Our friendship was better because of our love. Our love was better because it blossomed out of friendship.
“You need some muscle,” I told him after a few minutes of watching him work. “Step aside.” I used the flat of my hand against his shoulder to push him over to wedge myself above the engine where he’d been showing me what he was doing.
After a few seconds, I loosened the cap he was struggling with and also flipped a few other things open and pulled out a bad sparkplug.
“See?” I held the plug up with one hand and patted his cheek with my other. “I think Mr. Magazine Cover is turning into a pretty boy.”
Drew slapped my hand away. “Asshole.”
I laughed and went back to work. The garage was dim because there was only one overhead light and the sky outside was darkening quickly. The rainstorm added an extra gloomy quality to the light, but it wasn’t a hindrance. We were two guys hunkered down amongst tools and greasy food. Just the two of us without the outside world to bother with.
A little while later, my hands were dirty and the scent of oil filled the air. Both our heads were bent low and a bare bulb was lit and clipped to the underside of the hood, giving us some much-needed extra light.
I felt Drew move slightly, his elbows hitting the edge of the car. “So this is what you had in mind for dinner tonight?”
I moved back and grabbed a nearby rag to wipe off my hands. “Do you need more romance, Forrester?” I teased.
“Do you?” He wasn’t teasing. Slowly, Drew pulled back, propped a hip against the car, and crossed his arms over his chest.
I watched him closely, trying to hear what he hadn’t said. “Why would you think that?”
He shrugged. “You’re not the best talker, T. That’s cool, but I don’t want you sacrificing your own happiness for mine.”
I dropped the rag on the workbench and stepped closer, mirroring his position. It hit me in all the soft spots. He was asking if I was happy like he was worried I wasn’t.
As if I could be anything but happy with him.
“All I want is who we are.” I gestured between us. “Burgers and fries, engines, bad jokes, and maybe you beside me in bed at night.”
“That’s all?” He tilted his head.
I nodded. “But if you need more separation… like more friend time and more… person time, then I’m down. Say the word. I’ll even get you some flowers and pretend I’m nervous when I pick you up at the door.”
I’d totally be nervous. But he didn’t need to know I was serious. But joking aside, this was something I needed to know. I thought the way we blended was perfect, but what if he didn’t feel the same?
“Flowers?” He cocked an eyebrow.
“You can be the girl in the relationship.” So maybe I wasn’t done joking. On the outside anyway. It helped cover some of the nerves bunching low in my belly. Even though we made it past a lot of hard parts, it didn’t mean any of this was easy. It might not ever be. But some things in life were worth the struggle.
He laughed and shook his head. The blue of his eyes sparked with amusement, and I relaxed a little. “You know how I feel about labels, frat boy.”
“My bad.” I pretended to be sorry.
Drew chuckled and rubbed a hand over his face. He had some grease smeared on his fingers. I thought about snatching his hand and cleaning it up for him. “I don’t want you to think I’m ashamed of you. Of us.”
I stiffened, and although I didn’t make a sound, I still heard a low whistle in my mind. That was a heavy sentence to drop. It blew up all traces of jokes and sarcasm. “I don’t think that.”
He glanced up, held my eyes. I liked the way we’d grown together. How once we skirted around the way we felt, ran from our thoughts. Now we looked each other in the eye and dealt with it.
“I had some time to think today.”
I nodded so he would continue.
“You noticed how I reacted when everyone looked at us when we came downstairs, how my instinct was to pull away. I haven’t told my father, my brother, or Gamble.”
“Drew—” I started, but he cut me off.
“You’ve been shouldering our relationship alone. You got attacked for it. You faced the frat and when you told the family you were gay. You. Not me. You probably wouldn’t have told them about me at all if I hadn’t spoken up. Would you?”
Slowly, I shook my head. Of course I wouldn’t. That was his decision to make. I’d never take something like that out of his hands.
Drew pressed his lips together before continuing. “You’ve kept me out of it. You’ve been shielding me.”
“And I’ll keep doing it. There’s no timeline on this. There’s no rule that says you have to spring out of the closet and shout our relationship to the world. You don’t have to declare we’re dating. You don’t have to hold my hand in public. You don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for.”
“I called Ron Gamble before you got here,” he said.
I jerked upright. “What?”
“I asked for a meeting. I’m going to tell him.”
“If you’re doing this because you somehow think I want you to…”