When it began playing a familiar tune—our tune—I wept. Just a little, but enough that Austin noticed.
He sat on the edge of the bed. “What’s the matter?”
I wiped my cheek, lost in the sweet melody of another life. “I was just remembering eating a corn dog on the curb outside my house when I was eleven. It started sprinkling, and instead of going inside, I used the stick to draw lines in the dirt.”
Austin gave me a bemused look. “What’s so special about that story?”
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing is special about that story. That’s what’s wrong. I can remember an insignificant moment in my life with clarity, but why can’t I remember my brother’s voice?”
He held my hand and shook his head, unable to give me any words of comfort.
“I thought about naming him Wes,” I said, sniffling. “But I feel like our pack name honors him that way. Wes never liked his name; did he ever tell you that? Maybe that’s why it’s a little funny that we’re the Weston pack. He would have rolled his eyes and asked why we didn’t pick something cool, like Diesel.”
Austin sighed and lowered his head.
“But he always loved his middle name,” I went on. “He said if he ever became famous, he was going to change it to that because it sounded cool with Knight as his last name. I want Wes and Travis to share the same middle name.”
When I saw the confusion on his face, I realized that Austin didn’t know Wes’s middle name. My mom had only put his first and last on the grave marker, and I guess it wasn’t something that guys talked about much.
My gaze drifted to the cradle. “Travis Loyal. He’ll probably never use it, but I want him to have something that Wes loved, even if it’s just a name. Maybe he’ll pass it down to his firstborn, and it’ll be a thing.”
A smile twitched on Austin’s lips.
“What’s so funny?”
The more he tried to suppress it, the more contorted his expression became until he couldn’t hold in the emotion any longer. He rocked with laughter and fell onto his back, tears glittering at the corners of his eyes as he tried to palm them away. “I’m sorry, I can’t help it,” he managed through a coughing fit.
I slapped his thigh. “You better tell me what’s so damn funny about your son’s name.”
He wiped his tears with the palms of his hands and stared up at the ceiling. “Our son’s initials are TLC.”
The hinges on the door creaked when it opened. My mom set a tray of food on the dresser to the right and circled the bed, showering me with kisses. “My baby’s awake. I knew you’d be all right. No one else knows how tough you are, but I do. I brought you something to help get your strength back. Bacon, scrambled eggs, and sliced oranges.”
She came around the bed and bent over to give me a kiss and a hug. When she stood up, she wiped a tear away and took a few steps back. This must have been so hard for her. My mother had never fully recovered from Wes’s death, and I couldn’t imagine having almost lost a second child and grandchild.
Austin stood up and rubbed the back of his neck. “I was going to do this alone, but I guess this is better.”
“Do what?” I asked, tucking the sheet under my arms.
Austin reached in his pocket, but I didn’t hear any change jingling. He pulled out a silver band attached to a chain and knelt down, sliding it onto my finger. “Lexi, will you marry me?”
This time I was the one laughing. “Austin, we’re already married.”
“No, we’re mated. I want to marry you. I want to be your husband and your mate. I want you to walk down the aisle in front of everyone who matters so I can promise to love and protect you. I want you to wear a pretty dress and have a cake with a plastic couple on the top. I want a day I can remember that’s ours.”
My mom gasped and covered her mouth, tears shining in her eyes.
Austin wound up the silver chain and placed it in my palm. “You’ll have to wear it around your neck since you might lose it. I didn’t get a diamond like Izzy has.”
“It’s perfect. But it’s missing one thing.”
His frosty eyes filled with worry, dark brows slanting down. “A diamond?”
“No. An engraving. I want TLC to be carved into this ring, because that’s how you love me, Austin—with tender loving care. And whenever I look at it, I’ll think of this day. I’ll think of Travis and that musical toy playing in his crib while we talked about his name. Think you can do that?”
He pressed a kiss to the ring. “Ask for the world, and it’s yours.”
“How about chocolate pudding instead?”
Chapter 34
June 12th, the following year
Maizy knocked insistently on the bathroom door beneath the stairs. “Lexi, come out of there. My knuckles are starting to hurt.”
“I’m going to throw up!”