“We’ve done all of this together,” I whisper. “Even when we were kids, it’s always been you and me, standing strong against the storm. And that’s how we have to end it.”
My other hand moves to his cheek, pulling him even closer, until there’s nothing separating us but the last of our hesitation.
I never thought I’d be ready for this moment again.
But it’s like Gus said.
We chose each other once.
I just have to show Vane that I still believe.
My eyes focus on his mouth, and Vane sucks in a shaky breath.
He wants this.
So do I.
And yet, as I lean that last little bit, Vane turns his face aside and pulls away.
CHAPTER 39
VANE
Audra was going to kiss me.
WHY DIDN’T I LET HER KISS ME?
Why did I listen to that tiny, niggling voice in the back of my head?
The rest of my brain was whooping and hollering and shooting off confetti cannons—but that stupid freaking voice had to go and ask, How can she actually be ready for this?
Gus died like an hour ago.
And she still doesn’t know how badly she hurt her mom.
And she’s been a hostage for days.
And all of that just doesn’t seem like the right time for her to be making a major life decision.
So I turned my freaking head away, and now she’s looking at me with so much shock and betrayal I’m tempted to cling to her ankles so she can’t leave until I’ve had a chance to explain.
Instead, I open my big, stupid mouth and say, “Sorry, it’s just . . . Solana’s over there. . . .”
And with that, Audra walks away.
The door slams behind her, and I sink to my knees.
“Well,” Solana says as I punch the floor—and then curse at myself for punching the floor. “That was unexpected.”
I bury my face in my throbbing hands.
I wanted to do it right this time.
Not just right—better.
I mean . . . the first time we bonded was in the middle of a freaking battlefield, with a dead Stormer, like, right there. And our next big, important kiss was in Death Valley, right after Gus killed his father’s Living Storm and there were Stormers attacking us.
Is it so bad that I didn’t want the third time to happen in a bloodstained girls’ bathroom with Solana standing by watching?
Especially since I don’t see how Audra could really be ready to make that kind of commitment. I just want to make sure I don’t end up on her list of regrets.
“For what it’s worth,” Solana says, “I think you did the right thing.”
“Do me a favor and tell Audra that, will you? Actually—don’t, she’ll probably read something really bad into that.”
In fact, the longer I stay in here alone with Solana, the worse I’m making all of this look.
“Why does love have to be so complicated?” I ask.
I mean seriously, none of those sappy movies my mom loves to watch have betrothals and suicide drafts and broken bonds in them. Can’t I just be the guy who stands outside her window holding a boom box or something?
“Well, I don’t exactly have a lot of experience in this area,” Solana says, “but I know you guys will work this out. She’ll be thanking you in a few days.”
A few days?
Why does that sound like forever?
Solana offers me a hand up so I’ll stop being a Vane-lump on the floor. I’m about to take it when I realize how not cool it is to make her deal with my love drama.
“We should go,” I say, getting up on my own.
Audra’s waiting for us on the other side of the door with her coat buttoned up to her neck and her eyes glued firmly to her brown hiking shoes. I’m pretty sure she’s been crying—proof that doing the right thing sucks for everybody.
But there’s nothing I can do about it right now, except lead the way back to the entrance.
The lobby seems twice as full as it was before, including several moms holding tiny babies.
“We have to get Raiden away from here,” I mumble.
“Where are we going to lead him?” Solana asks.
She emphasizes the word “we,” and I know there’s no point arguing—though I can’t help hoping all the fresh awkwardness might convince Audra to go with Aston.
“I’m still figuring out the best place to go,” I admit.
It would take too much energy to head all the way back to the desert—and my hometown has suffered enough, anyway.
The closer we get to the Gales, though, the faster they’ll be able to meet us, so we need to focus on places that are in the middle.
“It should be Nebraska,” Audra says without looking at me. “The winds are strong there. And there’s plenty of empty land. And . . . that’s where it all began—for us, at least.”
Actually, that’s kind of . . . poetic.
Let’s crush Raiden the same place he tried to crush us.
“We’ll need to take a pipeline,” I tell her. “That way we have a little time to prepare.”
“Prepare for what?” Blazer Guy asks, coming up beside me.