He held her gaze. “All I was saying was that I fucking miss you, Lucy, and the first thing I want to do when I see you is wrap you in my arms and kiss you stupid. But I get it. We aren’t even together and it’s wrong of me to want that, especially with Angie being there. You’re right, it’s just hard. I get that you’re upset and I’m sorry, but stop throwing Angie in my face. I know you have a kid, and I adore your kid. So, yeah, I’ll respect your boundaries. Just know it’s fucking hard, but I’ll respect them.”
Why was he so great? And why was it becoming really difficult to keep her heart locked up? She swallowed hard as she looked down at her lap. If she was honest, what he said was what she wanted. She missed him so damn much, which was just dumb and irrational on her part. Like he said, they weren’t together. They were just talking. But that night together, wrapped in his arms as he bestowed those kisses on her had spoiled her. The fact he called her beautiful any chance he got had also fueled her need to see him in person, but that was insane. And the way he was with her when she was being a fucking bitch was award-winning. But they were just talking.
Weren’t they?
Letting out a long breath, she looked back at the phone to find him watching her. “We’ve only been talking a week, Benji—”
“It feels like years,” he said then and her lips quirked.
Because it did.
Their conversations were awesome, and she was having so much fun talking to him. They liked so many of the same things, and while he was a big nerd, she was starting to think she might be one too. She loved all the same movies, she loved hockey, and she loved crossword puzzles. Like him. They just clicked, but something was still holding her back.
And it scared her.
She finally found someone she liked and who got her. She could complain about the shop, her job, anything, and he would listen. She didn’t talk about Rick because she just didn’t like to talk about him, but she was sure Benji would listen. The big thing was Angie, though.
“I just worry about Angie. I don’t want to bring anyone around her and have her get her heart broken. There is only so much Ben & Jerry’s, and I’m not fighting my kid for it.”
Benji smiled, moving his hand through his hair, pushing it to the side. “Let’s get one thing straight. No matter what happens between you and me, I will always care about that little girl. I can promise you that. She and I were friends before you and me.”
Lucy rolled her eyes. “I know, but it’s just different. I’m guessing you haven’t dated anyone with a kid before which is why you don’t really get it.”
Something flashed in his eyes and he shrugged. “I get it, Lucy, I do.”
“So you’ve dated someone with a kid?”
But he shook his head, his lips pressing together. “Not really, but then I really don’t date.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, I’ve tried, but no one has really stuck.”
This was the first time they had really talked about their pasts. Well, his past. Her past pretty much involved Rick and only Rick. Biting her lip, she looked up and shrugged. “I haven’t been with anyone since Rick.”
“Yeah, so we are both trying to navigate through this. It has to mean something that neither of us has found anyone who matters until now.”
She grinned. “Who said you matter?” she teased and he grinned.
“You know I do.”
“Maybe.”
He rolled his eyes. “The thing is, I don’t want to do any navigating with anyone but you, and I will respect what you want. I will. Just stop throwing that kid card up at me and stop saying this won’t work. Give it a chance.”
She swallowed hard as she moved her hands down the front of her skirt. “What is this?” she asked, and as soon as she said it, she wondered why it mattered. Why did it need to be labeled?
Looking up at him, she was breathless as his lips curved. “Something spectacular. Just give it a chance, okay?”
Lucy smiled as she nodded. “Okay.”
“Good,” he said, letting out a long breath. “We good?”
She met his gaze and couldn’t help but grin. He looked so delicious and sexy, and while it bothered her that he had a way with her, she actually appreciated it. It felt good that he respected her but was quick to put her in her place. Lord knows she was a little bit of a bitch. Okay, maybe a lot of one, but with him, it was different. She didn’t feel as bitchy.
“Yeah, and I’m thinking that, next week, when we go on our date, I want you to take me back to your house.”
His eyes widened. “For what?”
She giggled. “You know what.”
“The sex?” he said so seriously, his face made of stone, and Lucy couldn’t handle it.
He was a nut.
Giggling uncontrollably, she leaned back, her stomach hurting as he watched her with a grin. Catching her breath, she sputtered with laughter. “Yes, Benji, the sex.”
He nodded, a smug look on his face. “I like the way you think, Sinclair.”
“Well, be ready because I’d take you now if I could,” she admitted, her body catching on fire for his. It had been six days too long, and while it should worry her that she was craving him like a smoker craved a cigarette, she couldn’t help it.
She wanted Benji Paxton.
Bad.