Out of Bounds

He arches an eyebrow. “I’m sure she was. I’d love to know more. I’m just surprised you went to her for advice.”

“It wasn’t advice. I was talking to her about you, man,” I say, poking his chest because he’s pissing me off. “Telling her you’re a good friend, how we did everything together as kids, and how we work together now. I mentioned we were working on a potential deal. And she fucking offered the information, okay?”

He holds up his hands in surrender.

A heaviness sets into my chest. Fuck. Now I’m that dude who questions his buddy because of a chick. “She’s a lawyer, you know. She knows stuff about business and deals.” I say, like I have to defend my thought process. But screw that. Jason’s had my back my whole life.

“Bet you don’t miss meetings with her though.”

I roll my eyes. “Low blow, man.”

The corner of his lips quirk up, like he’s saying, yeah, but you deserve it, asshole.

Maybe I do.

“But either way, I’ll look into it. That’s what I do.” Then his expression softens. “Sorry,” he mumbles.

It’s not entirely heartfelt, but I’m not entirely feeling that way either.

I wave a hand in the air, erasing the conversation. “Need to go. Can’t be late. I got a streak on the line.”

Then I take off for work.

At the stadium as we walk through our game plan, I put both my friend and the woman out of my mind. I have tunnel vision, and that’s all I need right now. I don’t talk to either one of them the rest of the day or on Sunday. By the time the team hits the field for kickoff, I’m in the zone.

***

And it’s not enough.

We lose and we lose hard.

After falling behind at the end of the first half, I have to throw even more. I’m chased around the backfield, tossing rushed passes, which turn into dropped passes, and then I launch a motherfucking interception that puts San Francisco ahead even more.

They pad their lead and never look back, finishing with what can only be described as a pummeling.

Elkins is as sullen as they come when we walk off the field. “I shouldn’t have left my lucky socks where my dog could get them.”

I snap my gaze to him as we head into the stadium. “Your dog ate your socks?”

Elkins nods, his face dejected. “My German shepherd chowed down on one of my lucky socks last night. I wore them for the first four games, but he found them and chewed the heel off one.”

I pat him on the back. “Pretty sure it was my shitty throws, not your dog’s taste for stinky footwear.”

Elkins shakes his head adamantly. “No, man. You never fuck with a streak. And I did. He taps his chest. “This one is on me.”

“Then does that mean if you catch twenty passes in a row like a badass mofo, that it’s all due to your socks, not your skills?”

“It’s different when you win. Winning is skills. But messing with a winning streak? That’s just something you don’t do.”

The conversation nags at me as I shower, as I head to the parking lot, and as I drive home that evening, dreading tomorrow morning’s first post-loss workout, because Coach will likely tear us a new one. The whole time I reflect on what Elkins said.

Maybe he’s right.

Maybe you don’t fuck with a streak.

But not for the reasons he said. Not because of luck, or superstition, or football gods shining in your favor when you wear smelly socks.

You don’t fuck with a streak because it ruins your focus. It messes with your head. And football isn’t just a physical game, it’s a mental one. When your priorities change, when you stretch yourself to fit in more than you think you can, that’s the real screwing with a streak.

That’s what I’ve been doing.

Once inside my home, I crack open a beer and flick on the TV. Force of habit takes me straight to SportsCenter. Why I do this, I don’t know. But there’s something about putting your finger in the flame. You know it hurts, but you do it anyway.

Let it burn.

Pointing the remote at the TV, I crank up the volume. Soon enough, the host launches into his football recap, and lands on my team.

“Drew Erickson has played impeccably all season, but today the Los Angeles Knights earned their first L of the season. Let’s dig into what broke their four-and-zero record.”

Part of me wants to shout, “It was just four games.”

But another part of me knows deeply that every goddamn game matters. Muting the TV, I park myself on the couch, head in my hand. What went wrong in the game? Where did I fuck up? How can I learn?

When I raise my face and take a long swallow of the beer, the answer rears its head once more.

“Fuck,” I mutter when I set down the beer.

Because I know.

I felt it nagging at me when Elkins talked.

We had a smooth, well-oiled machine—one that I’d turned around after a hellish last season.

Then I put my focus elsewhere. I took off the blinders and let someone in. A woman. And I’m crazy for her, but yet the second this thing between us moved up a level, my game fell apart.