He nodded. “I’ll get out of here.” His eyes narrowed on her face. “But I’m getting very uneasy. You’re always honest. If you can’t be honest, you evade. I believe you’re being evasive, Margaret.”
“Yes.” She reached up with her good arm and pulled him down to her. “But I want you to kiss me. I’d do it myself, but I’m having trouble with—”
She stopped as his lips covered hers, stopping breath, giving life. She made a sound deep in her throat as her arm pulled him closer.
Joy? Sex? Yes. And something brighter, stronger, deeper …
She pushed him away. “I don’t suppose you’d have sex with me now?”
“Shit.” He looked down at her. “No, I will not. Although it’s almost killing me. You’re lying there in a hospital bed, you’re wounded, you’re hurting, and I believe you’re trying to distract or substitute. Or do you think you’re sensing I’m in pain again and want to help me? What the hell’s happening, Margaret?”
She was the one who was in pain, she wanted to tell him. Sex would have been nice, but she really wanted to hold him, feel the strength, let the essence of what he was envelop her. But that was too dangerous. “I didn’t think you would. I just thought I’d try.” She closed her eyes. She said again, “Good night, Lassiter.”
She could feel his gaze on her face and sensed his explosive frustration.
Then she heard him turn and head for the door. “Tomorrow, Margaret.” If the door hadn’t been cushioned for silence, she knew he would have slammed it.
She could feel the tears sting her eyes as she opened them again to stare into the darkness. It was stupid to feel this weak and sad. It was a beautiful world and Lassiter was only a part of it. She would be fine in a week or a month. She would just work hard, keep moving, and let the sun reach out to her.
She would be fine.
Next Day
9:40 A.M.
This backpack is awkward, Margaret thought with frustration. There was no way she could put it on her shoulders with this bandage and sling. She just had to carry it by the straps. Oh, well, she’d work something out once she got away from the hospital. It was only important she move fast right now.
She stepped off the curb at the front entrance of the hospital and lifted her hand to gesture to one of the cabs at the taxi stand at the bottom of the driveway.
“Going somewhere?”
She stiffened and then turned to see Lassiter coming out of the door behind her.
His lips twisted. “Busted, Margaret.”
She tried to smile. “I guess I am. I was hoping I’d be gone before you came to pick up Patrick. Did he tell you I wasn’t going with you?”
“No. He was busy with his doctors this morning. But I could read the signs last night.” He took the backpack from her and nudged her toward the little park across the street. “I would have had to be blind not to tell that you were trying to skip out on me.” His lips tightened. “Would you like to tell me why? You’re wounded, alone, and in a foreign country. The sensible thing would be for you to let me take you back to the United States and get you well and strong. Anyone would say that’s the least I could do after what you did for me.”
“Would they?” She didn’t look at him. “Then they would be wrong. I did what I had to do and most of it was for me … and Rosa. But I knew you’d feel like this. I even told Patrick you had this guilt thing going where I was concerned.”
“I have all kinds of things going where you’re concerned,” he said roughly. “Lust, gratitude, pity, admiration, amazement are a few to begin with … and, yes, guilt. But that’s way down on the list these days.” They had reached the park and he drew her behind the small graceful fountain. “So stop bullshitting me and tell me the truth. Why won’t you let me take you home with me?”
“It wouldn’t be a good idea.” She moistened her lips. “We’re nothing alike, Lassiter.” She shook her head ruefully. “Face it, I’m not like anyone. My father called me a freak and so would most of the people on Earth.”
“Would you like me to go after all of them with something more lethal than that frying pan that you used on your father? My pleasure.”
“It wouldn’t change the fact that I’m different. You have trouble with accepting me as I am. Anyone would, but sometimes it still hurts. And you like to pretend you’re not kind, but you are. I don’t want to look at you someday and see you’re only being kind to me.” She smiled shakily. “You never said that there might be a someday, but it could happen. So it would be better to walk away.”
“Like you’ve done all your life? Hell, like I’ve done all my life?” His eyes were blazing in his taut face. “I feel something for you, dammit. And you feel something for me. So come with me and we’ll find out what it is and how we’re going handle it.”
She shook her head. “And you’d try to take care of me. You’d try to control what I do, what I am. You couldn’t help yourself.”
“Then you help it. You keep me in line.” He said recklessly, “You’ve fought me every step of the way. You’ve had no trouble so far.”
“Yes, I have,” she whispered. “That’s why I have to leave you. It would be so easy, Lassiter.”
He went still. “Margaret?”
“No, it’s not going to work.”
“The hell it won’t.” His narrowed gaze was searching her face. “But maybe not now. I can see that you’re squaring your jaw and getting ready for battle. But what if there’s no battle? Just the greatest con of my life because it’s no con?”
“No, Lassiter.” She took her backpack from him. “You don’t need me. You have to take Patrick to Johns Hopkins and get him well. You have a company to run and that monastery to rebuild that’s—”
“And what are you going to be doing?” he interrupted. “Where were you heading after you got into that taxi?”
“Monkey Island.”
“What?”
“And I told you that I wanted to see the pink dolphins of the Amazon. I figured this was as good a time as any to do it. I need to get my bearings. It’s going to feel strange not to be on the run any longer.”
“I could help you to—” He broke off. “Forget it. That was automatic.”
“Exactly.”
“And what next?”
“I’m going to visit my friend Eve Duncan. I want to meet her new son, Michael.”
“Well, that would at least get you back on U.S. soil. Am I allowed to help you get documents?”
“I’ll manage.”
“Without doubt.” He stood looking at her. “You see how civilized and reasonable I’m being?”
“I’m impressed.”
“Don’t be.” He was next to her in less than a second. “That’s a true con.” His hands were framing her face and he was kissing her. “You’d be such an easy mark, Margaret.” He was kissing her again. “You want to believe me. Against all the odds.”