There’s a huge red-and-white building with pointed roofs and narrow windows. It almost looks like a castle, but I’m guessing it’s probably a hotel.
“You have to get away from the wind,” Arella says. “I’m sending Raiden a false trail, but he won’t believe it if he picks up the real one.”
She must be using the same trick she used after she killed my parents to make him believe we were all dead. Sylphs lose a piece of ourselves when someone we love dies, and Arella knows how to change the loss and make it carry a message. The concept makes zero sense, but if it buys us some time, I’m not going to stop her.
We need to clean our wounds and rest for a second. But we’ve only gone a few steps before I hear Audra let out a sharp cry.
I’m picturing snapped necks and suicide drafts as I tear through the snow to her side.
It’s almost as heartbreaking to find the real problem is Aston trying to pull her away from Gus.
“I’ll take care of him,” he promises.
She tightens her hold, kicking and sobbing and flailing.
Until she notices me.
The pain in her eyes nearly knocks me over, and I try to think of something to say.
All I can do is stretch out my arms and offer her a place to hide.
Slowly—very slowly—she lets go of Gus and stumbles over to me, burying her face in my shoulder.
I hold her as tight as I can, just like I did after the storm that shattered our families.
A different kind of bond formed between us that day.
But right now . . . I can’t feel it.
I can’t feel anything except a rage so thick it fills me with the darkest, coldest kind of hate.
A crunch of branches makes us jump, and we both turn to watch Aston carrying Gus into the trees.
I don’t know what he’s going to do with him, but I’m glad I won’t have to see it.
“He’s gone,” Audra whispers. “How can he be gone?”
“I don’t know.”
But I know everything’s changed.
My instincts have fallen silent.
I’m finally ready to do what has to be done.
I’m going to end this the only way it will ever really be over.
I’m going to find a way to kill Raiden.
CHAPTER 36
AUDRA
I should’ve paid closer attention.
Should’ve seen something that could’ve saved Gus.
Instead, I hovered helplessly by and let Raiden snuff the life out of him.
After all the sacrifices Gus made.
All the suffering he endured.
I failed him.
And then . . . I breathed in his gift.
I didn’t want to.
But Gus chose me.
His final message said, To make sure you keep fighting.
So I inhaled the power and let it settle into my essence, just like the day I breathed in my father’s gift.
A tiny piece of him to cling to.
But it will never be enough.
And I will never be worthy.
Aston returns from the forest with empty arms and an empty stare, and I can’t bring myself to ask what he did with the body.
“I know you’re not going to believe this,” he says, turning his face to the stormy sky. “But there was nothing you could’ve done to change this. Your friend was lost the second Raiden tied that draft around his neck. I would know. That’s how Raiden broke me.”
He pulls back his cloak and points to the holes lining his shoulder.
“I made it through twenty-nine days of torture. But on the thirtieth, Raiden threatened to bind me with a suicide draft. I knew that meant I’d never be able to leave. So I gave in to the power of pain to save my neck—literally.”
Vane pulls me closer when I shiver.
“Why didn’t Gus tell us?” Vane asks.
“He probably didn’t know. Raiden bound Gus to break you.” Aston’s eyes focus on me. “I’m sure he expected there would be some sort of escape or rescue, and he wanted to ensure you’d regret it.”
“I do,” I whisper.
But there are questions that go with that—questions I can’t seem to hide from.
Would I have stayed if I’d known?
Would I have remained in that dungeon?
Sent Vane and Solana away and stayed at Raiden’s mercy?
I know what the answers should be, but . . . I don’t know.
“It’s okay,” Vane says, brushing tears off my cheeks. “I’m here.”
He is.
And I don’t deserve him.
I don’t deserve anything.
“I see the war you’re fighting,” Aston tells me. “Don’t let Raiden win. Take your freedom and use it to resist him.”
“I’m going to do more than resist him,” Vane says.
“Hm. I believe you,” Aston says. “Though you realize that comes with challenges.”
“I don’t care—there has to be a way to do it.”
I know what they’re discussing.
I know it’s my cue to be strong and join them. That’s what Gus is counting on. He wants me to keep fighting.
But I can’t help whispering, “Raiden always wins.”
“Not always,” a new voice says, and my blood boils when I realize it’s my mother.
“How would you know?” I shout. “Do you think you beat him just because you refused to be his queen?”
“Wait—what?” Vane asks as my mother blanches.