Fiji
Crystal-clear water stretched out as far as I could see as we walked the white sand beach. This was truly paradise.
Now if only I could get my thoughts on the same page. Since I’d come to the revelation that I was in this relationship to the hilt, that there was nothing I could do about being in love with Landon, I’d been a freak show. My emotions were all over the place, scrambling to think of a way to tell him, or a way to keep it to myself in case he fucked something up and left me again.
“How did your other midterms go?” Landon asked as a wave gently lapped over our feet. I lifted the hem of my purple maxi dress so it didn’t get uncomfortably soaked for the skiff back to the Athena. He looked like he belonged here in Fiji, his white button-up shirt rolled at the elbows over his blue shorts and tanned skin.
“Good, I think. I turned in my outline for my research paper, and I’m still waiting on my grade from Marine Life. What about you?”
“All A’s,” he said with a little grin.
“Of course.”
“Don’t hate me because I’m smart,” he said, lifting me from the sand for a kiss.
Our lips met, sending a torrent of flutters to my stomach.
“Are you all packed?” he asked against my mouth.
“For the most part. I figured I’d finish tomorrow while we’re on our way into port. We should head back, right? The charter boat will be leaving in about an hour.” The day had been perfect. No classes, no stunts, no stress. Just us.
“We have time. Want to explore with me for a second?” His eyes lit up as he lowered me to the sand.
“Sure, but if you make us miss that boat, I’m going to flip,” I warned.
“Don’t you worry. I’ll have you exactly where you want to be.”
His smile was enough to stop my heart as he took my hand, leading me down the beach to where a wide wooden path began. It stretched out over the crystalline water, supporting bungalows on either side.
“Are we supposed to be here?”
He shrugged. “We’re just exploring. Let’s take a peek and see if it’s somewhere you’d want to come back for vacation after you graduate.”
I slipped my flip-flops on so the wood didn’t burn my feet and followed him onto the boardwalk. “How about I just say yes now?” The bungalows were everything I’d ever imagined about a vacation—serene, beautiful, and somehow sensual with the waves gently reaching them.
But saying yes meant I saw a future for us. Of course I did—I wanted to—but the real world wasn’t anything like what we’d been living the last seven weeks.
“So what do we do over Christmas?” I asked as we passed several of the little rooms. The question had been nagging at me. Two weeks apart. Normally I wouldn’t have freaked, but the last time we were in L.A. together we didn’t do so well.
“I’ll be in L.A. for the first few days for the holidays,” Landon said, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. “I’m hoping you’ll come by and meet my parents, though.”
I paused. “We’re meeting parents?”
“Well, I already know yours,” he said with a mock smile.
“Yeah, they kind of hate you.” I cringed. “Was that a little harsh?”
“Nope, you nailed it. They do hate me.”
“Everything is easier here.” I looked over the water, taking in the exquisite beauty that was like nowhere else on earth. It was hard to believe that we’d seen so many amazing places and people, yet there was still so much more to go. But eventually, it would end. Panic crept in at the edges of my serenity. “I mean, when this is over, we’ll be back in L.A. Well, you will. I still have a year at Dartmouth. And you have competitions and tours. Even if we make it through this program intact, how are we—?”
His mouth covered mine in a deep kiss as his hands framed my face. “We’ll figure it out.”
“But what if we don’t?” I asked, needing a certainty he couldn’t provide me.
He picked me up, carrying me with one of his arms tucked beneath my knees as the other supported my back. “Simple. We agree that we will. We decide not to let it fall apart.”
He walked down the wooden platform without breaking a sweat. His breathing was even and steady, where mine was picking up the more my mind spun. “That’s not how a relationship works.”
“Sure it is.”
Did he seriously think it was that easy?
“It’s not,” I argued. “You aren’t just happy because you say you are. Shit happens, Landon. Look at what happened to us before.”
He stopped at the end of the platform, where there was only one bungalow left. “We crashed and burned. We were hit with a set of circumstances that I wasn’t mature enough to deal with. I made the best decision I could with what I knew at the time, and it was the wrong one. That’s what happened last time.”
“What stops it from happening again?” I asked, my heart thundering in my chest. I felt like I stood at the edge of a huge precipice, and I was asking if he had a parachute…or wings.
He set me on my feet. “We do.”
I shook my head. “That’s not good enough.”
He cupped my face. “That’s all I’ve got. When the problems arise, we’ll take them one at a time.”
“That’s like saying, hey, I know this giant tsunami is headed this way, but don’t worry, we’ll devise a plan when it hits the shore!” The panic had moved from the edges of my mind to fully consuming any serenity I’d tried to keep ahold of.
“Rachel…” His eyes went soft, like he was trying to soothe a wild beast, and I realized I was the wild beast.
And my leg was caught in a trap.
“Why are we worrying about this now?” he asked, being all logical and shit.
“We’re going home in a couple days!” I shouted.
“Yes?”
“I’m going to be in L.A., and you’re going to be in Aspen! I’ll be at home with my parents who hate you and will spend the whole break trying to convince me to leave you, and you’ll be snowboarding and acting all Nova-like.” My chest tightened, the pressure harsh and a little nauseating.
He tugged my hand and walked me into the bungalow.
“So you’re worried that we’ll be apart for two weeks.”
“Yes, but it’s more than that, and— Landon, you can’t just walk into someone’s room.” My eyes swept over the bungalow, and I sucked in a reflexive breath. It looked like it had been stripped out of a vacation magazine—dark hardwood floors with mostly open walls and shades, and a giant four-poster bed sat in the center of the room with netting draped over it.
“It’s not more than that. You and I can make this work anywhere in the world because we’re both incredibly stubborn. We’ll decide not to let the petty shit get to us. We’ll work through the issues that come up, and we’ll make the choice to stay together.”