Life In Reverse

I snort, my mother’s wide blue eyes and pursed lips still in the forefront of my mind. “Yes, I remember. The smashed Twinkies.”

“She was so mad,” he recalls, and a sigh gets trapped in my throat. “Especially because one of the packages was open, and the cream filling leaked onto the c-carpet.” We both crack up, our conversation interrupted by the sign indicating our stop as we hurry to exit the train.

The ring of my cell phone cuts off all laughter. Startled and anxious, I nearly drop the darn thing on the ground once we reach street level. Ignoring Chris’s chuckles of amusement, I unlock the screen and hold the phone tightly to my ear. “Hello?”

“Greetings from California!” Julian sings, and disappointment festers in my stomach.

“Oh. Hey, Julian.”

“Geez, don’t sound so excited to hear from your brother.” He cackles, the sound of waves crashing against the shore in the distance.

“Let me guess. You’re at the beach?”

“Have I shared with you how much I miss your sarcasm, little brother? And yes, as a matter of fact, I am. I’ve finally mastered the whole surfing thing.” He sighs into the phone. “I know I keep saying this. But you should‘ve chosen Cali, Vance. It’s really awesome out here.”

“Charming your way through Southern California, are you?” Chris smirks next to me and I add, “Speaking of charming, we’re on the streets of New York as we speak.”

“Oh yeah? And how are things in The Big Apple?”

My chest constricts but I shrug it off. “Good. Busy.” Chris mutters Ember’s name in the background and I put a finger to my lips to shush him. “Technology never sleeps.”

“So… anything else new?”

“Julian,” I reply, unable to hide my frustration. “I just spoke to you last week. Not much has changed.” Chris tilts his head, tossing me a look I disregard. “I’ve been too busy, anyway.”

“Okay. Cut the crap, Vance. What’s going on? And don’t say nothing because I can hear it in your voice.” I huff out a loud breath. “See, I knew it. Are you feeling okay? What is it?”

“I… ran into Ember on the subway,” I confess, and he’s quiet for so long I almost think he hung up. “Julian?”

“Please tell me that you got down on your hands and knees and begged for her forgiveness. Because you are insane if you let her go again.”

I picture the dude in the bar and my throat tenses. I clear it and go on. “She’s with someone now, Julian.”

“Is she married?” he probes, and I should have kept my mouth closed. I already know his opinion on my actions three years ago and the fact that I didn’t want contact with anyone, including him at the time.

“I don’t know.”

“Well, I suggest—”

“Julian,” I interrupt, because I can’t talk about this right now, given that she hasn’t called me. “Thanks, okay. I appreciate what you’re trying to do. It’s just that… the ball is kind of in her court now so I have to wait it out.”

“In other words, get off your back,” he jibes.

“Basically.”

“All right, bro, I’m off to catch some prime morning waves. But call me later in the week, otherwise I’m going to hunt you down.” Someone shouts his name and his voice becomes muffled. “I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Later.” I hit end and come face-to-face with Chris’s smug grin.

“You’ve got it barreling at you from all s-sides. Don’t you feel loved?” I frown at his choice of words and he grasps my shoulder, shooting me an empathetic smile. “Okay, wrong thing to say. But she’ll call. Just give her some time.”

Time is all I have.





“ALL RIGHT, LARRY. The Cisco firewall is up and running and all the Windows workstations are networked to the new server we installed. Chris handled setting up the network for the space on the first floor so you should be all set.”

Larry extends his hand to shake mine. “You two are like the dream team. Which reminds me.” He removes the wallet from his pocket and hands me a business card. “One of my old colleagues has a start-up and needs some advice with respect to network security and clouds,” he scratches his head, “I think, anyway. I don’t know all the details, but I did tell him that you’d be a fantastic resource.”

“Great. Thanks, Larry. I appreciate it.”

“Don’t mention it.” He slides his wallet back into the pocket of his suit jacket then checks his watch. “I’d like to buy you two some dinner.” He glances at the time again and shakes his head. “But considering I’ve missed dinner every day this week, the wife isn’t going to be too happy if I add another night to my list of travesties. I might be endangering my credit card limit.”

“No worries.” I laugh. “I get it.”

My phone rings and I excuse myself from our conversation to scoop it up from a nearby cubicle. “Hello?” Silence greets me at the other end of the line, but I vaguely hear soft breathing. My heart skyrockets in my chest and I say a silent prayer. “Ember?”

Beth Michele's books