“No. There’s no reason for Green to have sent us out here if he had the information he needed.”
“Why would he send you out here at all? Why not come after me himself? He seems to have had a plan in place for a long time. That money started going missing almost a year ago. Didn’t that CIA guy say they didn’t know about me then?”
“Ezra is ex-CIA,” Owen explained. “He was forced out over philosophical differences.”
She could read between those lines. “His bosses wanted him to find the drugs so they could use them.”
One shoulder shrugged. “I think every intelligence agency in the world would like to get their hands on her work. I won’t say they would all misuse it. I’m sure some of them merely want to know how it worked and how to keep it out of the hands of the rest of the world. But someone would use it.”
“It would be far too tempting,” she agreed. “Even the best of intentions can get pushed aside out of sheer curiosity. I’m not saying I would ever do what she did, but I’m curious. I’d love to see that drug and how it works.” She would love to know what it had done to her. She shook it off. “I would give you the package if I had it. I trust Faith. She said you guys work with Stephanie Gibson, too. I’ve never met her but she’s got an excellent reputation. I would feel good handing it over to them, but I don’t have it.”
And that meant she didn’t have any leverage with these people. They were here to do a job, and now that the objective wasn’t achievable, they would move on. She would be alone to face the music because she doubted the problem would disappear. This Levi Green person might shrug and walk away, but the Canadian police wouldn’t. Once it got out that she was under investigation for embezzling funds from her grants, there wouldn’t be a place on the planet that would hire her. Not for research work, and she hadn’t been a practicing surgeon for years. And then there was the fact that apparently she was being accused of working with a Chinese spy.
She would spend every dime she had fighting the accusations.
She would have to stand in front of her father and explain what had happened, why she’d broken the promises she’d made to him and her mother all those years before.
It was overly dramatic, but it felt like her life was over. The thought opened a deep ache in her heart because briefly she’d felt like she was starting all over again. For a few days it had felt like everything was coming together and she would be able to fulfill the promise she’d made to her mother, that she would be happy.
“Could someone give me a ride back or let me use a phone so I can call a cab?” She glanced around. It appeared they were by a lake that spread out before her as far as she could see. The cabin behind them was the only light, so there didn’t appear to be any close neighbors. She might be hiking out of here.
He turned to her. “You’re not going back. Do you understand what they’ll do to you?”
“Yes, I think they’ll put me in jail until I can make bail. They’ll freeze my accounts so I’ll have to call my father. He should be able to loan me the money. I don’t know what I’ll do about an attorney, but I’ll figure it out. It’s not your problem.”
His hands cupped her shoulders and he turned her, forcing her to look at him. “I will not leave you alone. We’re holing up here for a few days and then you and I will make our way to London. There’s a place there where you’ll be safe. I’ll try to stay with you as much as I can. I have a bit more freedom of movement than the others. I promise I’ll find a way out of this for you. I’ll keep you safe and I’ll clear your name.”
There it was, the insane impulse to believe every word he said, to toss the whole problem in his lap and let him take care of everything.
He’d lied to her and she couldn’t believe him. “I need to go home and face this. I’m not going on the run. Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not a fugitive. If this Green person doesn’t get what he wants, maybe the heat will come off me.”
“It won’t. He won’t stop because you don’t know where that package is,” Owen swore. “He’ll take you anyway. If he can’t get the knowledge out of the box, he’ll take it from your brain, and he won’t ask gently for it. He never meant to take you back to the States. He’ll get custody of you and take you somewhere no one cares how he treats you.”
“I don’t know how she did it.”
“But you could figure it out. I think he’s got enough pieces of the puzzle he figures if he gets a brilliant mind like yours on the problem, you could solve it. You could recreate the drug from the clues he has. Hell, for all I know he’s got some of it and he wants you to reverse engineer it. I don’t know. I only know that he wants you and I’m not going to let him have you. I’ll die first.”
There was such emotion in his voice that she had to step away. He didn’t mean it. It only meant that he had something else he wanted from her. She had to hold on to the cold man who’d walked into that interrogation room earlier this evening. That had been the real Owen Shaw. He’d strode in with no warning because he’d wanted her to be shocked. He’d likely enjoyed it.
He probably deserved it since he’d lost his memory because of her.
“Becca?” He turned to her and seemed to force his hands back to his sides.
She shook her head, backing away. “I won’t fight you, but don’t talk like that again.”
“I know I fucked up.” His voice was like gravel. “I know I made a mess of things, but you have to believe me when I tell you this was real to me. You and me, we were real.”
Of course they had been. “Do you not believe me when I say I don’t know where the information is?”
“The information is meaningless. You’re what’s important.”
“I asked you not to talk that way.” She couldn’t stand listening to those words coming from his mouth.
“Not to tell you I love you? I know I didn’t say it before, but it’s true. I love you, Becca. I’m in love with you. I don’t know what I was like before, if there was some woman I cared for. I don’t think so according to the people who knew me then. I think you’re the only woman I’ve ever loved.”
“Stop it.” She shouted the words. The whole night seemed to crash in on her and rage suddenly made the velvety darkness of the night seem red. How dare he say those words to her? How could he lie again? He put her here. It wasn’t fair or right, but her rational mind wasn’t in charge. She’d held it in for the hours it had taken for the truth to sink in. She’d held in her rage at being used. He’d used her. He’d fucked her and called it something else. He’d promised her his kindness and given her…this. Protection and caring was what he’d promised to exchange for her submission.
He wasn’t the first. Her husband had promised her much the same and then tried to steal her work and cheated on her with a more “womanly” female. She’d always been the youngest person in her class, and there had been a couple of assholes who’d tried to take advantage of that. Even fucking Paul Huisman made her feel small because she was female. She’d heard the way he talked about her, the way he’d told everyone on her team that she was too emotional. He constantly told her to calm down.
She wasn’t sure how she made it across the gazebo, but she found herself hitting him, taking out her rage on him. Her hands were balled into fists and she was using them on Owen. She struck his chest again and again, hearing the way her flesh thudded against his. It wasn’t right, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself. It was too much. She’d lost. She’d lost her mother and her childhood and her husband and her self-worth. God, it had taken her years to get that back. Now she’d lost her career. Decades of work were down the drain.
And she’d lost him. She’d lost Owen. She’d lost the future she’d thought they could have had together. She’d lost the peace he’d promised her.