“Imagine how good it feels to not only have someone to take care of,” he paused. “Two someones. When I didn’t think I’d have anyone ever again. Let me buy Lexie a fuckin’ car,” he demanded. “I’ll spend every dime I have on the two of you and be the happiest mother fucker in the world. Don’t need something as trivial as dollars and cents when I’m a goddamn billionaire, holding half my fortune in my arms right now. Other half just drove away,” he near growled.
I didn’t say anything; I was too busy trying not to cry from his words. He may not speak much, but he knew exactly what to say when he did.
He searched my face, obviously realizing he had won the argument. “Now that’s sorted, can I fuck you now?” he did growl this time.
It was safe to say our sex life hadn’t suffered at all. It took him a while to understand that he didn’t have to make careful love to me, like he had when I was recovering from my wounds, courtesy of Sid. Not that I didn’t like the soft, gentle touches of a man who completely owned my entire soul. My whole, unbroken, unfractured soul. But I wanted the rough, brutal sex back in addition to the new beautiful, gentle stuff. I was tracing lines on the colorful tattoos that decorated his chest and arms, ones I had free rein to look at any time I wanted. And now I got to do it in the daylight, considering Lexie was at school. I could skivvy off work from some afternoon delight since I owned the joint, and Zane had flexible hours. Plus, he liked not having to be quiet when he made love to me. Or more accurately, he liked me not having to be quiet.
“What made you get them all in color?” I asked quietly, my eyes on the phoenix on his chest, emerging out of bright red and orange flames.
I felt Zane’s head move as he turned his gaze to me. There was a small pause. “Had enough dark on the inside of my body, didn’t need it covering my outside too,” he said by explanation.
My heart hurt just a tiny bit at this declaration. At the pain the man I loved lived with. He survived through. Right from being a kid whose dad beat him up, to a man who lost everything. Then found it.
“It’s beautiful,” I murmured. My eyes moved to him. “You’re beautiful. This,” I trailed again with my fingers. “Is a reflection of what’s inside. Beauty,” I told him sincerely. “I love the outside of you almost as much as I love the inside of you. The light and the dark,” I clarified.
I put my finger to his mouth when he moved me and made to speak. “Not done, big guy,” I told him. “I may not have shown it with the mastery of a withering glare and near muteness—I kind of went the other way—but I was broken too. In a way I didn’t think anyone could ever fix. Except Lexie, who gave me a reason to smile every day. To love every day.” I grinned at him. “Then a burly biker came into my life and scorched me with his withering glare. Little did I know he’d take every broken piece out of the ashes and put me back together,” I whispered on the end.
Zane yanked me fully on top of him, my naked body brushing his in a delightful way.
“You do not,” he clipped, holding me tightly, “get to say shit like that when I can’t fuck you senseless afterwards.”
Despite the fact he had just made love to me and given me two orgasms, getting “fucked senseless” sounded pretty damned good to me.
I kissed his chest. “Honey, I’m healed.” I waved my cast-free hand to help my point. “In more ways than one,” I continued quietly. He seemed to have a battle of the wills. Then, thankfully, he decided on the best option. He flipped me over; it was rough, but nothing like he would have done had my arm not been in a cast. His body hovered over mine.
“You do know,” he said, lips inches from mine. “I love you more than anything on this fuckin’ earth.”
I gazed into the bottomless depths of his now unshuttered eyes. “Yeah, honey. To the moon,” I whispered.
Then there were no more words, on the account of being fucked senseless.
Despite being married, living together, and kind of raising Lexie together, we hadn’t talked kids. I say kind of, because she was pretty much done being raised. She was done at fricking twelve. Unicorn kid. What can I say? She was like a reliable car. Just needed to keep it gassed, keep an eye on it and maintain it once in a while. The raising part was done. She was grown, much to my horror.
So we more than anything just enjoyed the family we had created. I basked in true unconditional happiness for once in my life, without the shadow of Sid haunting me. He had mysteriously disappeared when the police transported him from the house to the jail. When I had questioned Zane on this while in the hospital, he had given me a hard look. “He’s gone,” was his answer.
“Gone? Like sunning himself on a beach in Mexico type gone or resting in a shallow grave off an abandoned highway type gone?” I asked in an even tone.
Zane had looked at me for a long while after I asked this. His eyes roved over my arm and my face in silence.
I had resigned myself to the fact I’d never get an answer until I had reasonable motor skills and could sex torture him out of it. It was a thing. Gwen had informed me of its effectiveness.