She’d already told him she’d been unable to please the guy, and he ached for the little girl she’d been, for the young woman who’d been further hurt by the next man in her life because her husband hadn’t given her himself either. If she were his, Jacob thought, he’d make damn sure she felt loved. But she wasn’t his. And given that he’d told her he didn’t do love, she never would be.
And she told you she couldn’t love. But he didn’t want to believe that, didn’t want to think of her so beautiful, so animated, thinking she was incapable of love.
“My dad worked for NASA as a physicist,” she said. “He was under a lot of stress. Something cracked deep inside him at all the pressure, and now he does…well, nothing, really.” She shrugged again. “I think that’s why I stay on the boat for now. I’ve learned that when you don’t know what to do, you do nothing. Otherwise you get yourself in bigger trouble. The boat…me living on it…it’s me not doing anything until I know exactly what to do.”
He wanted to argue, wanted to tell her she deserved more, but who the hell was he to judge? “It’ll come to you,” he said.
“Yeah. I know.” She chewed on her bottom lip, belying her confidence, making him ache for her because she didn’t know if it would come to her.
“It’s no biggie,” she said with false cheer. “I’m like a rubber ball. I always bounce back. It’s a hard-earned talent.” She stood up. “Look, it’s late. Game’s over, and we’re both big losers.”
“No, we’re not.”
Slowly she turned to him, her eyes lit with challenge as she silently dared him. “No?”
He rose to his feet. “No.”
She tap-danced in place, looking torn between running for the hills and dying of curiosity, and Christ, she drew him in like no other.
“Are you talking about…the kiss?” she whispered.
“You know I am.” He took one of her hands and slowly reeled her in, keeping his hold on her light, making it clear that she was the one in control here.
But she shocked the hell out of him by not resisting in the slightest, in fact using her momentum to tumble into him. Balancing herself with her hands on his arms, she went up on tiptoes, her entire weight braced on his chest like she trusted him to keep her from falling.
The realization stunned him.
“Problem,” she whispered.
Yeah, there was a problem. Hell, there was a big problem. She felt way too good against him. He was already hard and had been since they’d first said kiss. And then there was the sobering fact that she was a mess, and so was he…
She didn’t take her eyes from his. They were so close, they were sharing air.
“The problem?” he reminded her.
“Right.” She cleared her throat. “Technically it’s more than one kiss owed. I owe you one and you owe me one, so that’s…”
“Two,” he said, tightening his grip on her. “Two kisses.”
“Yes.” She took a step back and came up against the captain’s chair.
Worked for him.
Still holding her hand, he planted his other palm against the chair at her hip, pinning her in place. Then he lowered his head and brushed her mouth with his once. And then again. And as he pulled free, she followed with a soft whimper for more.
With a surge of sheer, unadulterated lust, he captured her mouth again, swallowing her soft moan, taking his time now, letting himself sink into the first real pleasure he’d felt in…too damn long. The feel of her hands on his chest egged him on as she slowly fisted her fingers in his shirt, a low whimper coming from deep in her throat. She tasted like the Scotch, warm woman, and the very best kind of trouble.
Ending the kiss, he stared at her. She was breathless, her eyes revealing what he knew was in his as well—equal parts lust and shock.
“Uh-oh,” she whispered.
Yeah. No shit.
“Jacob?” She licked her lips. “Remember how you said you weren’t going do love, not ever again?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m going to need you to promise me.”
He would have sworn nothing could surprise him, but this woman continually did. “What?”
“I just need to make sure,” she said. “Because if you promise me, then I know I can’t hurt you. And I don’t want to hurt you.”
There was an endearingly earnest—almost desperately so—look in her eyes that made his chest feel too tight.
“Sophie.” He pressed his forehead to hers. “You don’t need to worry about me.”
“No, you have to promise,” she said with a level of urgency that had him cuddling her to him and giving her what she wanted.
“I promise,” he said.
“You promise not to fall for me,” she said seriously. “No matter how lovable I am?”
He wanted to smile at that but didn’t want her to think he was making fun. She wanted his word, and he could give it easily enough, confident that as adorably sexy as she was, he could refrain from falling for her, since his heart felt dead in his chest. “I promise.”
Chapter 7
Jacob’s words relieved Sophie so much that she nearly collapsed. There was freedom in knowing that this thing between them couldn’t go anywhere.
Except hopefully to bed.