She knew a little something about that. “Not your fault,” she whispered.
“Maybe not, but that I accused you of talking out of turn most definitely is my fault. Christ, Lily, I’m an idiot. A damned sorry idiot. My mom came clean and told me what happened, that it was her doing the talking—which I think you know.”
She bit her lower lip, not about to throw Char under the bus.
Aidan gently stroked his thumb over her lip. “But even when I threw it in your face,” he said softly, “you never said anything. You protected her.”
“She’s your mom,” Lily said, just as quietly. “She’s so worried about you guys, and she didn’t mean to let loose state secrets.”
He nodded. “I know. But that you knew it and never repeated it, not even to me, speaks volumes about who you are. So you think about that, Lily, the next time you tell me you don’t know what to do with family. Because you know exactly. It’s about loyalty and kindness and unconditional love, and you are more than capable of all that.”
She remembered what Rosa had told her. Seems to me if Aidan was asking, that’s better than nothing, right? Maybe he wanted to make sure. Or maybe he just wanted to hear how you feel about him. I mean, I know we think we’re obvious with our feelings, but we’re not.
“Neither of us is all that good with trust,” she said now. “I get that.”
Aidan shook his head. “Don’t let me off the hook so easily here, Lily. I don’t deserve it. I came into the salon furious, and I took it out on you because—”
“Because we’re both head cases?” she asked.
He let out a short laugh. “Yeah, but I hurt you.” His voice softened. “I’m so sorry for that, Lily.”
“Well, I had it coming from you,” she said, backing away from him, needing some space.
He leaned back against the door like he was too tired to stand on his own. “And how do you figure that?”
“When I ran out of here ten years ago, I hurt you.” She took another step back.
“Sorry,” he said, mistaking her movement. “I did shower.” He sniffed himself. “Sometimes it takes two or three showers to really get rid of the smell, but I was in a hurry to get out of the station.”
And he’d come straight here.
“I don’t mind it,” she said quietly, and she didn’t. He worked his ass off, putting himself on the line, in danger, and he did it without hesitation.
He was one of the bravest men she’d ever met.
And that terrified her. But he already knew that. He wasn’t quite as emotionally stunted as she, who managed to keep everything bottled up inside, locked down tight, never to be let out and shared. It was a special talent of hers, one she was someday going to learn to fix if it killed her.
But probably not today.
“You busy?” he asked, looking around.
“Yes.” She had a date with a box of cookies and Supernatural season eight, but that was on a need-to-know basis.
“All right, I’ll make this quick.” He met her gaze. “About us.”
“I didn’t sleep with Lenny,” she said. “I was sleeping with you.”
“I know—” He broke off. “Was?”
Oh, yeah, it was very past tense in her book, no matter the fact that even now her eyes were soaking him up, wondering how fast she could get him naked.
Bad eyes.
“Lily—”
“No,” she said, and held up a hand to hold him off, because she was weak when it came to him, very weak. So she spoke fast. “I need you to know that I can’t sleep with two guys at the same time. I just …” She shook her head. “I’m not equipped for it. Hell, I’m barely equipped for one man at a time.”
“That’s not what I—” He blew out a breath. “I know you didn’t sleep with Lenny. I know you didn’t talk about the resort’s business. I had a seriously dumbass moment and I’m here to ask you to forgive me for being that dumbass.” He reached out and pulled her into him, still leaning against the wall. He set his hands on her hips and dipped his head to press his face to her throat, which was really freaking unfair because she loved when he did that.
“I do forgive you,” she agreed, struggling to think. Not easy, since he’d slid his mouth to the underside of her jaw now and was nibbling his way to her ear, which set off a whole bunch of reactions. “But this still doesn’t change anything,” she managed, her hands on his shoulder, her fingers digging in. “You actually thought I could sleep with someone else when I was sleeping with you.” And just saying it out loud made her mad all over again.
“I said I was a dumbass, right?” he asked. “Complete dumbass. One hundred percent dumbass. Ask any one of my siblings, they’ll vouch for that.”
His mouth was at her ear now, his breath warm against her skin, and her eyes drifted shut as her hands clung to him. “It’s not that simple, Aidan.”
He pulled back and looked at her. “So you’ve forgiven but … not forgotten? Is that it?”
“Look, it’s not like you’re the only dumbass in the room,” she said, and grimaced. “I have a lot of dumbass tendencies when it comes to you as well.”