“That’s the first meet. You have three more before the day is over, plus Benny. Calm your shit, Boss.”
“I am calm,” I told him, even though it was a lie. And the ache in my chest was proof of that.
*
“What the fuck’s gotten into you?” Benny said, his tone clipped as he sat in his usual spot behind his giant desk.
I smiled at PJ standing next to him, his face completely fucked up.
“Nate! You’re going around beating your own men now?”
“PJ tell you why I was there in the first place?”
PJ’s eyes widened slightly as Benny looked up at him. “No.”
“Jerry called us. Told us to get him out of there. He was running his mouth. Dropping my name. Probably even your name. Telling people our business, Uncle Benny. Frankly, I’m a little pissed you found it necessary to call me in. You deal with your side of The Family. I’ll deal with mine. You shouldn’t have to question what I do. I have my reasons for everything, and you should know that by now.”
Benny sighed and rubbed his jaw. “You’re off the clock, PJ. Take some time off.”
I smirked.
“This is fuckin’ bullshit, Don. I didn’t do—”
Benny cut him off. “Give Tiny your phone and your weapons. Nate will call you when he’s ready. Take the time to clear your head, PJ.” He shook his head. “This is my fault. I didn’t take care of things the way I should have when Pauly died. You should have taken some time to deal with his death. He was your best friend, your brother, and now that pain is carrying into your work. It’s a risk. To you, and to The Family.”
I stood up and feigned boredom. “Are we done?”
Benny nodded.
“I’ll wait in the car,” I told Tiny. “Make sure you get everything from PJ. Phone, computer, all of it. And change his online access. He’s blocked while he’s off.”
“You got it, Boss Man.”
*
“You wanna hang out for a bit?” Tiny asked, hitting the code to open my security gate. “It’s been a while since the two of us just kicked back.”
I thought about Bailey waiting for me inside, and then I thought about Tiny and how he’d react to what Bailey and I were doing. I knew he wouldn’t like it, and I knew the reasons why, but he wasn’t me. He wouldn’t understand. “Um…”
“What? You got plans?”
“Nah, man,” I sighed, letting the disappoint settle. “All good.” He pulled up at the front door and stepped out. “Just let yourself in. I’ll be there in a minute. I need to make a call.”
“Alright, Boss.”
On my phone, I pulled up a page I’d saved earlier and called the gourmet, healthy food delivery service. The shit I’d been feeding Bailey wasn’t good enough. Especially given her recent health status.
The line connected just as a horrible squeal filtered out of the house.
I dropped the phone and bolted out of the car and up the steps to the door.
“Bailey!” Tiny shouted.
She screamed louder.
When I finally got to the door, Bailey had my baseball bat in her hands, beating the shit out of Tiny, who was lying on the floor covering his head. He could’ve fought back, could’ve made her stop, but he didn’t.
I shut the door so her screams wouldn’t be heard and wrapped my arms around her waist, lifting her off the ground and away from Tiny.
“Let me go!” she screamed, swinging the bat anywhere and everywhere.
“Grab the bat,” I told Tiny.
He got to his feet and removed the bat from her hands, the entire time she cried, screamed, and kicked her legs in the air.
“Bailey,” I said in her ear, trying to calm her down. “It’s Nate, okay? I’m here.”
She kicked harder, squirming and trying to pry my arms off her. “Bailey! What happened?”
I looked up at Tiny. “Was she trying to escape?”
“I don’t think so.”
She screamed again, her head shaking from side to side.
“Bailey!”
I brought us both to the floor and held her tight, whispering, “It’s okay,” over and over. Minutes passed before I finally felt her body relax, and then she finally looked up at me, her eyes full of fear. “Nate?” she whispered.
I exhaled a relieved breath and moved the hair from her face. “What happened, Bai?”
Tiny approached with a glass of water and handed it to her. “I think it’s best we let her calm down first.”
She gulped down the water like it was air, her eyes fixed on mine. “You’re okay,” I assured her.
And myself.
She was okay.
My grip on her loosened and I found myself struggling for breath.
“I’m sorry,” she finally said, speaking to Tiny. “I thought you were him.”
“Who?” Tiny asked.
“The man who was trying to break in through the back door.”
My heart stopped, and I looked at Tiny.
“When?” I asked her.
She didn’t answer. Instead, she whimpered, “He saw me, Nate. He looked me right in the eyes. He knows I’m alive.”
*
I splashed water on my face and looked in the mirror of my bathroom. Color had drained from my face, and my pulse had spiked, blood rushing feverishly through my veins. I gripped the edge of the sink and rocked back and forth, breathing through the sharp ache in my chest.
Inhale.
Pause.
Exhale.
Pause.