“I’m here,” I said softly, placing my palms on his upper arms. His skin was warm and smooth beneath them.
I wanted this. Wanted him. For more reasons than I could count—desire, intimacy, curiosity, affection. Because I cared about him and I wanted to be close to him. I wasn’t having doubts; it was more like an awareness of the gravity of the decision. One I couldn’t go back from.
He ran the pad of his thumb along my lower lip. “Do you have any idea what you do to me?”
There was such fondness in his eyes that my nerves abated instantly.
“No idea.”
His lips turned up in a small smile. “There are no words.”
I ran my hands along his muscular shoulders and pulled him closer. I could feel how hard he was as he pressed against me and kissed me deeper, claiming, demanding.
With his mouth still moving against mine, he slid his hands along my torso, tugging my lacy underwear down and picking up my legs to take them off. I found his boxer briefs and pulled them down. He lifted himself and slid out of them, all without breaking contact with my lips.
Breaking our kiss, he sat back on his knees and leaned over. He pulled open his nightstand drawer and fished around for a second, emerging with a condom wrapper. In a flash, he tore it open, unrolled it, and was hovering over me again.
Then his brow knit together. “Hang on.” He grabbed a pillow from beside me on the bed and, lifting my hips, slid it under me. “Better angle,” he said, probably noting my confusion.
More evidence that he knew a lot more than I did about what was about to happen.
Chase leaned over me again, bracketing me with his arms. He was so big, so broad, his body an imposing presence surrounding me from every angle. Barely contained desire thrummed off him, like he was straining to hold back. But I’d never felt safer or more cared for.
I looked back up at him as his dark brown eyes caught mine, serious and questioning.
“You sure, James?”
I nodded, touching his jaw. “So sure.”
He gripped his shaft and slid inside me slowly, an inch at a time. His mouth dipped to meet mine again, tongue pushing inside. I drew in a breath against his lips as he pushed all the way inside and the stretching sensation grew into a vulnerable sense of fullness. It was intense, but it didn’t hurt.
When he was seated inside me, he stilled, pulling away from our kiss to look at me. He wrapped one strong hand behind my neck, gripping, holding me firmly in place beneath him. And with the other, he stroked my hair.
“Tell me if I’m being too rough, baby.”
“I will.”
Chase thrust slowly, intentionally, moving his body against mine. My breath hitched as pleasure instantly flickered between my legs. I closed my eyes, circling my hips to meet his movements, losing myself in the all-consuming feeling of him inside me. It was even better than I had imagined. And he was definitely right about the angle.
“You feel fucking amazing.” His voice was low and husky, strained.
His words only added to the frenzy building within me. I dug my fingers into his back, needy and desperate for more.
He sank into me with the same undulating strokes, relentless and demanding. The pleasure between my legs continued to grow, expanding through my core and turning into a need, an urgency for release. Bringing his head down, Chase planted his lips against my neck, sucking and kissing, driving me to the brink.
It was too much and not enough all at once, and I was teetering on the edge of explosion. I moaned as heat flooded my body, the nearness of an orgasm seizing hold of me like a drug.
“There,” I whimpered.
Chase smiled against my skin and thrust deeper, sending an overwhelming swell of pleasure through my core.
“Here?” He slid his hand down to my left hip, pinning me in place as he pushed into me again, creating a sense of agonizing ecstasy.
“Yes.” All my control disappeared, and instinct overtook me. I wrapped my other leg around his torso and dug in my heel. “Please don’t stop.”
“I won’t, baby.”
With that, I let go. My legs trembled as my skin turned feverish against his. Chase moved closer, covering my mouth with his and tugging the roots of my hair. With another drive of his hips, everything exploded. I cried out against his lips, clutching his back with my fingers desperately as I fell, losing myself completely in the rapture.
He tore his lips from mine, thrusting into me again.
“Oh my god,” I moaned. The peak went on and on, seemingly endless, as I pulled him tighter against me until it finally receded.
“Fuck,” he groaned, increasing his pace. “You’re so fucking hot.”
He dragged his other hand from my hip to grab my ass, pulling me against him roughly and pumping into me harder. Then he slammed into me one last time with a growl, muscles straining.
Chase stilled, dropping his head to my shoulder, his heart pounding in his chest against mine.
Drawing in a shaky breath, he lifted his head to look at me with a tired grin.
“You’re amazing. And so sexy when you’re moaning beneath me.”
Still recovering, I gave him a tiny smile. I was so high I might not ever come down.
He leaned in, kissing me softly before he pulled out of me. Then he stood and turned away, throwing the condom in the trash. I waited as he pulled back the covers and climbed in beside me, hauling me closer in his arms.
We snuggled as he ran a hand through my hair over and over again until my body was so relaxed that my muscles felt like Jell-O. I nestled against his chest, lost in a warm, fuzzy trance. Like I’d expected, taking this step had shifted things between us. A new kind of intimacy had formed, like being truly seen for the first time.
And my heart was full in a way it had never been.
He traced a fingertip along the logo of the T-shirt I was wearing. “See? Told you my shirts look better on you.”
“I’m partial to this one myself.”
“That’s my favorite on you too.” He sighed, falling quiet for a beat. “It’s weird.”
“What’s weird?” I asked, glancing up at him.
He rested his cheek against the top of my head. “I didn’t know what I was missing until I found it.”
My breath caught. I almost wanted to cry at the way the words made my chest go tight. It was like an overwhelming rush of affection mixed with an emotion I couldn’t identify. Maybe it was vulnerability.
“You’re pretty sweet when you want to be,” I told him.
“I mean it, though.” He ran his fingers down my arm, to the ends of my fingers, and back again.
“I’m glad I have you too.”
“That’s good, because I’m all in on this. And I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I can be pretty stubborn.”
We lay still for another moment, tired and contented. Then his stomach growled insistently, breaking the silence.
He flashed me a sheepish grin. “I’m starving. Didn’t eat after the game, then I worked up an appetite with you. What are you in the mood for?”
“Whatever you want.” Though now that he mentioned it, I was starving too. Shiv and I had eaten a late lunch slash early dinner after apartment hunting, but that was hours ago.
“If it’s okay with you,” he said, “I’m going to veto pizza. I’m still annoyed with that fucking delivery guy.”
I laughed. “Sure. And maybe we can actually watch that movie while we eat.”
Chase unpacked the food on the kitchen counter and sorted through it. I surveyed the contents of the three paper bags, which were probably enough to feed ten people. Styrofoam containers of rice, silver trays of chow mein, stir-fry, beef with broccoli, cashew chicken with vegetables, spicy shrimp, more noodles, and a few other meat dishes. The common theme here? Meat.
“Do you think you ordered enough food?” I teased, tilting my head. “I’m afraid we might run out.”
Opening the cupboard, I took out the plates and set them on the counter. While I was turned away from him, he swatted my behind with a kitchen towel playfully.