@theRealRaven does this mean you and logan are back together?????
@theRealRaven omfg i can’t wait to see you two together again, you guys were my favorite couple.
I can’t wait to see @number1Toole and @theRealRaven fuck again!!!! #bestcouple #truelove
I already feel sick, but this actually sends my stomach clenching, and for a minute, I have to will myself not to puke all over the Shelby’s steering wheel. What the fuck is Raven doing? There’s definitely no project and there’s definitely no chance in hell that I would even consider a project with her, so why the public announcement?
And worse, she’s not doing anything to dispel the rumors that we’re back together. At this point, the mere thought of dating Raven again is enough to make me go Hulk Smash on the nearest building.
I’m dialing Raven’s number without giving it any additional consideration or caution, because fuck caution. I’m pissed as hell, and she’s going to know about it. She picks up the phone after only a couple of rings, as if she expected me to call.
“Logan.” Her voice is confident, controlled. “How nice to hear from you.”
“What the hell are you doing, Julie?”
“You know if you use my real name, I will use yours, and it bothers you much more than it bothers me.”
“Thanks for the warning. Now explain yourself.”
Raven/Julie lets out a long-suffering sigh. “I was just trying to gauge interest in a joint project. We talked about doing one when I was over at your house, remember? I figured why not toss it around publicly? See how our fans react?”
My jaw is clenched so tightly my head hurts. “You talked about doing a scene together. I refused, if you recall.”
I can practically hear the one-shouldered shrug on the other side of the call. “You were upset and not thinking clearly. I figured once you saw how much traction a joint scene would get, you’d see that it’s a good idea after all. And now that it’s announced, you don’t want to disappoint all your fans, do you?”
At the last moment, I decide not to take the highway and turn onto Venice Boulevard, driving a little faster and more aggressively than necessary. “You aren’t going to force my hand by doing this. My answer hasn’t changed. It’s still no.”
“You’ve changed,” she accuses. “You used to put the business first. Now all of a sudden you’re too good for it?”
“Don’t try that tactic. Even you don’t believe it’s true.”
“Then it’s that girl, isn’t it?”
There’s something raw and exposed underneath her bravado, and suddenly my nausea is replaced with something heavier, something tired. Is that what all this boils down to? Jealousy over Devi?
“You’re the one who left me, remember? Why do you care who I’m with?”
There’s a pause, and I wonder what she’s thinking, what her face looks like. It’s funny to think that she used to be the closest person in the world to me, but now there’s this insurmountable wedge between us, a wedge so large that I have no idea what she’s thinking and feeling right now. And then I remember what she said, that it was my career that was the wedge that drove her away from me, and my stomach knots in fear. I press down harder on the gas pedal, desperate to see Devi as soon as possible.
“She’s too young for you,” Raven says. “You should have seen her on LaRue’s set, Logan. She looked terrified.”
“She is none of your business,” I say firmly. “And neither am I. I’m done with this—all of it. I’ll let you deal with explaining to everyone that there’s no project.”
“Think about what you’re doing,” she chastises. “Throwing away an opportunity for what? A girl?”
“No.” I stop myself from saying all the angry things that beg to be said, all the threats I want to make if she ever bothers Devi again. Instead I just say, “It’s over between us, Julie. Emotionally and professionally. And I’d appreciate it if you could respect that.”
And then I hang up, because I’m driving past the airport and getting close to Devi’s apartment, and also because I don’t think I can keep my temper under control if I talk to Raven a second longer. I turn onto Grand Avenue, trying to process everything that’s happened, but unable to focus on anything other than my quest to find Devi.
My Devi. It makes me ache to think of her feeling lonely or unsure or scared on LaRue’s set, and I wish that I could have been there, by her side. She is so young, so very young, and maybe I haven’t been careful enough of that.