Renegades (Hotbloods #3)

“Then I will do as you’ve asked, Your Highness,” he said, his voice low. “My loyalties lie with you. I am a soldier, and I will do my duty.”

“Good,” Queen Brisha remarked. “Those who are on my list will receive details of their mission soon. Your training is complete for today. Return to your homes, refresh yourselves, and expect word to come. Be prepared. This is one of the most important missions you will ever undertake, and you do it all in my name. I thank you for your service,” she said solemnly, before striding out of the room, her entourage in tow.

Navan and I looked at one another, not knowing what to say.



After changing out of our training uniforms and stowing our weapons, we took our time returning to our chambers, neither of us speaking on the walk over. His hand held mine, but we had no words. Even though it looked like Pandora was otherwise engaged with the queen’s newfound focus, there was no telling who might be listening. And so, we said nothing until we were back in the safety of our room.

“I don’t want you to go,” I said, as soon as the door was closed. “It’s too dangerous. You’ll end up dead, and I can’t cope with that.” Tears pricked my eyes, and I gripped his hands, afraid to let go.

He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear. “I’ll be fine, Riley. I promise you, I will come back, and everything will be okay.”

I shook my head. “I’ll be sitting here, sick with worry, until you come back through those doors,” I murmured, looping my arms around Navan’s neck. He held me, holding my gaze as I stared into his slate eyes.

“I’m just worried about those poor civilians,” he said, a sadness creeping into his eyes. “There has to be a way we can reduce the fallout.”

“We can think about that tomorrow,” I said. “Right now, I just want to commit as much of you to memory as possible, to give me something to focus on when you leave,” I urged, holding his face in my hands as I leaned in to kiss him. It was a desperate, urgent kiss. A goodbye kiss.

His hands ran up my spine as the kiss deepened, his tongue exploring my mouth, his fingertips searching every contour of my skin. I shivered in anticipation as he lifted my shirt over my head and cast it to the floor, his kisses trailing down my neck and across my collarbone, moving downward. I gripped him tighter, pressing against him, wanting to feel as much of him as possible, in case I never saw him again.

He lifted me up, and I wrapped my legs around him as he carried me over to the sofa and lay me down on the soft cushions, the fire roaring beside us. Grasping for the edges of his shirt, I practically tore it off him and sent it flying to the ground, reveling in the delicious friction of his skin against mine.

We were both reaching for the buttons of each other’s pants when a knock ricocheted through the room like a gunshot, making us freeze. Not knowing who it might be, but fairly sure we didn’t want to get caught in this situation again, we scrabbled for our clothes, throwing them back on as fast as possible.

More or less fully clothed, Navan approached the door and opened it cautiously, while I crept up behind him, wanting to see who had disturbed what might have been the greatest night of my life. To my shock, Queen Brisha was standing in the hallway, a stern expression on her face.

“I have further news to impart,” she said, eyeing us curiously. We were still out of breath, and Navan’s hair was a mess.

“What can we do for you, Your Highness?” I asked, trying not to pant.

“It’s about the mission,” she explained. “I’ve changed my mind.”

“Changed your mind, Your Highness?” I felt dizzy with relief at the thought that Navan wouldn’t have to leave—that he wouldn’t have to fight.

“I have decided that you should also go on the mission, Riley,” Queen Brisha stated, shattering my hopes.

Navan opened his mouth to object, but the queen interrupted. “If you say a word against my decision, I will banish you both to the farthest reaches of this realm.”

“I’m not questioning your authority, Your Highness, but… why? Why must you do this?” Navan asked, clearly dumbfounded.

The queen’s gaze flickered between the two of us, and I saw the jealousy in her eyes. “This is because of you, Navan. I want you to know that. She would have been safe, if you had not spoken out of turn,” she spat, her face twisting into a bitter mask of contempt. “I expect you to be there when the rest of the soldiers leave. If you aren’t, I will track you down, and I will end you both.”

It almost brought me to tears, to see Queen Brisha like this. Where once our love had inspired her, now it embittered her. As she turned and headed for the elevator, I felt regret twist in my stomach. More than anything, I wished I had told her that Bashrik hadn’t reciprocated her feelings, so I might have spared her the pain she felt… and the suffering she felt it necessary to inflict upon us.

It wasn’t Bashrik’s fault, and it wasn’t her fault. It was mine. I had broken her heart by not telling her the truth, and I knew the crazy things people did when their hearts were in pieces. I wished I could put it back together again for her, though that was the hardest task in the universe. A heart, once broken, was never the same again.





Chapter Nineteen





Word came at dawn, via a holographic message that flickered to life in our chambers. I was already awake, not having been able to sleep after Brisha’s unexpected visit. After the news, neither Navan nor I had felt like resuming what we’d been up to before she interrupted. Instead, we curled up in each other’s arms and struggled to drift off. Eventually, I had given up, choosing to just lie there with his arms around me, enjoying the closeness while I had the chance. I was getting better in training, but I was nowhere near ready to enter a real-life mission. If it came to blows, I just hoped I could keep up—and not get Navan killed.

The message told us to meet around the back of the palace in an hour’s time, at the tunnel entrance where we had first entered Brisha’s queendom. It added that we should wear civilian clothes beneath our military fatigues, though it didn’t go into detail as to why. With that, it cut off, leaving me to the turmoil of my own thoughts.

I had gotten so used to this part of Vysanthe that it felt strange to be going back to the South. Plus, the circumstances of our return weren’t exactly great. All I could think about were the civilians who might lose their lives because of us. This was not what I’d signed up for. I didn’t want to kill anyone. I didn’t want anyone to die because of me.