Loving You (Love Wanted in Texas)

“I could imagine he wouldn’t be very happy about that, Taylor. Why in the world would you leave a perfectly good paying job? Do you know how many college graduates would give their right arm for a job like that?”


My posture stooped and I stood there feeling like a fool. What was I thinking trying to do something like this? One look at my mother and I knew what I had to do. She gave me a weak smile and nodded her head in a show of support.

Standing straight again, I dropped my hands to my hips. “I know what you think, Dad.”

With a huff, he asked, “Do you really?”

“I wasn’t happy there and we both know I was put in a position I was not qualified to do. You want to talk about being in over your head.” I let out a gruff laugh. “Dad . . . I was so over my head I was drowning. Needless to say, it was stressful having to listen to Granddad every single day point out every little thing I did wrong and then expected me to fix it, not having a damn clue what I was doing.”

My mother frowned. “Taylor, don’t use that language; it isn’t you.”

Rolling my eyes, I looked away. “Don’t you roll your eyes at your mother.”

Cutting my gaze over to my father, I shook my head. “I can’t do this anymore.”

A concerned expression moved across my parents’ faces. “What do you mean?”

“This!” I said waving my hands about. “I’ve been so sheltered my entire life I feel like I have no life. Ever since I was little, I was told I could do no wrong. Well . . . I’ve done wrong. A few times and there are certain things I regret doing.”

Tears built in my eyes as I thought about the other night.

“Oh dear,” my mother mumbled, pushing away from the counter. “Taylor, if working for your grandfather felt too stressful, then that’s okay. He is supposed to be retired, so why he is up there every day is beyond any of us.”

“Your mother is right, sweetheart. I don’t want you being upset about it. You will easily find another job.”

My hands came up to my mouth as I attempted to hold myself together. “It’s not about the job.”

I quickly turned and ran up the stairs to my room before I lost it completely in front of my parents. Slamming the door behind me, I fell to the bed and buried my face in the pillow. I’d give anything to take back what I did.

Anything.

The light knock at the door caused me to sit up. “Come in.”

I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw it was my mother.

“May I come in?”

With a slight nod, I motioned for her to come in.

She softly shut the door then walked over and sat on the bed next to me.

“Do you want to tell me what’s really bothering you?”

No longer able to hold it in, tears streamed down my face as my mother pulled me into her arms. The smell of her perfume brought me back to when I was a little girl. Any time I fell and got hurt, she would hold me close to her and I would breathe in her perfume.

“Shh . . . it can’t be that bad. So you quit your job. You’ll find another one.”

I sobbed harder as I tried to fight past my throat closing. “It’s worse than that, Mom. I did something terrible. Something I regret and wish I could take back.”

Pushing me back, she looked me in the eyes. Her eyes filled with worry. “What did you do, sweetheart? You can trust me.”

My lips were pressed tightly together as I shook my head. “You’ll think I’m . . . I can’t believe I did it . . . oh God.”

Dropping my head, my body trembled. “Taylor, you’re starting to scare me. Tell me right now what happened.”

With a quick wipe of my face, I attempted to calm myself down, but all I could see was Jase standing in front of me . . . asking for a second chance and me turning him down.

“Jase came to see me at the office a couple days ago.”

“He did? What did he want?”

After I came back from Paris, I’d told my mother everything about Jase. Even him taking my virginity. The one thing I could always count on was my mother’s support. She was there for me in a time I really needed someone to lean on. Never once judging me. “He wanted to apologize for how things went in Paris and he asked for a second chance.”

With a slight smile, she grabbed my hands and softly said, “Oh, Taylor. Isn’t that what you’ve been wanting? Did you ask him about the girl he left with?”

A swoosh of air escaped from my mouth as I looked away. “He didn’t spend the day with her. He was alone walking around Paris and he said he didn’t mean the things he said; he was just scared.”

She squeezed my hands and leaned in closer with a wide grin. “That’s a good thing, right?”