Nevertheless: A Memoir

Whatever Clinton did or didn’t do, none of it warranted the despicable and offensive nonsense that followed. I watched the impeachment proceedings while in South Africa with Kim, who was making a film there. On satellite television, some British Sky channels came in and I was able to see the news reports of what the Republicans were attempting to do. The whole sordid story about this witch Linda Tripp setting up Lewinsky to get the president made me sick. I agreed with Hillary Clinton’s assertion that many of their troubles were the result of a vast right-wing conspiracy, and I detested Kenneth Starr (whom Pepperdine University disgraced itself by hiring, no matter its right-wing leanings) and Henry Hyde’s hypocrisy, and those feelings would eventually prove impossible to shake.

When I returned home, I appeared on Conan O’Brien’s show in what I thought was obviously a parody of the McCarthyite mentality Hyde had fostered. On Conan, I called for Hyde to be “stoned to death” as I rose out of my chair, shaking my fist and plainly overacting. Plainly, that is, to everyone except the media and the Republicans, who both seemed to think that I was actually serious about the threat. The Democrats have their hacks, too, so Jack Valenti piled on, voicing his disapproval, stating, “It’s not something you parody.” Looking back, I still believe that Hyde disgraced his office with his actions against Clinton. The GOP, with an Ahab-like obsession, would stop at nothing to settle the score over Nixon and nullify Clinton. And now, nearly two decades later, that’s still all that the modern GOP stands for, nullifying election results and settling scores, old and new.

In that vein, the 2000 election dealt me a devastating blow. PFAW had sent volunteers down to Florida as part of its “Election Protection” effort, and I traveled there to work on the Arrive with 5 program, whereby we helped register tens of thousands of new voters. However, many of those we registered were turned away or their votes were ultimately not counted. It was painful to watch Jeb Bush seem to rig an election on behalf of his less-competent brother, as I believed then and still do that George W. Bush was simply a variant of Ronald Reagan. But Reagan was a front man who brought to the table an indisputable electability, then turned the whole thing over to his handlers while he essentially performed the role of president. He did not, however, steal an election. Both parties are guilty of some rather brass-knuckled electoral tactics, but nothing compares to the 2000 election (until, of course, we learned about Russian hacking). Once Bush won, 9/11 presented his crew with what they were after: a war for oil during which they destroyed an entire civilization, then handed the rebuilding over to their friends in investment banking and multinational construction, often with no-bid contracts. How much money do you think Bush Family and Friends Inc. made in the wake of 9/11 and the subsequent invasion of Iraq in the ensuing seven years and beyond? Along the way, the administration also squandered all of the goodwill we were poised to reap in the wake of the 9/11 tragedy.

During America’s forays into the Middle East since the 2003 invasion of Iraq, we’ve all seen photos of men and women either holding or standing over their dead child, the parent’s face a mask of suffering. Such images lead me to wonder what we can honestly expect from the people of these regions in terms of their feelings toward us? Even if the actions of the United States are well-intentioned, how much blood of innocent civilians is on our hands? I know that Americans live very sheltered lives in terms of the consequences of our foreign policy and that whoever is president must work to end that suffering.

After eight years of Bush, I wasn’t sure what the country was ready for. When Obama won, I sat in the kitchen of my New York apartment and cried. What a great day for democracy. When he was reelected, it was even sweeter. I think Obama was a good president, and I was sad to see him go. Those who believe that Obama has betrayed his promises about things such as closing Guantanamo or questioned his policy on an accelerated drone program are missing something, I believe. The military, the CIA, and the NSA have their own agenda. The president is the one official elected by all Americans, and yet he does not call the shots. When presidents come into office believing they are actually in charge, that’s how you get to Dallas in 1963 and people get killed. Then, maybe, his brother wishes to pick up where he left off and is killed as well.

I became complacent when Obama won, which is more a sign of my age than anything else. Our guy was in, so we were covered. Politics was also boring the hell out of me. I wondered who could right this ship after eight years of Cheney as puppeteer. Again, I thought of running for office myself. In 2013, some Democratic leaders from different corners of New York politics approached me, and we had a serious talk about me running for mayor, but my wife and I were expecting our daughter, Carmen, that summer, and we agreed that it wasn’t the time for an all-consuming race like that. What else would I run for? I believed that running for president, even building my way there by winning some other office, was impractical because the country remained stuck in the idea that the highest office should be held by someone inside of the current system. Also, I believed Hillary would win easily in 2016.

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