“Sweetie, this is what it’s all about,” I said. “About fighting and pulling through. Making things work. That’s what we do in the club. Not everything goes right and not everything goes to plan. But we make it work. I hate the way you feel right now, Belle. I want to capture it and steal it for the rest of your life.”
“I can’t stop thinking about you, Duke. Not Jim. You.”
“Me? What about me?”
Belle’s eyes met mine. “I couldn’t go through this if it was you in there. If you got shot. If you got hurt. I get why you never came back, Duke. Because of this feeling inside me right now.”
“Ah, sweetie…”
“No. Listen to me.”
“Okay, fine. I’m all ears.”
“I want this, Duke. Whatever it is and whatever it takes. Nobody could ever be you or replace you. But I hate the idea of you going out there and getting hurt. Just like all those years ago. You’d come home from training and you were so happy. But I was scared something was going to happen. You got sent over there and it was bad for me. I was in such a dark place. I had nowhere to turn. My father was going through the same thing because of Jim. I spent every hour waiting for you to call me. And even when we talked, it wasn’t enough and it wasn’t the same.” Belle’s eyes filled with tears. “The night before it all happened, I had this dream. It was us. We had a house. We had a baby. I… I woke up feeling alive. I woke up feeling a future. Then it all changed.”
I wrapped my arms around Belle and let her cry. Shit, I had been over there dodging bullets and never really thought about what it was like for Belle. Or for anyone who was back home. They were enjoying their basic freedoms and chasing their opportunities but they were also carrying heavy hearts of worry for those who weren’t there.
What a fucked up thing to go through.
“Listen, sweetie, I love you,” I said. “I’m sorry you had to go through all of that and then some. I told you, I’m going to spend the rest of my life making it all up to you. You will never be alone. You will never feel alone.” I slid my hands up her face and forced her to look at me. Tears streamed down her cheeks, over my thumbs. “I will forever fight for us. For you and me to be together. When I go out on the road, yeah, there’s a chance the reaper might claim my ass. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to live in fear. And it also means that every moment we have together we take full advantage of it.”
That’s when it hit me. The truth of the rest of my life.
I felt words slipping up to my tongue that shouldn’t be said in a hospital in such a dire time.
I opened my mouth again to say something but someone called Belle’s name.
It was the doctor.
We both stood up, holding hands, ready to face whatever waited.
I kissed the top of Belle’s head.
Then I asked, “How is he, Doc?”
**
Jim survived surgery. It took him hours to wake up and I sat in a chair next to his bed until he did wake up. When his eyes fluttered open, I grabbed his hand and stood up.
“Brother,” I whispered.
“Asshole,” Jim groaned. “You got me shot.”
I smiled. “You deserved it.”
“Probably.”
I stood there, smiling at my best friend. For a split second I saw Jim as a ten year old out of control punk kid. Clothespins holding baseball cards to our tires so it sounded like we were riding motorcycles. Stealing Big Jim’s air rifle to sneak out into the woods and shoot squirrels and birds. Getting caught and Big Jim cracking both of us across the ass with his bare hand. Not being able to sit down for hours but laughing the entire time.
That was my best friend right there.
Then we’d go upstairs and pick on his little sister. Twist the heads around on her dolls and convince her they were evil. Poor Belle, right?
Life was such a sick journey. A wild and twisted ride.
Belle came into the room and broke down in tears. She hugged Jim and he mustered up enough strength to hug her back. Then the entire MC came into the room.
To my shock, some of our brothers from Frelen were there.
“So this is the one legged wonder?” Miller asked.
“That’s me,” Jim said in a weak voice.
“Jesus, man,” Blaine said, “did you lose that just now?”
“Fuck, Blaine,” Gaige said.
“I lost it in Iraq,” Jim said.
“They ever find it?” Blaine asked.
I swore everyone let out a gasp. But Jim laughed.
“Hey, I’m just trying to lighten the mood,” Blaine said. “My bad.”
“Let’s get real for a second,” Trev said. He stood next to Miller. “This guy next to me is the President of another charter. The main charter for the MC. I wanted him to meet you.”
“Sorry I’m not dressed up,” Jim said.
“Don’t worry about it,” Miller said with a grin. “You’re a brave man, Jim. I want you to know that what you’ve done has helped the MC shore up some loose ties with things. We know who financed the Hell Five. We’re on good terms with the Russians, even down through Frelen. And thank you for what you did over there in that hell hole of a war zone.”