A week after that conversation, as the parents and children played in the dining hall before dinner, Izzy watched from the kitchen when Ally and Gilberto and Jackie all scrambled over to Alyssa and, pulling her by her arms with great purpose, dragged her over to Benjamin, who was watching all of this from across the room. Jackie then instructed Benjamin to stand up. She held on to each of their hands and the two adults listened to Jackie as she tried to tell them what was in her head, the two of them never once looking at each other. Soon, more of the children ran over to the couple, surrounding them. They both nodded and then swung Jackie by her arms, swinging her back and forth, the two of them supporting the child as she giggled, kicking out her legs. After Jackie, Ally broke in to swing with them and, once Ally tired of the game, each child asked for a turn. Alyssa and Benjamin looked at each other, and they had to know that the entire family was watching them in this moment, trying to decipher the slightest of emotions. It was as if the other seventeen parents were trying through sheer force of will to keep the two of them together. Izzy needed to strain the pasta, but she kept watching, searching the room for Dr. Grind, who was holding Cap in his arms; even he was turned toward the couple.
They didn’t speak, only looking at each other, before Alyssa turned and walked back toward the table, seating herself, waiting for dinner. Benjamin sat back down and read his magazine that he kept rolled up like a baton in his hand. They did not speak at all during the dinner, the entire meal a subdued affair.
Once the children were put to bed, the parents on duty staying behind, the rest of the family walked into the courtyard. Even though they had to understand that everyone in the complex already knew of their marital troubles, Benjamin and Alyssa still walked together into their house, Benjamin only leaving again after everyone else had dispersed. And, as always, Izzy sat by the window, the lights out in her house, watching. Thirty minutes passed and yet Benjamin stayed in the house. Thirty more minutes passed, then another thirty minutes. Finally, the light in the house went off. Izzy waited a few more minutes, with no sign of Benjamin’s retreat, and then she ran for her phone, calling Carmen.
“What’s up?” Carmen said.
“It’s okay,” Izzy said. She understood how much she needed these other parents to stay together, for the family to remain complete. She needed all of this to work out, to overcome her constant worry that it would implode, and so she had to rely on people who, just a few years earlier, she did not know existed. She had to place her trust in people who might not deserve it, but perhaps that’s what others thought about her, the weakest link in the bond, the only one alone. So, she would do it, would put her life with theirs.
“What’s okay?” Carmen said, her voice turning serious.
“Everything,” Izzy said, unable to fully articulate what was happening. “Benjamin and Alyssa. Ally. All of us. It’s okay,” she said.
“Izzy . . . ,” Carmen said, pausing for a solid second, before continuing, “are you drunk?”
“No,” Izzy assured her.
Carmen said that they would talk in the morning and then hung up.
Izzy watched the stillness inside Benjamin and Alyssa’s house, resting her head on the windowsill, until she could no longer hold off sleep, though she felt that the minute she closed her eyes, it would all fall apart again. It was strange, to believe that she had some kind of power over everyone else in the complex, but she was too tired to dispute what she imagined every other member of the family also thought.