Which was why he’d given up custody of Daisy to Ginger. Now all he had were visitation rights—every Tuesday evening, and weekends, if he was free.
The door banged and Gabe appeared in the doorway wearing only a ratty pair of sweatpants, a gold chain, and a ball cap. Ben had never seen him with his shirt on, and he felt surprisingly jealous of Gabe’s rippling muscles, giant revolver chest tat, and washboard abs. Sure, Ben kept himself in shape. Although he was undercover, old habits died hard and he’d never missed a workout when he was a uniformed cop. He still worked out every morning, and ran five times a week. But Ben wasn’t twenty-two any more. Nor did he take steroids that could be the only reason Gabe looked swollen like a circus balloon.
Gabe threw an arm over Ginger’s shoulders and Ben caught the shadow of a tattoo on his arm. If he ever became a made man, he’d get a tattoo to mark the occasion, maybe a daisy for his daughter. Or not. As far as Ben knew, only one undercover cop had ever been made, and Ben was damn sure he would never be number two because his assignment was finally supposed to be coming to a close.
“Ben.”
“Gabe.”
“Kinda late to be showing up to take our little princess out on the town. A person might think you don’t give two fucks about your kid.” Gabe lifted his chin toward Daisy, and Ben’s skin prickled. He’d had a bad feeling about Gabe the first time they met, and the feeling got worse every time Gabe looked Daisy’s way.
“She’s my fucking princess, and I got no say when I gotta do overtime.”
“Don’t swear in front of the kid.” Ginger lit a cigarette and leaned against Gabe.
“I’m Daddy’s fucking princess,” Daisy said, delighted, knowing Ben wouldn’t correct her. She was smart for a six-year-old. She already knew how to work Ben’s guilt.
“And pretty like her mama.” Gabe groped one of Ginger’s breasts, and she laughed.
“We just went at it for two hours straight, and you’re wantin’ more?”
Bile rose in Ben’s throat. He didn’t want Gabe thinking Daisy was pretty, or calling her anything other than her name. Hell, he didn’t want him anywhere near his little girl, but what the fuck could he do? He thought he was doing the right thing, giving up custody to keep her safe. Now he was beginning to think he had failed her.
Gabe grinned. “Maybe Ben will take her out for a midnight ride and I can fuck you on that pretty princess bed he bought for her birthday.”
Ben didn’t know if Gabe was a sick bastard or just messing with him, but unless he had probable cause he couldn’t touch the fucker, nor could he call his handler, Jack Freemont, and ask him to send someone to arrest Gabe for being a dick.
Fuck. He needed to get out. Once the damn job was over, he would challenge the custody order. He’d go back to detective work. Regular hours. Steady income. Nice house in a nice neighborhood with good people around. No judge was going to deny him custody, especially after he explained how Daisy’s home life had gone downhill since Gabe came on the scene with a full-on swagger and a car full of blow.
He checked his watch and shifted Daisy to his back so he could piggyback her to his car. He had a blue Volvo and a work truck he drove when he was in his Mafia skin, but when he drove out to the sticks to see Daisy, he used the Chrysler 300 the police had bought for him as a bribe the day he met Gabe and threatened to take Daisy and walk off the job.
Although he loved the thrill of undercover work, Ben was tired. It was becoming harder and harder to file reports about the activities of guys he’d come to like and respect—guys who considered him a friend. Yeah, they did bad shit, but most of it was done to other bad guys, and you had to be in the life to really understand. If criminals were whacking criminals and civilians weren’t getting hurt, what was the benefit in locking half of them up? There would be an imbalance on the street, and that’s when civilians would be at risk. And wasn’t that supposed to be his job? Protecting civilians?
“C’mon, baby.” He carried Daisy to his car. “We got about an hour before I have to go back to work. I’ll take you for a quick bite to eat and then I’ll bring you home and put you to bed.”
“Don’t hurry back ’cause her bed will be occupied for a bit,” Gabe shouted after them.
“I don’t like Gabe,” Daisy whispered as he helped her into the car.
“I don’t like him either.” Ben didn’t believe in hiding things from kids. He figured they were pretty smart these days, smart enough to know if an adult was lying to them.
“Can I come and live with you?”
He put her down beside his vehicle and crouched down on the sidewalk beside her. “I promise you, princess. As soon as my job is done, I’ll find a way to get you outta here. We’ll leave the city and go someplace where it’s green all year ’round and there’s trees and lakes and you’ll never eat another can of beans again.”