He took them and started ripping strips immediately, doing this with his bare hands.
I didn’t watch Tommy’s strong hands tear the towels to shreds. Strong hands I knew could be gentle and sweet.
Tommy was off-limits to me. We’d both learned that the hard way.
I looked to Green.
“Done, Liv. You won’t see me again,” he said when I caught his eyes.
That hurt. I liked Green.
No.
Loved him.
I loved all my boys.
I never told them this. That wouldn’t do. I was a Shade, but that wasn’t all there was to it.
I’d learned. I didn’t allow myself to show emotion.
Ever.
I still knew my boys knew it. I went to bat for them. I protected them. I did the best I could for them. And I didn’t hide it.
So they knew and the look in Green’s eyes, his concern, wasn’t the first time he didn’t hide he felt that back.
“But I gotta eat, babe,” he repeated as explanation.
“I understand, Eli,” I replied.
Green stared at me a moment before he shook his head.
“That…that right there states plain this is not the business you’re meant to be in,” he declared.
I drew in a breath to speak but Green kept talking.
“Your sister’s not as dumb as your old man. She knows, you lead their soldiers, we’d all march over a cliff for you. She’s got a * tastes like sugar and acid in her veins. Men’d do a lot for sugar but they eventually learn to steer clear of acid since that shit burns and leaves scars that never go away.”
Again, on Green’s comment, I avoided Tommy’s eyes.
This time, Green did too.
He also kept speaking.
“So she gave you to us. You give a shit. You let that show. You treat us like family. Keeps us motivated. Keeps us devoted. But not a single general in an outfit like this should let a soldier go with an, ‘I understand, Eli.’”
I knew that too.
“You want her to put a bullet in your brain?” Tommy asked and Eli looked to him.
“She couldn’t do it. But you’d do it for her, all she had to do was ask.”
“You’re right,” Tommy replied.
“And she’d never ask,” Green returned. “And that’s why we’re all totally fuckin’ devoted. Just like you,” Green said to Tommy and looked to me. “But we’re not dumb, Liv. All a’ us gotta eat.”
I said nothing.
“You should put a bullet in my brain,” Green whispered.
That was a warning.
I felt Tommy’s eyes come to me.
But I held Green’s.
“I’ll never do that,” I whispered back, hoping he’d take my meaning that he shouldn’t burn any bridges. Instead, he should disappear.
“That means you need to get far away, Liv. This life’s gonna eat you alive.”
I felt Tommy’s intensity.
But I had only one answer for Eli.
“It already has.”
I watched anger flare in Green’s eyes as his mouth went hard.
Tommy tied the bloody towel to Green’s thigh before he shifted, shoving a broad shoulder under Green’s arm to heft him up.
Green grunted.
I took them in, giving them both a nod before I moved quickly to Dad’s desk and grabbed the receiver from the phone.
I hit a button and turned to watch Tommy and Eli make their slow way to the door.
Gill answered on the second ring.
“Bring the car around, will you, Gill?” I requested. “Tommy and Green are on their way.”
“You got it, Liv,” Gill replied and disconnected.
I put the phone back in the cradle and saw the boys had disappeared out the door.
I took a moment to look around my father’s office, not knowing why because I’d memorized every inch of purple damask-papered wall, every etch in the heavy, dark wood, every swirl in the silk rugs that cost so much entire villages in developing countries could live on it for years.
I did this thinking Green was gone in more ways than one. If he was stupid, which I hoped he wasn’t, he’d go to Valenzuela or Sloan. He’d offer his services. He’d offer information.
If that happened, Dad would make the order.
Georgia would have it carried out.
Gill would do the deed.
If he was smart, he’d get out of Denver and find work elsewhere.
Then Dad would forget him and my sister would offer her sugar * to whatever green recruit she’d make promises of living large, drowning in Cristal, fucking on soft beds covered in greenbacks.
It wouldn’t take long before the fresh one would learn.
We had very few soldiers left and all of them were uneasy.
Except Tommy.
Because of me.
And Gill.
Because of Georgia.
Green was right.
I should get out. I should get away. I should go to Thailand. Bali. Any end to this earth where he wouldn’t find me.
I didn’t because I knew that place didn’t exist.
Vincent Shade had lost nearly everything his father stole, dealt, stabbed, lied, tortured and killed to get.
But there were two pieces in the chess game he played very poorly, a game that just happened to be our livelihoods, pieces I’d learned without a doubt he’d never lose.
Not ever.
His girls.
Chapter Two
She’ll Have Company
Olivia
My phone was ringing as I drove into my garage.