Looks like little Leighton James is all grown up.
The last time I saw her, I know I hurt her deeply. It’s a moment I’m not proud of and has popped up more often than I’d care to admit over the years. A regret I will always have. The look on her face when she walked away that night held me stuck in place for almost an hour. I tried everything I could to justify my actions. To find a way to right what I already knew was wrong, but I knew then, just like I do now, that if I would have given in to the truth to my feelings about her, I never would have gotten out of this town.
Leighton James isn’t a woman that you can have and let go.
I knew exactly what I was fucking doing when I saw her heading our way that night of the bonfire. It’s the same thing that I’ve done to everyone else in my life.
Push them away before they push me away.
“Fuck!” I shout, pulling off my hat and running my hand through my sweaty hair. Settling the hat back on top of my head, I look up at the blue sky above me and wonder, not for the first time, who the hell I pissed off up there so badly that I keep finding myself in these positions.
Whipping the people I care about when the only thing they’ve ever done was care back.
Leighton’s words come whispering back through my mind and I squeeze my eyes shut, remembering the look of hurt on her face.
“You would think that in the years that you’ve been gone from Pine Oak you would remember what happens when you treat a girl like the shit stuck under your boot.”
“One would think . . .” I mumble to myself before giving my tire a kick.
“Maverick? That you, son?”
I look up, searching for the voice. When I see old Ms. Marybeth Perkins, I give her a smile. One that comes easily when I remember the sweet lady that would bring over home-cooked meals when Pops got too drunk to cook for his kids after Mama left.
“Well, I’ll be. It is you, sugar. Just as ornery as you were the day you skedaddled out of here faster than Jim Bob’s last win at the hot dog eating contest. Mind you, he had a little snag when he thought he could eat three of those dogs at the same time, but he still finished in just shy of two minutes. Mighty fast, if you ask me.” She ambles over slowly, her walker’s little tennis balls hitting the ground softly.
“Hey, Miz Perkins.” I give her a smile, feeling some of the tightness in my gut ease.
“You sure are a sight for sore eyes. About time you got your tail home. You here for good this time?” Her weathered hand comes up and she gives my cheek a few pats.
“Yes, ma’am. Just got back today.”
“Good, good, honey,” she says, still smiling and patting my cheek.
I’m about to open my mouth to speak when her smile slips and she gives me a look cold enough to freeze hell. The soft hand that had been patting my cheek lovingly gives me one more pat, a helluva lot harder than the last. She lets go of her walker with her other hand, brings them both to my chest, and balls my shirt in her hands, jerking me down to her level with a strength that I never would have thought she possessed.
“You young’uns always actin’ like you know everything when you really can’t tell a horse’s ass from your own. Dreams always too big for your own head, Maverick Davis. You had a wild air about ya, even as a young buck. Sowed those oats, I reckon, and now you’re back home. Where you always belonged.”
“With all due respect,” I start, but snap my mouth shut when she reaches up and pinches the top of my ear.
“I remember the day you left. Those back wheels of yours spinnin’ up so much dust it took years to settle back down. I might be old, but I ain’t senile. Watchin’ that sweet girl follow you around like a lost pup lookin’ for a scrap. Hurt her good when you left, but I reckon you meant it that way.”
I open my mouth, wishing she would let go of my ear, but she just gives it a twist and pulls me down so my back is hunched over her walker while she looks directly into my eyes.
“She’s been through too much pain in her years for you to add more to it. Leave that poor girl alone if you can’t get that stick out of your ass, you hear me?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Fuck, is she pulling my ear off my goddamn head? I’d agree to just about anything if it meant she would release her hold.
“Good. Now I’m going to tell you somethin’, young man, and I hope to high heaven that you take mind. Your old man was a sorry bastard, God rest his soul. Did no good by you three as far as I could tell. After that no-good mama of yours ran off, coldness settled inside of him that was just pure evil. You take mind of that, Maverick, and don’t repeat his mistakes. Not everyone has it in them to up and leave you. You left just like your mama, thinkin’ you were bigger than your own roots, and just like her you didn’t think one second about that cloud of dust you left in your wake. It’s time to come home, not just your body, but your soul too. Open that stubborn mind of yours and take a good clear look around you.”
“Miz Perkins, I appreciate what you’re sayin’, but I really mean no disrespect when I say that it’s really not any of your business.”
She hums softly. “Yes, I reckon you would think that, but you’ve been gone a long time, boy, and like I said, I’m not senile. I’m old, but not dead. When that no-good daddy of yours got sick it was like somethin’ snapped inside of him and he’s spent the last couple of years makin’ amends with your brother and sister. Tore them up when he passed, but you? You act like just bein’ here is too much to ask. You won’t see it now, maybe not anytime soon, but I’ve lived a lot of days and I know a stupid fool when I see one.”
“It’s not stupid when you’re makin’ sure you don’t repeat history, Miz Perkins.”
“Ha! Like I said, stupid fool. Wasn’t that you repeatin’ history when you kicked up that dust cloud? Now you’re back and just like your daddy, you’re hurtin’ those that love you.”
“Jesus Christ,” I mumble and pull my hat off, again, to wipe at the sweat on my forehead.
“You watch your mouth, young man. I’ve got my eyes on you. You remember that the next time you want to act like a little turd. Now give me a hug and go apologize to your family, Leighton James included.”
Fucking hell, I forgot how she always saw everything.
I give her the hug she demanded and kissed her wrinkled cheek.
“That’s more like it. It was good to see you, Maverick. You be a good boy and come by one night soon for dinner, you hear? Now be a dear and walk me over to Johnny’s car,” she says in a sweet voice, no sign of the old hellcat who just handed my ass to me on a big steaming platter.