"Sure it does."
"Not kidding. Smaller problems are a speeding or parking ticket, but big? Yeah, that's when I start wondering where the hell I need to run."
"Maybe you just need a better class of friends."
"I don't have friends. Just you assholes I call family. So what's up?"
"I can't find Kayla."
"What do you mean you can't find her? How long has she been missing?" Black asks, going immediately into cop mode.
My mom is a little crazy in all of the best ways. She wanted my brothers and I to have unique names. Somehow in her nutty head she thought naming us after colors was a good idea. It wasn't.
It didn't help that there were so many of us. One or two names might have been okay, but when you have, Green, Gray, me, Black, Cyan, and Blue… it's not ever okay. In school it earned us the name the Crayon gang, and I don't even want to get started on the hundreds of Crayon jokes we endured.
Black is one of my crazy-ass brothers and one of the ones that I'm closest to. He's also someone who would move Heaven and Earth to help out his family—and that includes Kayla. He's a good guy, if not a bit of a loner, except for occasionally me and definitely my brother Blue. They're twins and are super close in a way I doubt anyone could truly understand unless they had a twin themselves. It's eerie, the way those two are with each other.
"She's not missing. She's at a bar."
"I don't think I understand exactly what you're saying here, White. If you know where's she's at, then what's going on?"
"She's at a bar trying to get laid."
"Ouch, well buddy. She is a grown woman."
“I don’t give a fuck. Hooking up with some random asshole is not—”
“Isn’t that a bit of a double standard? I mean, you do it. Hell, even I do. Fuck, White, I’m pretty sure the whole free world does that shit at one time or another.”
“Not just to get your ass knocked up.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” Black growls.
“Kayla wants a baby, and she thinks the only way to make that happen is to go out and—”
“Jesus, fuck. Does she not watch the news? I thought she was marrying that spineless wonder Tommy Haynes.”
“They broke up.”
"She honestly thought this was the best way to have a baby? I swear to Christ I think this whole world has gone fucking insane. Apparently it's even invading my own damn family, which is fucked up since we're all about three fries short of a Happy Meal as it is."
"Yeah, yeah. Can you help me locate her or not?"
"What do you expect me to do? Put an all-points bulletin on her?"
"Can you?"
"Are you fucking insane?"
"You can tell them that she's wanted in connection for a crime and not to be approached. Have them call if they see her."
"That's a great idea, really."
"I thought so."
"Yeah. It really is. I'll get right on it. I just have one question."
"What's that?"
"Are you going to pay my fucking bills when I get fired for wasting the department’s resources for personal uses?"
"Come on, man. I wouldn't ask. But this is an emergency. I've got to get to her before something happens to her."
"Kayla's always been levelheaded. I don't see her taking unnecessary risks."
"Unprotected sex with someone she doesn't know is a risk, period. And what if some sick fuck hurts her, man? You gotta help me here."
"Jesus. Is she that determined to have a kid? I mean, she's only… what? Twenty something? Surely she knows there's time for her to—"
"She's nearing thirty and she's obsessed with it. You have to help me here. Help me find her so I can just talk her down."
"Fuck, if she's that determined, why don't you just volunteer?"
"Now you sound like Mom."
"Well, normally I'd set your head on fire for a remark like that. Still, I'm serious. Kayla's a beautiful woman and you two have always been extremely close. You can't tell me—"
"Kayla's like my sister," I lie. I might have used that excuse before with Mom, but fuck, what I've been doing at night these past few days definitely has nothing to do with being a brother.
"Damn, that sucks. I always thought the two of you could have something special. I got an idea. Give me a minute to see if it will work," Black says, and I breathe a little easier—at least, if I ignore the knot in my stomach.
I always thought you two could have had something special.
Shit. Has everyone thought of the two of us together? Why haven’t I? Well, until recently, I mean. The idea of Kayla and me in a relationship is laughable… right?
I mean, we’re too different. Except in all the ways that really count.
I don’t want kids. She definitely does.