“Oh, shit,” Katie mumbles.
“Damn, I wish she hit for my side,” Louise says, and right now, I wish I did too; it has to be less complicated.
“You will not put yourself in danger, mujer!” he demands, his eyes dark and alive with energy. I shouldn’t be turned-on, but shit, I am.
“I wasn’t! But if I wanted to, I would! This fight belongs to me. The shit done to me and Katie was just that: done to us. Not you!”
“The fuck it wasn’t!” he growls.
“It wasn’t!” I insist.
“My life was just as fucked up, querida, and if I want to make sure that you don’t fucking disappear on me again, then you will follow my damned orders and stay in one fucking place! Christo! You would think you’d want to keep yourself safe for Gabby, if nothing else. Or did you forget our daughter?”
“Of course I didn’t!”
“Then why wouldn’t you do everything you could to make sure you’re safe so you can be there for her? For me?”
“Damn it, Skull.” My frustration is starting to ebb. I’m not even sure why I jumped on him so quick, except that with Skull, I seem to react first and think later. I realize he’s just worried about me. It’s just that I can’t take being another man’s prisoner, even if he’s doing it to protect me.
“If that’s not enough, querida, why can’t you take care of yourself for the child inside of you? Mierda! It shouldn’t be so hard to get you to think. I’m not…”
“I’m not pregnant!” I interrupt him, his words making something twist inside of me. My hand goes to my stomach.
“You fucking could be! Or don’t you remember begging me to fill your pussy up the other day?”
“Oh, shit,” Katie whispers.
I find the chair behind me and sit back down. We had sex without protection. We had sex without protection a lot. My hand goes to my stomach. I couldn’t be… could I?
“We didn’t use a condom,” I admit, holding my head down.
“Exactly,” Skull says, but he’s not yelling now. I can’t look at him; I’m busy staring at the floor.
“You haven’t been using a condom at all,” I whisper, trembling.
“I haven’t,” he states matter-of-factly.
That makes me drag my eyes back to him. He’s standing there giving nothing away, and I have to know. I keep my hand on my stomach, not looking away from him.
“You did it on purpose,” I whisper.
“Absolutely,” he states boldly.
“Oh, fuck.” This comes from Torch, but I don’t take my eyes off Skull.
“Why?”
“Because you’re mine. Your smile is mine. Your laughter is mine. Your motherfucking tears are mine, Beth. Your mouth is mine and your lips are mine. Your pussy is mine and the babies you give birth to are mine. They will always be mine and if I have to keep you knocked up from now until you’re eighty fucking years old so that you’re tied to me in every fucking way I can manage … then by God, mi cielo, I will. You’re not leaving me. You’re never leaving me.”
I’m trembling with everything inside of me now. There’s a lot to what he said. A lot.
“So you’re going to keep me knocked up so I never leave you?” I ask, my voice full of shock, but I doubt he can hear it because it’s barely above a murmur. I don’t have the energy to make it louder right now. There are too many emotions pushing through me.
“If I have to, then yes.”
I swallow, rubbing my lips back and forth against each other while I digest all of this. What do I say? How did I not realize the wounds my leaving him before had caused?
“You do realize I could leave, even if I was pregnant? I could leave if I had three kids or even thirteen,” I tell him, ignoring everyone around us but him.
“You will not leave me again, querida. Where you go, I will always follow.”
“Skull, you need to…”
“You will not leave me again, querida,” he says, and his voice is brutal, but there’s a hint of insecurity in it. His eyes are shining like liquid. My strong biker has tears in his eyes.
“I love you, Skull,” I tell him, trying to reassure him. I stand up to go to him, my legs trembling because of how enormous this whole situation has become. It feels monumental, but I need to fight through it. I need to make him see it.
“You will not leave me. You will not jeopardize yourself again, Beth,” he repeats, and I make it to him. We’re so close, we nearly touch, but not quite. I take him in. All of him. I reach out and bring my hand to the side of his face. I cup it, running the pad of my thumb over the groove by his lips.
“I’m not leaving you again, Skull.”
“Beth…”
“I’m not leaving you again,” I repeat. “I’m staying, and it’s not because of Gabby or because we have more children, Skull. It won’t matter. I’m staying because you belong to me. You’re mine. You’ve always been mine and this time, Skull, I’m free. Completely free.”
“Beth, you can’t…”