I knew that thought made no sense. The fact that Cade Jennings wrote the letters should’ve made me realize he wasn’t the person I’d always thought he was. But I’d never understand how the person in the letters could be the same person who mocked those he considered beneath him, who’d mistreated me and my friend. He wasn’t. He wasn’t the same person.
Two girls came into the bathroom, laughing. They both stopped when they saw me. I stood, brushed off my jeans, and left.
In Chemistry I very slowly pulled his letter out from under the desk. I was shaking. For the first time ever, I dreaded reading it.
Humming on a Monday? Has that ever happened before in the history of Mondays? I’ll take the blame for that if you’ll take the blame for making me laugh in the middle of a Chemistry lecture.
Too bad there’s not a way for us to exchange letters during break. A week is a long time. I mean, your idea of airplanes carrying our messages was a good one, but I was referring to that new thing some kids do these days called texting. What do you think? Or am I just the guy who keeps you entertained during Chemistry? I’m totally fine with that title, by the way. Chemistry entertainer. No, that was bad. You’ll think of a better name for me I’m sure, being the word girl. Word girl? I think maybe you were right about banning me from writing lyrics.
The letter should’ve made me laugh but it only made me want to punch something. I refolded it exactly like he had and stuck it back under the desk. Cade didn’t know he was writing to me. So as far as he knew, the recipient of his notes wasn’t in school today. And I wouldn’t be in school for the rest of the year. I was not going to write back to Cade Jennings. Ever.
When class was over, I got up to leave. “Lily,” Mr. Ortega called. “I need to speak with you.”
My heart stopped. Had he figured out the letter-writing thing? Was I about to get in trouble for writing on the desktop and wasting my time in class? Was Cade about to be the bane of my existence again? If I could’ve I would’ve grabbed the letter I’d left tucked under the desk and made a run for it. I didn’t want Mr. Ortega reading it. As the class emptied out, I slowly walked to the front where Mr. Ortega sat behind a long table.
He cleared his throat. “I got a not-so-glowing report from the sub yesterday. I have to say, I’m very disappointed.”
“What?” I asked.
“He said not only were you and Lauren talking the entire class but that you gave someone a rude gesture, and then picked on another student after class.”
It took me too long to realize that the sub, because of our seating mix-up, thought I was Sasha. “Oh. We changed seats,” I said. “He thinks I was someone else.”
“He also said a young man came in at the end of class, pulling a prank. He was one of your friends, but you wouldn’t tell him who it was.”
“He is not one of my friends,” I said, my face flushing. I pictured the note stuck under the desk.
“Then who was it?”
Why wouldn’t I just tell him? I owed Cade nothing. Nothing at all.
“It’s not my place to say.”
Mr. Ortega frowned. “I’m very disappointed. After-school detention for two weeks. I’ll shorten it to one if you change your mind about coming clean and taking responsibility for your actions.”
“But—”
“That’ll be all.”
“What’s wrong?” Isabel asked me at lunch.
All I wanted to do was tell her what had happened. It was all I could think about. But I didn’t know how she’d react. What would I even say? I imagined how our conversation would go.
Remember that pen pal I told you about in Chemistry? It’s your ex. I’ve been exchanging letters with your ex.
The one you hate?
Yes, the one you broke up with because he hated me and I hated him. The one I still hate. Apparently we’re okay on paper. Perfect, actually. So maybe I’ll date him through letters the rest of our lives. Cool?
Of course it’s cool, I mean, I’ve made out with him and talked to him for hours on end for months on end, but hey, he’s all yours now.
No. That wasn’t how it would go at all. It would be better to have this delicate conversation off school grounds. Just in case I did cry, or if she punched me or something equally as dramatic.
“Can we talk later?” I asked Isabel. “After school. I need to tell you something.”
Her brown eyes grew concerned. “That sounds so cryptic. Are you okay?”
“Later. I’ll tell you later.”
She squeezed my hand. “Okay. Later.”
The already-long day ended an hour later than usual because of detention.
Ashley looked over at me as she pulled into our driveway. “You’re mopey today. Detention isn’t a big deal. I was in there like every other month. It’s a great time to get homework done.”
I didn’t want to tell her this had nothing to do with detention and everything to do with my letter-writing world being shattered.
“Good idea,” I muttered.
“Guess who asked me out?” Ashley asked brightly.
Like I wanted to hear about her—or anyone’s—love life at the moment. “Who?”