A different form of betrayal shot through me like a bolt of lightening.
“I’ll call you back,” I rasped then without waiting for a reply, I hung up on my sister, and instantly dialled Aideen’s number into my phone. She answered after the fifth ring.
“Hey, Bran.”
“You knew Kane was goin’ somewhere with Ryder behind me back when you were pregnant and you never fuckin’ told me?” I snapped.
Aideen was silent for a moment then she said, “I’m sorry.”
I wanted to scream.
“Sorry?” I hissed. “You’re sorry? You knew he was goin’ somewhere with Ry and you never talked to me about it! Kane knows where he goes, Dominic and Alec know, too, and none of them talked to me about it!”
“I don’t know though,” Aideen stressed. “I only knew Kane was off with ‘im, but I never actually knew what they were doin’, and I didn’t even cop it until the end of me pregnancy. I was so caught up with fear after the attack and I didn’t even think to talk to you about it. I’m so sorry.”
I swallowed down bile and my sudden rage when I heard the truth in my friend’s words. I remained quiet for a few moments then closed my eyes and said, “I broke up with Ryder.”
There were several beats of silence.
“What?” Aideen almost shouted when she found her voice. “Are you shittin’ me?”
“No,” I replied and reopened my eyes. “I broke up with ‘im, but he refused to accept it, and surprise fuckin’ surprise, he stormed out of the house and I don’t know where he has gone off to. The lads are out lookin’ for ‘im because he won’t answer any of our calls.”
“I can’t believe this.”
I heard the shock in her tone.
I humourlessly laughed. “Welcome to the club.”
“But why?” Aideen asked after a pregnant pause. “Why did you break up with ‘im?”
Wasn’t that the question of the day? I wondered. Why? Why? Why?
“Because I can’t deal with how me life is with ‘im now. I’m on the verge of a break down. I’m so unhappy.”
“Branna,” Aideen breathed. “I had no idea things were this bad. I knew you were havin’ some problems, but I never imagined it was to this extent.”
“Bronagh and Damien said the same thing,” I mumbled.
“Why haven’t you talked to me?” she asked, her tone changing to one of annoyance. “Why the fuck have you been dealin’ with this by yourself? This isn’t healthy!”
“When things started going really bad, you were dealin’ with your surprise pregnancy and Kane, then with Big Phil attackin’ you and your stint in the hospital to recover from that. I wasn’t goin’ to pester you with me problems, and especially not when you birthed that beautiful baby boy of yours.”
“I could fuckin’ smack you!” Aideen shouted. “You’re me best friend which means you’re a fuckin’ priority to me! You bloody well know that, Branna!”
My shoulders sagged.
“I just didn’t want to bother anyone with it,” I said, my voice tight with emotion. “I guess I felt like if I didn’t talk about it, it wasn’t real, you know? I mean, it’s Ryder, and I don’t want to leave ‘im if I can help it. I love ‘im, but I can’t live the way I have been. It’s killin’ me, Ado.”
“Honey,” she breathed. “I’m so sorry. Look, give me half an hour. I’m gettin’ Kane home then I’m comin’ over.”
I wiped away the stray tears that fell from my eyes.
“Don’t you dare, I’m fine.” I lied and rubbed my nose with the back of my hand. “I just had a stressful day at work. We had a code red on the ward and Dominic gave Ash a hard time when he picked me up, then my break up talk with Ryder went completely wrong. I just want to go to bed and deal with all of this tomorrow.”
“I’m comin’ over even if it’s just to sleep with you. I’m not leavin’ you alone when you’re goin’ through this, not a bleedin’ chance!”
I decided not to object because she was right—I needed her. Being on my own wasn’t something that was going to help me, having someone I loved just being there for me would.
“Okay,” I said, holding back more tears that wanted to break free. “You have your key so just come up to Dominic’s old room when you get here. I’ve been sleepin’ in there the last few months.”
Aideen cursed under her breath.
“Okay, as soon as Kane gets here, I’m comin’ over. He’ll probably pack up stuff for Jax and come with me; he won’t let me be alone after everythin’ that’s happened. Dante is in the sittin’ room right now on babysittin’ duty until Kane comes home.”
Aideen and Jax were Kane’s life; of course he was going to make sure they were protected after a twisted human being tried to take them away from him. And there was no one better to watch over them than one of her brothers’ when he couldn’t do it himself.
“I don’t blame ‘im,” I said with a firm nod. “There’s more than enough room here, his room is still his room. We haven’t changed it.”
“Good. Go and get to bed, I’ll be there before you know it. I love you.”