“Has it happened before?” Eden asked.
“That’s what you want to ask me? All the years gone between us and you’re worried about my face?”
“I’m worried about you,” Eden said. “How to make sense of this. You ignored me. You just… what the fuck were you thinking?”
Jenn nodded. She sucked on a cigarette. “Good. Get it all out. Ask everything. Slap me.”
“Someone beat me to it,” Eden said. She jumped up and walked to the sink. She poured a glass of water, drank it, and felt like she could throw up.
“The answer is no, it’s not the first time,” Jenn said. “But it’s the last time. He’ll never touch me again.”
Eden turned and leaned against the sink. “So why now?”
“Because of you. I want to be alive to talk to you. To tell you the truth. To see you as a woman.”
“You gave all that up.”
“I had no choice.”
“You had a choice.”
“If Ripper is okay with taking swings at me… what kind of life…”
“Yeah, right,” Eden said. “I know. What about my father?”
Jenn grinned. Her eyes lit up.
That’s when Eden knew what her mother and father had was real.
“He was amazing. So different. Still ruthless when he needed to be, but so gentle when it came to me. I never had a man treat me like him.”
“So what happened?”
“The club. The cut. The patches. Whatever you want to blame it on. Your father was helping Ripper with some deals. I guess things down here weren’t so hot and he gave up his patches. He was running outlaw. Do you know what that means?”
“Sort of.”
“Okay. He was bouncing back and forth between The Lost Men and the charter up north. He and I… oh, Eden. He saw what Ripper did to me once. He got into a fight with Ripper and knocked him clean out. Griffin had to take off then. The club was going to kill him. Shit calmed and he and Ripper worked their shit out. He came back and I wanted to thank him for hitting Ripper.”
“Thank him?” Eden asked.
“I rode him until there was nothing left to come out,” Jenn said.
“Gross.”
“Sorry, Eden. You asked. It’s the truth. We fell instantly in love. He started to come around because of me. He was my saving grace. I knew it could never go anywhere. Well… Griffin had a plan. Ripper had been talking to some bad guys about stuff. Griffin sort of pushed the plan, hoping Ripper would get killed or thrown out of the club. Then I got pregnant.”
“So I screwed everything up?”
“No, sweetie,” Jenn said. “It’s not your fault. Nothing is your fault. Griffin and I knew the risk. Soon as I got pregnant, I knew what I had to do. I told Ripper and he wanted me to… you know.”
“No,” Eden said. “He really said that?”
“Yeah.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Look at you,” Jenn said. “I had an image of you from the day I found out I was pregnant. And here you are. More beautiful than I imagined. Why would I keep that from the world?”
Eden felt her throat tighten. “Thank you.”
“So I had to make a deal with Ripper. He asked Griffin to watch over me. He wanted nothing to do with a fat chick. His words, not mine. So I had to let him fuck anything he wanted, which wasn’t out of the ordinary. He trusted Griffin a lot. But it left me with the closest thing I ever had to a family. Griffin took care of me, took care of you. He arranged for everything. Then he made me a promise, Eden.”
Jenn put out her cigarette and stood up. Eden stared at her birth mother, realizing they shared some features. It was a hard thing to look at. To accept. Eden always wondered what her life would have been like if she hadn’t been given up for adoption.
“What was the promise?” Eden asked.
“Simple. He said that he would make sure you were protected. Nobody would ever know how and nobody would ever know the truth. But when he said that, I believed him. It comforted me, okay? He said he would take care of everything. Which he did.”
“So what happened when I was born?”
“Well, I had been knocked out. Not by Ripper, by the doctors.” Jenn smiled. “I woke up and you were gone. The first thing I did was touch my belly and it was gone. You were gone. That’s when it really all hit me. I started to cry. I looked to the door and had this vision. Me getting out of the bed and going to find you. Picking you up and hugging you tight. Then I run off. Just you and me.”
“That didn’t happen.”
“Of course not. I couldn’t move. But the door opened and Griffin came in. He was by my side the entire time I was in the hospital. He held me. He kissed me. He wept with me. He then showed me the information on the people who were adopting you. That gave me some relief. I knew you were safe and I knew you’d be happy.” Jenn reached out and took Eden’s hand. “I know everything that happened. Griffin kept in touch. I’m so sorry about your… your parents…”