Rest in peace my love, Christine.
“It changes you,” I repeated, hoarsely. “Knowing that two kids, who had their whole lives ahead of them died, so you could make a quick buck—it fucking wrecks you, man. That was the beginning of the end for me and Christine. I stopped going home, started staying here every night. I couldn’t look at her; I couldn’t let myself have something as good as her when all I ever did was take the good from other people.”
I sighed, pushing back the bottle.
“She thought I was cheating on her and that’s when Brantley came around. He was a rookie then, looking to make a name for himself and thought he’d start by taking down the Satan’s Knights. He’s smart, I’ll give the son of a bitch that. He looked for the weakest link, found it was me, and used my wife as bait.”
Here I was all these years later, still the weakest link only there was a different innocent woman being used as bait.
“He gave Christine all the attention I wasn’t giving her anymore, made her feel things I gave up on making her feel, and promised her all the things I couldn’t. He used her, played on her broken emotions and convinced her I would wind up dead because of the club. I found out they were having an affair, put two and two together and confronted her but she had already made a deal with him. She would get the drugs from me and prove I was dealing the shit that killed those two kids,” he said, solemnly. “Instead of giving me up she gave up her life.”
As similar as the stories were they were different.
As similar as Lacey and Christine were…they too were different.
I was Lacey’s one and only.
I was supposed to be Christine’s one and only too.
Christine gave her life for mine.
And I’d give mine for Lacey’s.
I covered my face with my hands and felt Riggs pat me on the back. A groan escaped my lips as I dropped my hands from my face and pinned Riggs with a stare.
Don’t be me, man.
Hang on to that woman of yours.
Hold that baby of yours and fucking enjoy life.
You only get one.
“Jack’s been trying for a long time to get this club on the right track, to give us some peace. He thinks he can turn us into a legit club and make us proud to call ourselves the Satan’s Knights—but he’s in over his head. We’re in too deep, and every time we think we are pulling ourselves out of the hole, some other fucking threat comes along. Whether it’s a man in a fur coat or a fucking Chinese emperor, there will always be a fucking cancer that will drag us down.”
Truth.
I glanced down at my hands, turning them over and displayed my palms.
“See these hands? They have a lot of blood on them and that’s all I see when I look at them, all the blood and all the faces of the people who bled from these hands.”
They didn’t have Lacey’s though.
I could still close my eyes and see her pretty face and not her blood on my hands.
“Blackie…” he started.
I shook my head and interrupted him.
Let the devil teach you something.
“You got something good with Bianci’s sister, stop trying to prove yourself, man, you paid your dues. Now, take a step back and don’t let that girl doubt she has you because when you don’t have her anymore you’re going to feel it,” I promised as the words got stuck in my throat.
And when you feel it you’re going to wish you were dead.
Chapter Twenty-six
Something was wrong.
This time I didn’t have to wait for the sadistic voice to poison me with foolish thoughts.
This time I felt it with every fiber of my being.
With every crack of my heart.
The inbox you are trying to reach is full.
I disconnected the call and shoved the phone into my pocketbook before I ran my fingers through my hair and stared up at the gray sky willing myself not to cry. I blew out a breath and tried to tell myself that I was overreacting that I was used to bad things happening and didn’t know how to enjoy the good.
But I couldn’t shake the feeling my world was crumbling, and I didn’t even receive an invitation to the end.
I grabbed my mother’s keys from my purse and started for the campus parking lot when I heard someone call my name.
“Lacey, wait up!” I turned on my heel and saw Brandon running across the grass with a smile on his face.
“Shit,” I muttered. Why won’t this guy get the hint?
“You in a hurry?”
“Actually, I am,” I said, forcing a smile.
“I was going to ask you if you wanted to go grab a quick bite,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets as he flashed a smile. He had such perfectly straight teeth and a smile so white he looked like a poster boy for Colgate.
“That would be nice Brandon but I’m…I’m seeing someone.”
“The old biker guy? Come on, Lace, you’re not serious are you?”
“Lacey,” I corrected through gritted teeth.