My skin sizzled, anger and disappointment building at my brain stem. I didn't like the defeat in her eyes, or the way she slouched her shoulders, shrugging off living another day when she was so fucking close to home.
“You can't give up now. Look, I'm not doing this because it's my choice. I couldn't have bailed you out in the first place if I didn't promise the other guys something.” I stepped toward her, closing the space between us, waiting for her to look at me. “I'm still the same man you met in that whorehouse, the man who gave you the most important thing he's got for collateral. I'm gonna help you out of this for good, but I've got to help my club too, and they need the reward your folks promised.”
“You're a criminal, Skin. No different than the rest of them – just a little less stoned and maybe less cruel.”
What the shit? Was she trying to make me explode?
“Maybe,” she repeated, still looking at the floor. “You want your money? Fine. I'll do what I can to convince my dad to give it up, whenever you're ready to let me talk to him. You know, if you aren't going to chain me up in here like Ricky and use me a few times before you decide to let me go. Looks like I wound up with a buyer after all, right?”
No more. I reached for her chin and grabbed it hard. She gasped, but the spitfire met my eyes, and I held her gaze.
I let it all come out in my stare. The anger, the frustration, the sheer need I had to save her while I prevented my club from getting completely shredded by Deads, without any funds to buy enough ammo to fight back...
Fuck, I knew she saw the desire too. I couldn't hide shit from this girl. If she didn't know how bad I wanted to rip her clothes off and stuff my cock in her mouth to shut her up, then she had to be blind.
“I don't need you to understand, babe. I need you to listen. This isn't a goddamned sex trade, and you know it. I'm not your new pimp.”
“Do I?” The hateful confusion in her eyes almost made me question it too.
“If you don't know, you'll find out fast. Right now, you're looking at me like I'm one more twisted fuck who's here to pour gasoline on your life and watch it burn down. I'm no hero. I never said I was. But I'm your only ticket to true freedom. Just like you're my only way to save my ass, and maybe everybody wearing this patch. Go ahead and hate me like I'm nothing but another pimp, or a Deadhand limpdick piece of shit sent to drag you away. Doesn't change the fact that we're up the same creek, and we can either sink our hands into the water together or drown.”
She broke my gaze first. I watched her little jaw clench. At first, I thought she was going to fire back again.
No, she was fighting back tears instead, begging every instinct I had to pull her up, yank her into my arms, and brush away each poison tear sliding down her cheek.
My hand went to her shoulder and I squeezed. That did it, caused her to surrender.
Fuck it. She didn't fight as I drew her into my embrace, squeezed her so tight I threatened to crush the air outta her lungs.
I didn't understand what this strange, beautiful chick was doing to me. I wanted to protect her, break her, and scream in her face all at once. I wanted to fuck her as bad as I wanted to wipe away her tears.
Worst of all, I barely even knew her, and she had my ass invested like a gambler chasing penny stocks.
The outcome wouldn't be any better either. Christ, no.
I'd grown up a heartbreaker, and this girl sure as shit didn't need that. I resisted the urge to put my lips on her skin, tracing those fiery tears racing down her. She gushed sorrow and shame for the next couple minutes while I held her, stroked her hair.
I wished to high heaven I really was her hero, instead of her fucking warden.
I'd made peace with being the bad guy, the outlaw, a long time ago. So, why the fuck did I actually feel bad with her?
“Work with me, babe,” I whispered. “This can all be over faster than you think. You can rebuild your life.”
“Okay!” she hissed at last, jerking away from me. “I'm sorry. It's been such a long day. I don't want your sympathy or your help. I'll work with you, Skin, but that's it...just enough to get your money.”
The distance between us was suddenly like a gulf. Still, I stared at her, smiled, and nodded.
“That's all I'm asking. You get yourself square with the club, and you're free. This time, for real. You'll never have to hear shit from a man on a motorcycle or sleep in a dirty room again.” I saw her look at the food on the table, probably getting ice cold. “You want me to warm that shit up for you, or what? You're not going back to bed 'til you put something in your stomach.”
“I'll eat. Just not...that. It's the last meal I had before I was kidnapped. Ricky put something in my food at this diner. Doubt I'll ever enjoy a hamburger again. His trick worked to get me in his truck, and...“
She stopped, catching a lump of pure sadness in her throat.