Elle walked across the grass at the Eternal Sun Resort, more than tipsy, wobbly even though her heels were in her hand, when she noticed the two grandmas sitting in the garden of the common area.
“Look who’s doing the walk of shame,” Violet said, smiling.
Elle reached them and plopped into a chair. “It’s not the walk of shame unless you’ve spent the night with someone. Besides, it’s five o’clock. Too early for the walk of shame.”
Violet glanced at her companion and they both chuckled. “In our time, anything after ten was the walk of shame. Heck, the death march of your reputation.”
“Mine died long ago,” Elle said.
“Nonsense, dear,” Violet answered, patting her on her hand. “All of us here know you’re golden.”
Mrs. Nicholson nodded too.
Elle loved these two grandmas. She’d gotten to know them pretty well during her time at the Resort. “Not sleeping tonight?”
“Old people don’t sleep. Not when they’re supposed to, anyway. And you? Still having trouble with it?”
Elle shrugged. “Getting better,” she lied, not that she was fooling anyone.
Mrs. Nicholson poured her a glass of iced tea. “Here. Did you have a nice time?”
“Yes, but I forgot how hard they party down here. I’m dead. And drunk.” Not dead or drunk enough as to be able to sleep, though. Not yet. “So, what are we watching?”
“Same old, same old.”
The three of them had spent many a night awake, watching the local TV channel these grandmas loved; the one that ran local news and forensic police shows.
“Great handiwork,” Mrs. Nicholson complimented Violet, pointing at Elle’s braids. “You still have the touch.”
Violet nodded. “Yes, fifty years working as a hairdresser. No arthritis, no cataracts can stop me. Muscle memory. Ingrained forever. When I die, you’d better hire a fantastic hairdresser for me. I have the names of a couple in the top drawer of my dresser. Don’t cut any corners, or I’ll come back and haunt you forever at night.”
Mrs. Nicholson turned her wrinkly eyes to Elle, a smile on her thin lips. “Like now, then.”
Violet waved her friend off. “So, dear, tell us, how come you’re coming back alone? Men should be fighting to walk you home.”
“I’d rather pay the cab fare. Less trouble. And you just want to snoop around my dates.”
“You can’t blame us. Seeing you beat the shit out of that rude man was the most fun I’ve had in a long while.”
Elle smiled at the memory. It had happened soon after moving to the Eternal Sun. Leave it to her to meet the state’s biggest son of a bitch on the very first day. It never failed. She was a magnet for asshole bad boys who believed the sun rose and set between their testicles. On the flip side, no matter how tough they pretended to be, their balls were as susceptible to knee kicks as anybody else’s. “I’m much tamer nowadays.”
“You seeing anyone?”
At the shake of her head, both grandmas frowned. “How are things going with that young man from James’s wedding? The big, scary one who scowled at you as if he was going to eat you.”
Elle chuckled. “Jack. And ‘as if he was going to murder me’ would be more accurate. He hates me.”
Mrs. Nicholson and Violet looked at each other and then both said, “Nah.”
That would mean so much more if the lovable grannies weren’t legally blind.
“I haven’t seen much of him since then. He’s been busy.”
His presence at Jonah’s christening had been a surprise. That he’d been his rude self hadn’t.
She’d also stopped sending him e-mails because he wasn’t undercover anymore. After all, she’d just wanted to keep him up to date. At least, that’s what she’d told herself to justify writing to him. Be that as it may, it had become such a habit she didn’t realize how much she enjoyed it until she decided not to write anymore. Going cold turkey had been damn hard. She missed it, even though he hadn’t answered, not even once.
“So you are not seeing each other?” Mrs. Nicholson asked, interrupting her thoughts. “His loss. Have I ever told you about my grandson?”
Elle laughed. Only one or two million times. Playing at matchmaking was the official sport at the Eternal Sun Resort. James had complained about it often enough, but he had no clue how bad it got, especially when you lived with the crazy seniors as she had for a year.
“Rita, your grandson is no match for Elle. She would eat him alive. I don’t mean any disrespect, dear.” Violet hurried to appease them both. “He is a sweetheart, but Elle needs…”
Elle looked at her, waiting for the grandma to finish. It would be good to know what she needed, seeing as she had no frigging clue herself.