. This was the beginning of my happiness. I would show him that I could finally love him more.

‘Lizzie?’ Father’s voice was loud.

I nodded. Father’s eyes widened and he grunted a little, words becoming stuck to the side of his mouth. He began crying, I didn’t know this was possible, and for a moment, I felt confused. I stepped closer to Father, said, ‘All that love, once,’ and he cried some more. The clock on the mantel ticked ticked. I folded my body all the way down to his, kissed him on the head. He cried. ‘It’s alright,’ I said, my angel voice.

Birdsong was loud in my ear and happiness was about to begin. Above me, the house opened up, just like I had always wanted it to. I felt the sun come for me, wanted Father to see it.

‘Look up!’ I said. ‘Look up.’

Father did. I watched his hands, saw the golden circle on his finger. I smiled. The sun burned bright. He shielded his eyes with his hand.

I knew he was waiting, just like I was. Waiting for all my happiness. Together we closed our eyes. I lifted my head towards the sky, everything is magical! I want to touch the sun!

I raised my arms above my head.





Fall River timeline


13 September 1822: Andrew Jackson Borden is born at 12 Ferry Street, Fall River. He is the eldest of five children.

19 September 1823: Sarah Morse is born. She is the eldest of nine children.

21 January 1828: Abby Durfee Gray is born.

1833: John Morse is born.

1845: 92 Second Street is built. It is designed to house two families.

25 December 1845: Andrew marries Sarah. He is a cabinetmaker, she is a seamstress.

1 March 1851: Emma Lenora Borden is born.

3 May 1856: Alice Esther Borden is born.

10 March 1858: Alice dies at home from ‘hydrocephalus’ (commonly known at the time as ‘dropsy on the brain’).

19 July 1860: Lizzie Andrew Borden is born at 12 Ferry Street, Fall River.

26 March 1863: Sarah dies of ‘uterine congestion’ and ‘disease of spine’. She is thirty-nine. Andrew is forty. Emma is twelve. Lizzie is two.

On a certain date: Andrew meets Abby at Central Congregational Church, Fall River.

6 June 1865: Andrew marries Abby. Abby is thirty-seven years old. Andrew is forty-two. Emma is fourteen. Lizzie is almost five.

1866: Bridget Sullivan is born in County Cork, Ireland.

1875: Lizzie goes to high school.

1877: Lizzie leaves high school in her junior year.

24 May 1886: Bridget arrives in New York on the SS Republic.

1887: Lizzie stops calling Abby ‘Mother’.

1 October 1887: Andrew sells Emma and Lizzie 12 Ferry Street, Fall River, for $1 as a gift and as an attempt to soothe tension in the household. As owners of the house, the sisters will collect rent and make an income.

November 1889: Bridget is hired as a servant at the Borden household.

21 June–1 November 1890: Lizzie takes her Grand European tour. She is gone for nineteen weeks.

24 June 1891: Daylight robbery takes place at 92 Second Street. Lizzie, Emma and Bridget are at home. Andrew never pursues an investigation. It is believed that he suspected Lizzie committed the crime.

End of June 1891: Both indoor and outdoor doors are kept locked at 92 Second Street at all times.

End of June 1892 and 10 July 1892: Uncle John comes to visit.

15 July 1892: Because 12 Ferry Street was always in dire need of repair, Lizzie and Emma actually made a loss on the house (that is, they couldn’t ask for higher rents from tenants). They sell it back to Andrew for $5000.

21 July 1892: Emma goes to Fairhaven.

3 August 1892: Uncle John comes to visit.

4 August 1892: Andrew and Abby are murdered.

6 August 1892: Andrew’s and Abby’s funerals are held; 2500 people gather in the immediate vicinity of 92 Second Street.

11 August 1892: The bodies of Andrew and Abby are exhumed and autopsies are performed. The heads are removed, retained as evidence. Lizzie is told she is the main suspect of the murders and is taken into custody just before seven pm.

12 August 1892: Lizzie is taken to the jail located in Taunton, Massachusetts. She is refused bail.

17 August 1892: The decapitated bodies of Andrew and Abby are buried once again.

5 June 1893: The trial begins.

20 June 1893: Lizzie is acquitted. She spent ten months in jail leading up to and while the trial was held.

Twenty days later, 1893: Lizzie and Emma buy 7 French Street, Fall River. Lizzie names the house ‘Maplecroft’.

Early 1905: Emma abruptly leaves Lizzie and Maplecroft. The sisters never speak again. Lizzie begins to call herself Miss Lizbeth A. Borden. Emma takes on an assumed name until her death.

1906: Emma travels abroad. She visits Scotland.

1 June 1927: Lizzie dies of pneumonia. She is sixty-six years old.

10 June 1927: Emma dies of chronic nephritis. She is seventy-six years old. The sisters are buried side by side at Oak Grove Cemetery in the family plot alongside Andrew and Abby.

1948: Bridget dies in Montana.





Last will and testament excerpts


Lizzie, 30 January 1926

Section 1. ‘To the city of Fall River the sum of five hundred dollars, the income therefrom to be used for the perpetual care of my father’s lot in Oak Grove Cemetery in said Fall River.’

Section 28. ‘I have not given my sister, Emma L. Borden, anything as she had her share of her father’s estate and is supposed to have enough to make her comfortable.’

Emma, 20 November 1920

Section 1. ‘I give and bequeath to the treasurer of the City of Fall River . . . the sum of one thousand dollars ($1,000) . . . IN TRUST, the income thereof to be used and applied for the perpetual care and improvement of the family burial plot, and the monuments and stones thereon . . . which was owned by my father, Andrew J. Borden, at the time of his death.’

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