“Christ,” he growled.
I was already close to coming before he entered me and it wasn’t long before I went over the edge and came violently around him. “Kai,” I gasped as shudders tore through me.
“London,” he shouted as he pumped hard and fast a few more times before he groaned low in his throat and came too.
It was several minutes of him on top of me unmoving, eyes closed, hands still locked around my wrists. He finally rolled to the side, releasing me. We were both breathing erratically with the smell of sex and sweat in the air.
Unrestrained. That was what it had been. I didn’t pretend to know this man, but I suspected he rarely lost control—until me. I saw it in his expression, the furrowed brow, the unsettled look in his piercing eyes.
I perched up on my elbow, my head resting in the palm of my hand as I faced him. I reached out and trailed a finger down his chest. His arm was thrown over his face covering his eyes and one knee was bent as he lay on his back beside me.
“Kai?” I traced one of the scars that went from his pectorals down to his abdomen. “Who did this to you?”
He moved his arm from his face and tilted his head to look at me. When I saw the darkness in the depths of his eyes, my heart jumped with a tinge of fear.
“We fuck, London. Not share fairy tales of our past.”
I yanked my hand away and despite his words feeling like a slap across the face, he was right. But from the look in his eyes and the depth of his scars, his past was no fairy tale.
Why did I care anyway?
Because I did. I cared about everyone. It was the type of person I was and I couldn’t help it. I saw the good in people even when most saw none. I had no doubt the scars contributed to who Kai was and it saddened me to think that someone hurt him so badly it had molded him into a man who was dangerous. I wanted to know more. I wanted to understand him because Kai wasn’t all bad. If he were, I’d be either dead or he’d have beaten me out in the woods as a warning.
But he was right. None of this mattered and the less I knew about Kai, the better. One more night and he’d disappear from my life. I’d get my head back into my studies and pretend this never happened.
But I knew pretending I never met Kai, never having had him inside me, pretending he never existed was never going to happen.
I turned over on my side and closed my eyes.
At some point, he curled his arm around me, tugged me back against his chest, and then gently kissed my neck.
HE WAS EARLY.
Hours early.
Like it was still daylight early and I’d just walked in the door from school. “What are you doing here?”
Kai was different. He wasn’t wearing a suit or even a dress shirt. He was in a black T-shirt and jeans, snug jeans that hung low on his hips and made him look hotter than usual, which was seriously hard to do.
I watched him walk into the kitchen and help himself to a bottled water from the fridge. There was something else that was different. He had barely looked at me. Normally, his eyes trapped mine the moment he entered my loft. But today… he ignored me.
He was tense, on edge. Kai had that in him, but it was not in a threatening edge. It was like he was uneasy about being here.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
He didn’t say anything, merely leaned against the kitchen counter and chugged back the water. And he looked sexy as hell doing it. Shit.
He finished the water and tossed the bottle in the recycling bin under the counter.
If he didn’t want to talk, that was fine with me. It wasn’t like we had anything to talk about anyway.
I tossed my purse onto the coffee table and walked into the bedroom, rummaged through my dresser for clothes, then went into the bathroom and shut the door.
I’d just climbed into the shower when the bathroom door opened. And shut.
Our eyes met through the fogged glass and my pulse shot off like a bullet. The sprayer hit my chest, hot water pouring down the front of me as I stood unmoving. He kept his eyes on my face, not once wavering to my naked body even though I loved how his eyes trailed down my body like it was something to devour.
Hawks dive bombed in my belly.
Then I watched as he slowly undressed, his movements unrushed and smooth, just like him. He folded each piece of clothing as he removed it and placed it on the counter beside the sink.
I wanted to look away, but I couldn’t. The reality was, Kai captivated me.
Remember who he is, London.
I glanced at the sheathed knife he’d put beside his clothes. Did he go anywhere without that thing? I shivered at the thought of blood being wiped clean from its blade. Had he killed? How many people? Were they good people like my father?
Bile rose in my throat. I was having sex with this guy. I let him use my body and I liked it. I was turned on by him. That made me just as disgusting and vile as him.