There was something about the absurdity of that statement that made me want to laugh. I wasn’t sure if Cade wanted to laugh too but a light shone in his eyes. He stood and we were suddenly even closer than before. My eyes started to water as I stared at him, and I realized I hadn’t blinked. My desire to laugh was completely gone and other desires were taking over. Desires I knew he didn’t share. He’d basically just spelled out why he hated me. I was angry with myself for the feelings coursing through me. I turned and fled.
When I got to the minivan, I had to wait for close to five minutes before I felt steady enough to drive.
He was probably doing it to drive me crazy, to remind me what it stood for, but whatever the reason, Cade was wearing that bracelet, beads and all, to school the next morning. And even though winter had finally hit Arizona, bringing in lower temperatures than we’d had in months, he was wearing a three-quarter-length tee and no jacket, making the bracelet that much more visible.
I glared at him in the school parking lot.
He smiled at me, but not a real smile, a challenging one.
I decided to take him up on that challenge. “Nice bracelet,” I said, falling in step beside him instead of trying to avoid him like I normally did.
“Thank you,” he replied. “It was given to me by a girl who was deeply sorry for treating me unkindly.”
“Deeply sorry? Is that what she said?”
“It’s what she meant. I saw it in her eyes.”
“You weren’t just looking at your own reflection there? That sounds more like you.”
He ran a hand through his hair, pushing it off his forehead, only to have it flop forward again when he dropped his hand. “It’s true. We all appreciate beauty. She recently told me I was hot.”
“Huh. Well, hopefully she’s had some sense knocked into her since then.”
“No, just this morning when she saw me, I could tell she found me irresistible.”
I laughed, trying to think of a comeback to that but for some terrifying reason, I was unable to. What was happening to me?
We walked by some students who called out greetings to him and he nodded back in response.
I shook my head. “You won this round.” I saw Isabel up ahead, and added, “I’ll win the next one.” Then I picked up my pace and left him behind.
I passed Sasha, who was heading for Cade, and she gave me a look so hateful that I knew she must’ve seen me talking to him.
“Good morning, sunshine!” I called to her, not sure what had gotten into me.
She ignored me.
Isabel was first with our daily greeting. “Chocolate-dipped bananas.”
“Yours always make me hungry. Why are you always thinking about food before you go to bed?”
“Hey, you’re not allowed to respond to mine until you say yours.”
“Man bracelet.”
“Huh?”
“My mom made me take one to Cade yesterday after how I treated him on Thanksgiving.”
I’d texted Isabel all about the Sasha-detention disaster, but I hadn’t filled her in on my visit to Cade’s house yet.
Isabel gaped at me. “Is your family plotting against you? First your brother invites him over and now your mom forces you to visit him?”
“I know. They must not have gotten the list of my enemies I specifically printed out for them.”
“Is there more than one on that list?”
“Just Cade and Sasha for now. It’s open-ended for add-ons.” I paused, thinking about what Cade had accused me of the day before. “Iz?”
“Yes.”
“Have I treated you badly? I’m sorry for the times I have to cancel last minute when family obligations come up.”
Her hands flew to her hips. “What? Lily, come on. You don’t need to apologize for that. I know you have a big family. Sometimes I’m disappointed when things get canceled, but never mad. You’re an amazing sister and daughter. I’m not selfish enough to get mad about that.”
My shoulders relaxed in relief.
“Did Cade say something about that?” she asked suspiciously.
I nodded.
She rolled her eyes. “Ugh. Don’t let Cade put words in my mouth. Ever.”
“Okay. Love you.”
“You too.”
The list of people I had told I wouldn’t write to Cade anymore was growing by the day—Isabel, myself, and now Sasha. And after my last few interactions with Cade, that was actually my plan. This needed to be over.
Between him thinking the letter writer was Sasha, our never-ending irritation with each other, my wannabe relationship with Lucas, and Isabel’s reaction when she thought there was even the tiniest possibility that I liked Cade … I knew it needed to end.
I sat down in Chemistry. I didn’t want to leave the unread letter under the desk for someone else to find. Specifically, Sasha. Now that she knew all about the letters, I was worried she would intercept them. I didn’t think she or Lauren realized where we hid them, just that I always had one.
Mr. Ortega held up a packet. “I’m going to pass these out and you’re going to get the period to work on them alone or with a partner.”
The class immediately erupted into talking and switching seats. I was glad he gave us the option to work alone. I stayed put and watched as Lauren got up and joined Sasha. In all the commotion, I snatched the letter out from under the desk.