It’s that country—the skirmish, the quagmire, any noun seems more appropriate than war—that showed her who Huck really is. She’d known, all along, that he was important, but they’d been insulated by their youth and unbothered by whatever it was Sarah’s papa was writing up in his fourth-floor office. The summer after graduation, at a smallish gathering at Huck and Lulu’s (twenty guests instead of a hundred, sitting around the dining table instead of milling about with plates), Lauren met the man who’d run Iraq on behalf of—well, whom, exactly was not quite clear. Everyone knew, of course, about the looting, the disbanding of the army, the banishment of the political class, the missing millions: It had all, every last bit of it, been a disaster, though if you’d happened in, helped yourself to some of the spinach samosas, which were delicious, you’d never have known it. Handshakes and warm embraces, smiles and Hermès ties, updates on the kids, in law school, at Goldman, and promises to meet up in the Vineyard later that summer.
Her parents had voted for Reagan once upon a time, but her father was vocal on the many children who had, in fact, been left behind. Talk of the war was everywhere, that year they finished school. The subject had come up, to her great dismay, at Poughkeepsie’s best restaurant, reservations secured two months in advance, the whole clan gathered to celebrate graduation. Her mother had insisted Lauren invite Sarah, who remained focused on her pappardelle while her dad railed against the administration. They did not know—or if they did, they did not learn it from Lauren—the extent of Huck’s reach in the world. And Lauren had learned, from watching Sarah, that it was best to simply pretend that current events had nothing to do with real life.
That was, in essence, the takeaway from her expensive education: You are either the sort of person who shapes society, or the sort of person whose life is affected by the shape of society. She wonders if that’s what her parents had hoped for when they decided to ship Lauren off to school in the city. The idea came from the Doctors Khan (Mohammad and Anjali) whose combined practice her mother had been managing for almost two decades now. The Doctors Khan represented the very highest standard of being in her family’s household: as hardworking as they were well educated, sensible despite their financial security (they drove to work together, a Toyota station wagon, used), and savvy in the ways of a culture to which they hadn’t even been born. It was Anjali Khan who had explained to a dumbfounded Bella Brooks that enough parents were willing and able to pay the full near-thirty-thousand-dollar tuition that ample money was left over to ease the burden for those parents who couldn’t swing it. Bella, Dr. Khan thought, owed it to herself and her children to look into this.
Mike and Bella Brooks deemed the small indignities of life as a scholarship parent worth what was gained in exchange: visions of impressive extracurriculars (an archaeological dig over spring break!), college acceptances, graduate degrees, financial liberty. Before the sixth grade, Lauren had delivered straight As across the board, a matter more of competence than brilliance, though no one would figure that out for many years. So she went to the school, the special school, the well-endowed school, the sought-after school, and came out six years later as much a stranger to her parents as Grace Chang was to her Fujianese fishmonger father and seamstress mother. Grace had gone off to Harvard, naturally, then on to Columbia, and worked in the city government. Lauren has seen her on television.
The cumulative effect of the cool air and a longer-than-necessary walk: She’s cold. It’s one of those nights Lauren wishes she could take her brain from her skull and rinse it off. The day—its complaints, the celebrity chef—sticks to her, and there’s the attendant guilt—if this job is so silly, so meaningless, how can she let it affect her this deeply? What did her own mother do, when she was Lauren’s age, with a toddler and newborn at home? Did she sigh this same kind of sigh, did her shoulders slump in precisely this manner? Lauren looks like her mother, and they share mannerisms, as happens in families; she’s recognized it, the way they say hello on the telephone, the way they cross their legs, the way they rub the backs of their heads when they’re tired, and there’s probably more. It’s hard to observe yourself. She showers, the warmth returns slowly to her body, and she tries to picture her mother, imagine what she’s doing at that very moment, Wednesday, a little after 7:30, October well on its way, the air cool and dry. Is she in the house, reheating something for dinner? Is she at the Khans’ office, catching up on paperwork? Is she stuck in traffic, is she auditioning for the next show at the community theater, is she volunteering and delivering meals to shut-ins, is she grocery shopping, is she taking the car in to be serviced, is she on her way to the dentist, did she stop at the library after work, is she meeting Lauren’s dad for an early movie? Lauren has no idea.