She nodded. “Well, I think I could have convinced the lions not to eat me.”
“I think so, too.” His voice was husky. “I think you could convince anyone of anything. I was trained as a con man and I wish I was as persuasive.” He paused. “I want you to go on that helicopter with Patrick, Margaret.”
She was silent. “Let’s talk about it tomorrow.”
“Because you don’t want to argue about it now.”
“Yes.”
“I believe we have to talk about it now.” He moved away from her and sat up. “I’m going to have to leave soon and I want you to give me your word you’ll be on that helicopter at noon tomorrow if I’m not back in time to put you on it myself.”
She froze, her gaze flying to his face. “Leave? What are you talking about? Where are you going?”
“I’m going to meet with Estefan’s brother, Carlos, and persuade him to bring his not-so-merry band back with me to help get those prisoners out of the camp.”
A bolt of fear shot through her. “You said he didn’t trust you.”
“Hey, I’m great at the con. I’ve just got to see him face-to-face to make it work. It should help that I’m telling the truth.” He made a face. “Or maybe not. Sometimes lies do work better. But I’ll make sure this isn’t one of those times.”
“Are you taking anyone with you?”
He shook his head. “That would be a mistake. I have to show Carlos that he’s completely in charge of the situation.”
“You’re leaving right away?”
“As soon as we get back to the monastery. I’m going to borrow the monks’ old truck to go as far as I can and then hike the rest of the way to Estefan’s base camp. I’ll leave the van for you in case you need it for Patrick.”
“You have it all planned. What if this con doesn’t work?”
“Then I come back, hanging my head.”
“If you still have a head,” she said unevenly. “You told me that rebel group could be pretty ruthless.”
“I’ll still have my head intact. I’ve never had a con that’s gone that far south.”
“That doesn’t mean it couldn’t happen.” She moistened her lips. “Maybe I should go along. I’m a woman, and it might make you appear less intimidating to them.”
He reached out and gently touched her face. “The women in these rebel groups are just as lethal as the men. That argument isn’t valid, I’m afraid.”
“It should be. Just look at me. I’m not that impressive.”
“I am looking at you.” He cupped her face in his two hands. “Do you know what I see? You’re all golden and true and full of life. That’s pretty damn impressive. And I’m not going to risk you.”
He was staring into her eyes, and she couldn’t look away. There was something there that wasn’t passion, wasn’t anything that had been between them before. She felt suddenly part of him that had nothing to do with the physical. It was too much. It confused her.
She finally managed to turn her head. “No one has the right to make that decision but me, Lassiter. Not ever.”
He muttered a curse and his hands fell away from her face. “No, you have to do everything by yourself. Every decision your own. Total independence.” He shook his head. “Well, this time the decision is mine. You came down here to help Patrick; now stay here and do it. He’s in your hands until I get back.” He got to his feet and started to get dressed. “Which should be before morning.”
“You’re angry with me.”
“Yeah, you could say that. Maybe more about you. I’m angry and frustrated and I want to kill your bastard of a father and Nicos and all the people who made you feel an outsider because of that damn gift. You have to stand alone. You’ll come so close and no further.”
She got up on her knees and reached for her clothes. “It’s who I am.” She smiled shakily. “And I came very close to you today. You seemed … pleased.”
“I was out of my mind. I want to start all over again.” He shook his head. “And why should I care if I can have great sex with you? It never mattered to me before.” He turned toward the cave opening. “Get dressed. I’ll go out and make sure there aren’t any tire prints anywhere near the cave.”
She stayed there for a minute on her knees, giving herself time to recover. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. It had happened because in some way she had hurt him just by being what she was. He was right: She had to stand alone. She didn’t want it to be true. Closeness drew her like a bright beacon. So often she had felt that warmth with Lassiter and then had felt herself pushing it away.
And it had happened again today when she’d least expected it.
So accept it and go on.
She finished dressing quickly and then was out of the cave and heading for the van.
*
They didn’t speak until they were halfway back to the monastery.
“We should talk about the plans I’ve made,” Lassiter said quietly. “Mandell will be in charge while I’m gone. He’ll be staying close to the monastery and all you have to do is call him if you have a problem. If Patrick takes a turn for the worse or if we have any word that Nicos is on the move, then call me. I’ll turn around and come back at once. Otherwise, I should be back ASAP. It’s late afternoon now, so that probably means sometime in the middle of the night.”
“Depending on how long it takes you to persuade Carlos and his group to come back with you. And you will call me while you’re on the road and let me know your progress,” she said curtly. “I’ll take care of Patrick. I’ll do everything right. I won’t let anything happen to him.”
“I know that.” He parked in front of the monastery and sat there staring ahead. “I was an ass. I’m sorry.”
“Yes, you were,” Margaret said flatly. “I can’t be anything but what I am. I don’t ask you to be anything else. I like who you are most of the time. And when I don’t, I accept it.” She opened the van door and jumped out of the vehicle. “And I don’t like you going off by yourself. I want to be there for you. But I’m accepting it.” She looked back over her shoulder. “What I won’t accept is your getting yourself hurt or killed. So don’t do it, Lassiter.”
She strode away from him into the courtyard before he could answer.
A few minutes later, she was walking down the corridor toward Patrick’s room. She knew she probably shouldn’t have let her emotions get the better of her. He had apologized and she could have accepted it graciously.
No, she couldn’t. She was too emotionally involved with Lassiter, and everything he did or said had an effect on her. So she was not going to let him think he could hurt her and walk away. She’d be as open and honest as she always was and he could take her or leave her.
“So did Lassiter meet with your approval?” Cambry asked as Margaret strode into Patrick’s room. “You were gone long enough.”
She looked at him, startled. “What?”