Jim shook his head. “I’ve bitched and whined enough to her. She’s done enough for me. I thought by unloading a piece of the land I was going to do something for her for once. Pay off my debts. Try to move out and on. She doesn’t need to live up here for the rest of her life. Stuck in a giant memory. She’s living as though Mom and Dad are alive. They’re gone. There’s no more kids. It’s all fucked.”
Jim got to me. He really got to me. I sat there and stared at my beer bottle. This wasn’t me trying to just save Belle. Or to just get a piece of ass. There were enough relievers in the clubhouse that would do anything at any time. This was so much deeper.
I pushed my chair back and stood up.
“Back on track, man,” I said. “I need to know my next step.”
“Which is?”
“Your decision on how you handle this.”
“I’ll call and pull the deal right now,” Jim said. “Simple.”
“Not so much. There’s big money floating around and my name and my club has been pulled into all of this. It’s going to take more than just nixing this deal.”
“Meaning what?”
“I have to take this back to my MC. To my table. That’s where we’re going to vote on our actions. I can turn on my club and get you out of here. Let you hide somewhere for a while and see if this all blows over. Or you can think about everything you just said to me and really think hard about it. Maybe there’s nothing that’s false. Make sure there’s nothing that’s missing. And then I’ll tell you what you need to do next.”
Jim threw his beer back and slammed the bottle on the table. “Be straight with me, Duke. Am I going to end up dead?”
“Maybe.”
Jim stood up. He thumbed toward the living room. “I better go out in style. I’ve got some firecrackers. Wanna blow some shit up?”
The gleam in Jim’s eyes was like when we were kids again.
I couldn’t help myself.
I nodded.
So there we were, for an entire hour, pounding beers, and finding things to blow up with firecrackers. From fruit to a bag of chips to lighting them and seeing how far we could throw them.
It was just like old days.
But in a way, watching those little firecrackers explode, it was like watching the past explode. Being next to Jim and hearing those booms didn’t make me think about Iraq. That was new for me. Looking back and seeing Belle standing on the deck, the moonlight hitting her, making her looking even more beautiful than she already was. I had a sense of family, a sense that was greater than what the MC gave me.
Jim got drunk enough that I had to carry the son of a bitch to his bed. He was muttering and trying to tell some bad joke and I got pissed off. I screamed at him to stop dragging his fucking feet.
He looked at me and said, “I can’t half help it.”
For some reason it struck me. I laughed so hard I let Jim go and he fell into the coffee table. He flipped it over, making me laugh even harder. He crawled to his bedroom and I stood there damn near in tears.
This was what people called the calm before the storm.
I knew it all along, but I went along with it.
Once Jim was settled I went upstairs to check on Belle.
She was in bed, sleeping.
I touched her shoulder and she grabbed for my hand.
“Stay,” she whispered.
I kicked off my boots and took off my leather cut and shirt.
I climbed into bed next to Belle, wrapped my arms around her, and felt something way too familiar. Something I wanted for the rest of my life.
She was asleep in seconds but I was awake for minutes.
And there was one single thought in my mind.
I fucking love her… I love Belle…
chapter twenty-one.
(belle)
It had to be nothing but a wild dream, right? I mean, standing on the deck, watching two grown men throwing firecrackers around like they were ten years old… like it was the first time they were left home alone by their parents… yet they were two grown men, drinking beer, telling jokes, making fun of each other, having the time of their life together.
That’s the way I came to know and fall in love with Duke to begin with. The guy that was always at the house. The guy that picked on me for my braces, first pimple, bad haircuts and outfits. The guy that also helped me out of so many bad situations. The guy that made my brother feel whole again after our mother died. The guy that was supposed to be mine for the rest of my life.
The guy that left and never came back.
But he was back.
He was…
I rolled over and popped up.
“Not in my bed,” I whispered.
Duke was gone.
Gone?
I touched the sheets. I grabbed the pillow and pulled it to my face. I took a deep breath and picked up the musky scent of him. All man. The leather, the motorcycle, the beer, smoke, and that lingering scent of sweat and sex. It was all there.
So I hadn’t been dreaming at all.
I knew things were far from okay as I tore the covers off my body. Whatever was happening with Jim and Duke’s motorcycle club, it wasn’t going to just go away in a day. Not to mention the stuff between me and Jim personally.
All that slipped away when I saw the shirt and leather cut on the floor.
Duke’s shirt and leather cut.
Then I heard the whir of a saw or something right outside my window.
I rushed to the window and was able to see some of the yard but not all of it. I strained my head a little and saw what looked like wood chips flying up in the air.