“She made it very clear that she did not want to speak with me,” Edmund replied through thin tight lips. “At least for the foreseeable future. She was not happy with the whole situation regarding Lady Victoria Hartmon. I kept away because I thought it best to give her some space. If I had known that all of this was going on ...”
“Yes, I know. You would have stepped in to help.” Iris reread the details of the letter again, trying to read between the lines. She could tell that there were a lot of things that Lady Jones was not saying with her words; she simply could not work out what they were. “I admit, I had heard a rumour about something like this happening, but I did not know the name. If I had thought for just one second that it was someone we knew ...”
“So, people are talking about it?” Edmund asked, a red-hot rage bubbling inside of him. One of the things that he liked least about society was the tendency that everyone had to gossip about things that were nothing to do with them. In his opinion, everyone was so happy that the bad things were not happening to them that they did not care what damaging effect their words had on other people. “Everyone knows?”
“I believe everyone knows at least something.”
Edmund paced up and down the room, racking his brain for a way to make this right. “What do you think I should do, Mother?” he asked Iris desperately.
“Well, that all depends on what you want to do,” Iris told him. “It says in this letter that Mary does not know that it has been sent. If this is a situation that you would not like to get entangled up in, especially when you are going through your own troubles with your reputation, then you can just do nothing. There is no reason why you should have to ...”
Edmund tried to imagine just doing nothing, but the image would not come to mind. He had not wanted things to end with Mary, not after they got over their initial hump of not liking one another. He liked her a lot; he could feel himself falling in love with her. If only it had not been for Lady Hartmon and her lies; if only he had not gone to the ball that night, they would have still been planning their wedding. Everything would have been alright. Maybe he would have been more involved with Mr Thompson and his meetings so he could have stopped all of this from happening.
No, doing nothing was not an option.
“... or,” Iris continued. “You also now have the address of where Mary is staying, so if you feel like maybe you do want to do something, then you can go and see her.”
“What if she still does not want to see me? There has to be a reason that she has not been in touch with me.”
“Edmund, she has not been in touch with you because she has been suffering the loss of everything. She has also had to contend with the idea that everyone believes you tried to ruin Lady Hartmon.”
“But that is not true ...”
“Oh, I know that. But that is what people are saying. Just in the same way that people are now talking about Mary.” Iris could see that her son just needed a little push in the right direction. Just a boost to encourage him. A little bit of reverse psychology usually did the trick. “Maybe this is not the right time for you to be rushing into anything to do with Mary,” she said with a shrug. “Maybe you are not strong enough because you need to deal with your own things first.”
Edmund got his back up at that comment, just as Iris knew that he would. “I do not think that is the case at all,” he said seriously. “I am strong enough; that is not the issue. I just do not want to upset Mary further, and I am afraid that my presence will do that.”
“Her sister has written to you. I think that is a sign. This Charlotte will only have Mary’s best interests at heart. If she assumed that her sister would be too upset by your presence, she never would have asked you. She would not want to upset her sister any more. She is going through enough.”
Edmund glanced at the large clock that sat in the corner of the room, noticing the time. “It is much too late for me to go now; I shall have to wait until morning. That will give me enough time to work out what I am going to say.”
Edmund left Iris with a smile on her face. She knew her son would do the right thing, and she also could not help hoping that this would get things back on track with him and Mary. With her, he was the happiest that she had ever seen him be. She was the key to Edmund’s future happiness; she just knew it.
Hopefully, some good can come from this tragedy, she thought. I hope that they both get what they want.
***
Edmund checked the paper again to ensure that he had the right address. He did, he felt certain of it, but he was still far too afraid to take that step forward. The fact that Mary was inside there, in a state of distress, crushed him, but he did not know what her reaction was going to be to seeing his face again.
He spent all night long tossing and turning in the sheets of his bed, trying to work out how he felt about all of it. While giving Mary her space, he had tried to distance himself too. He had tried his hardest to push his feelings right down so he could keep on going because he did not want to get too upset about everything. He did not want to lose himself in the idea that he had lost the only woman that he could ever see himself falling for ... but the emotions had not gone anywhere. His feelings for Mary were still there, very strong, circling his chest.
I have to do this; I have to face up to everything. I need to see her, to help her.
He did not know how he would have felt about marrying Mary now before his own reputation was ruined, but he did not think that he would care. He had always wanted to find the sort of love that he shared with her; he did not think that anything else would matter ... but now, after what he had suffered himself, he cared even less. Even with a ruined reputation, no inheritance, no dowry or family fortune, he still wanted to be married to Mary.
He just hoped that she would have him.
With a bolt of determination, Edmund stepped cautiously forward and reached the front door of the home. He lifted up a trembling hand and pressed the doorbell. His pulse raced nervously, but he could not ignore that there was a bit of excitement sitting in his stomach too. He wished that it were under better circumstances, but he was looking forward to seeing Mary again.
The door swung open to reveal a butler standing on the other side. He asked Edmund who he was looking for which made him pause for just a second. Was it rude to go to a home and ask to speak with someone who was not the Lord or Lady of the home? It probably was, so just to be safe, he decided to ask for Charlotte instead. She was the one who had sent him the letter after all.
“I would like to meet with Lady Jones if I may. Please inform her that Duke Smith is here to see her about the letter she sent.”
“Of course.”
Edmund stood in the foyer, just inside the house, as he waited for Charlotte to arrive. He did not know what to expect of Mary’s sister, but he felt certain he was about to find her angry. She said in the letter that she reserved no judgement for what he was said to have done, but Edmund knew that could not be true. Of course Charlotte would have a coloured opinion of him.